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04-22-2022 02:58 PM
@moonandthestars : You are just plain WRONG!!!!
04-22-2022 05:24 PM
This story is so off-the-wall questions are reasonable.
As far as any OP not coming back, not just you, it is also reasonable to think you MAY have just ignored answering posters.
We have seen this many times; a story is posted, people spend time on it, and the OP never returns but is seen posting elswhere.
The intent is not so much to doubt you as it is to wrap oneself around such a story that is unbelievable.
Face it-even you said you thought you had heard everything.
When something like this is posted, expect the questions and doubts.
04-22-2022 06:18 PM
Every time I return to this thread, Lady Macbeth's line "Screw your courage to the sticking place" comes into my head. In high school I never really understood its meaning. Now the truth of those words is relevant too often.
@Duckncover - You need to do something that will be difficult. 99% of the time, being the kind, non-prying aunt is the way to go. This incident falls into the other 1%.
No matter how she talks about it, something terrible happened to your niece. Something none of us here has ever heard of. She experienced having the man she loves permitting her to be banned and isolated and not taking action to stand up for her.
Just observing whether the relationship will fizzle is not enough on your part. You must pry and intervene, no matter how doing that turns out. Your niece has to talk about this in depth.
Right now I know a woman whose husband is getting insufficient care in a nursing home. She refuses to speak up because she's afraid she'll make things worse.
Take a deep breath and jump in. Please.
04-22-2022 08:09 PM
@PickyPicky3 She is 30 years old. I would be done with this guy, but that is her decision to make. Her Aunt can only be there as a soft landing if she makes the wrong choice.
04-22-2022 08:47 PM
@manny2 I agree with you 99% of the time. From my perspective, this situation is so bizarre that it surpasses age issues.
04-23-2022 07:23 AM
That just would NOT have worked for me.
I would have immediately demanded the boyfriend arrange for my return home on the first flight out of there.
The end.
04-23-2022 08:47 AM
@PickyPicky3 wrote:@manny2 I agree with you 99% of the time. From my perspective, this situation is so bizarre that it surpasses age issues.
@PickyPicky3 I don't disagree with you. Bizarre is an understatement. His lack of consideration, and failure to give boundaries to his parents astounds me. The problem is she is invested, and thought this guy was ready to propose, so in all probability she will stay with him ignoring the red flags.
I would definitely tell her what I thought, but she is going to do whatever she wants to do anyway. People tell a story by their actions. The fact that he socialized with his parents while his girlfriend sat in a trailer tells it all.
I hope we get an update on what happens.
04-23-2022 08:50 AM
@Maggie Nolia wrote:That just would NOT have worked for me.
I would have immediately demanded the boyfriend arrange for my return home on the first flight out of there.
The end.
@Maggie Nolia - I'm an independent person. I would have made my own flight arrangements. Don't need anyone to do it for me.
04-23-2022 08:54 AM - edited 04-23-2022 11:58 AM
@PickyPicky3 wrote:Every time I return to this thread, Lady Macbeth's line "Screw your courage to the sticking place" comes into my head. In high school I never really understood its meaning. Now the truth of those words is relevant too often.
@Duckncover - You need to do something that will be difficult. 99% of the time, being the kind, non-prying aunt is the way to go. This incident falls into the other 1%.
No matter how she talks about it, something terrible happened to your niece. Something none of us here has ever heard of. She experienced having the man she loves permitting her to be banned and isolated and not taking action to stand up for her.
Just observing whether the relationship will fizzle is not enough on your part. You must pry and intervene, no matter how doing that turns out. Your niece has to talk about this in depth.
Right now I know a woman whose husband is getting insufficient care in a nursing home. She refuses to speak up because she's afraid she'll make things worse.
Take a deep breath and jump in. Please.
I was going to say the same thing. You need to find out EVERYTHING because what you posted leaves a great big question mark. Find out more. Find out everything! What's the worst that could happen? Get the full story, otherwise you maybe shouldn't even have posted in the first place.
04-23-2022 10:23 AM
@gidgetgh wrote:
@Maggie Nolia wrote:That just would NOT have worked for me.
I would have immediately demanded the boyfriend arrange for my return home on the first flight out of there.
The end.
@Maggie Nolia - I'm an independent person. I would have made my own flight arrangements. Don't need anyone to do it for me.
Bless your heart.
While I'm perfectly willing and able to make my own arrangements, the onus would be on him to make the arrangements and pay for it, all to my satisfaction.
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