Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,982
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Longtime friends

[ Edited ]

@KKJ  - I have been to a few of mine. And I always have fun. I think it was my 10th. My best friend and I brought our DH's, who did not know anyone else. They didn't leave the table all night and talked just to each other. After that we decided we would go without the guys! And we always have fun!


Our graduating class was 250. Last year one of our classmates decided we should get together after being quarantined for so long. It wasn't a special year - she just decided we should do this. It was at a pretty B&B by the water. DH and I went down, even though he stayed in the room and watched football! We just had one night. The dinner was outside, and we were spaced out. Best friend lives right there, so at least we got to spend the evening together. There were about 30 of us. 



So I will always advise people to go if they can. I've met some spouses of classmates that I've really enjoyed meeting too!  Smiley Happy



ETA: I met my best friend the day I started at my new school and we walked out to the hockey field together. We didn't live near each other after college graduations (she married after sophomore year), but during college we visited each other's schools (two states away). We were in each other's weddings. We don't live near each other, but we talk a lot and it's just like we live around the corner. We each still call each other our best friend.



 I met my three current closest friends when we were part of a group who loved Longaberger baskets. We've been through many life experiences together since then!  Smiley Happy

Honored Contributor
Posts: 26,815
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Family mostly gone, 1 friend from growing up, had friends from work but Covid ended that lunch bunch, and a book group I'd been in for 40 years, social life ended pretty much for years before covid because of family and health issues. 


My view of life is it is what it is and you can do the best you can with where you are or sit around and long for what was.  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 26,815
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Family mostly gone, 1 friend from growing up, had friends from work but Covid ended that lunch bunch, and a book group I'd been in for 40 years, social life ended pretty much for years before covid because of family and health issues. 


My view of life is it is what it is and you can do the best you can with where you are or sit around and long for what was.  


I will say this group of friends has been a real blessing.  

Valued Contributor
Posts: 753
Registered: ‎10-07-2020

@homedecor1 wrote:

I have friendships over 50+ years still going strong.  A week never passes we don't chat.  These are true lifetime friendships, including 1 who has "adopted" me as a daughter.  I love this lady more than a mom or more than she will ever know.


Here, ten years ago I made "acquaintances" sadly most have moved, passed away or no longer in the circle.


Right now, my immediate circle of friends are few. I'm much younger, don't golf or hang in our bar (which they do) they are widows who travel, play cards everyday, etc.  -- right now, I feel lonely as it's just spouse & I who truthfully are roommates.  His illness has dampened my lifestyle and honestly, I'm not adjusting well.


Hes focused on things (politics, tv all day) has no interest in what I enjoy.  I really don't know how long I can continue this caregiver job🤷‍♀️--he's become totally dependent on ME!  we hardly speak to each other 24/7 365 is just too much IMO and he doesn't drive anymore so I'm even the chauffeur to all doctor appts 3-5/days a week.  God forbid, I want to go out shopping, dinner (alone), the beach, pool -- he asks how long i'll be🤦‍♀️.  My life is no longer mine☹️☹️☹️



@homedecor1   Most places have some kind of "Senior Services" that offer various kinds of "helps," whether rides, or personal attendance to someone in the home, or trips to doc's visits, etc.  Perhaps you could get in touch with such "Senior Svcs" in your area, for them to pick up some of the slack that you're carrying, & you can take back some of your own life & interests. 


I'm not sure that God wants us to live the way you're presenting your life to be now...

...   There's GOT to be some kind of way to build back at least *some* relief in yr own life... & even have some "guiltless" .. "giggles" & "fun" & *respite* some times, incl with others, or even just yrself, do something.... if that's your pleasure!.... eh?.  Smiley Wink

Feelings are simply human
How we deal with, ..or express those feelings .. is our choice
. ~ . Please be kind . ~ .

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,081
Registered: ‎06-15-2015

@feline groovy 


Not sure your definition of anomaly is the same as mine. One of my best friends is a guy I grew up with in Public Housing Projects back in the 1940's, and is 2+ years my senior.


From my many years of Auto Racing I still have friends that are a decade or younger than me. Having run my Adult Hockey League for 52 years, I met many men younger than myself, along with others older than me. I even had the sons of players also playing in my league. Still friends with many of all different age groups.


With a hospital being my 2nd home for 14 years, and many visits of weeks, a few even over a month. I met different patients along with hospital staff that are still friends.


As far as family, my oldest sister moved many miles away in the year 2000. We still talked, but nothing like when we lived in the same city. She died at 91 several years ago. My youngest older sister died of cancer in 1989 when she was 52 years old. My middle older sister still lives fairly close to me, and we get together on occasion. She is 88 and her husband is 89, and he has some mobility issues.


Friends I have now? Met several through ice skating the last few years, and others I met in waiting rooms at the hospital and or/doctors offices. A few I met I had worked with many years ago before i retired, which was 31 years ago.


Maybe my definition of "friends" also is different than yours. 



hckynut  🇺🇸

Regular Contributor
Posts: 220
Registered: ‎10-16-2021

In August of1959 I met my best friend in line with our mothers as we waited to register for the first grade.  We were inseparable right up through the end of college in 1975 before life and jobs gave us a little separation.  We still saw each other frequently in the 80s, but the 90s and 20s saw us busy with our own stuff.  He moved to Florida in 2008, and the fact that 1,500 miles now separate us hasn't kept the e-mails, birthday cards, phone calls

and occasional visits from happening.

I have two other friends from the early 70s who are very much a part of my life today.

Many others have come and gone but still occupy a special place in my heart and memory.  There is a wonderful poem(?) that describes the three kinds of friends we have throughout our lives.  Friends for a REASON, friends for a SEASON, and friends for a LIFETIME.  Google it, it is very true.  All of these people serve a very important purpose

in our lives and help us as we navigate our trips around the sun.  


Having mentioned these wonderful friends, I would be absolutely remiss if I did not mention that I am one of 9 children.  7sisters, 1 brother.  As the oldest of this brood, 

and the only one who never married or had children. I have benefitted much from the love,care help, and companionship of all of them from time to time. a couple of them are very much my dear friends as well as siblings.

Whenever the movie "It's A Wonderful Life" is on and it gets to the part where Harry Bailey toasts his brother and says "To my big brother George.....the richest man in town!"  I nod my head in complete agreement and understanding.


Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,049
Registered: ‎03-15-2010

After reading all these posts I think I'm the anomaly.  I don't have any "long time friends".  After school everyone moved away (this was pre-FB).  Then I got married and bought a house and my neighbors were my friends.  I had work and church friends.  But, as my situation changed so did my environment and I made new friends.


I'm retired now and have new friends from church and volunteering.



Honored Contributor
Posts: 11,175
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

I met my 2 best friends in 1970.  From the moment we met, the 3 of us have been best friends, 52 years. I live in Georgia, one lives 2 hours away and the 3rd lives in Utah.  Our bond is as strong now as it was 52 years ago.  Those 2 girls are my tribe.


I have another very close friend from even before that, 1967.  She lives out of state.  We talk often and still exchange Christmas gifts. 


Another from 1972, high school,  that I am still very close to even though she lives out of state.


I don't have a ton of true, deep friendships and those deep friendships I do have started long ago.

Why is it, when I have a 50/50 guess at something, I'm always 100% wrong?
Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,237
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

I'm kinda in the same boat.  Most of my family is gone.  And friends have either moved far away, have passed away or things have happened and we're not close any more.  I have a few friends that I made in recent years that I hear from sporadically but they are not what I call bosom friends from years go.  

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." - Steve Martin
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,698
Registered: ‎03-09-2010
Interesting read.... I have "acquaintances" from school, Master Gardeners, and past jobs. My one true friend and I have known each other since 7th grade 60 years ago. Two of my long-time friends died about 20 years ago. I just don't get close to anyone any more.
* A woman is like a tea bag. You can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water. *
- Eleanor Roosevelt