Is it customary to have a baby shower for baby #2 ... - Page 7

Carmie · ‎10-25-2010

Just last week, I received an invitation to a baby sprinkle for my niece. I had no idea what this meant. I mentioned the invite to my older sister who said it was a baby shower. She also said my younger sister, who's is the mother of my niece was angry and livid that invitations had gone out for a shower for a second baby. My nieces husband's family is sponsoring the event.

In my family, A VERY big family I might add, it has always been considered tacky to have a shower for second or third pregnancies.

I looked up proper etiquette and it seems to be okay to do this. Because this is my niece, I will go, but these gift giving occasions are getting to be way too much,

Another niece invited us to a Baptism reception. I know that a gift is expected and proper. I have already given an expensive shower gift and took a gift for the baby when I went to see her for the first time. This will be the third gift for the same baby,

The last couple of baby showers that I attended have been huge, expensive affairs. They were held at a country club, upscale restaurant or some other fancy venue and were catered. The guests showed up with numerous gifts. There were 100 to 200 ladies invited. Some showers even invited men.

The mom to be got everything she needed or wanted, including nursery furniture.

Gone are the days of nice intimate gatherings where the mom to be was showered with gifts for her baby. Now a days, a shower is as lavish as a wedding reception.

CANDLEQUEEN · ‎03-09-2010

My daughter just had her 2nd baby girl two months ago, and I am throwing a shower for her next month. It will be much smaller than their 1st shower, because they do not need crib, stroller, high chair, etc. Also they had another girl, however her girls were born in different seasons, The 1st child was born in December and this one was born in June, so while she may not need the big items, the small items will come in handy and like another poster posted, it's just nice to celebrate the new baby!

bonnielu · ‎03-11-2010

Why not. Why should the birth order matter.

CANDLEQUEEN · ‎03-09-2010

Oh and I also found out that a 2nd Shower if it is considreably smaller than the first shower is called a Sprinkle...Isn't that cute???

SahmIam · ‎04-16-2010

My world:

Shower for first baby usually is huge: the couple receive just about everything they need. Large ticket items are purchased by either the grandparents or many chip in and buy the item. Funny thing, experienced moms ALWAYS bring a huge bulk package of diapers. I didn't get it when I had my shower but I did AFTER the baby was born!!!!

Having a second child isn't cheap. ANother car seat, maybe another crib (depending on how close in age they are). Maybe a double stroller is needed. If a different sex, then clothing showcasing that (yes, some people don't like "girl" or "boys" clothing for children. To each their own.) but clothes do wear out/get heavily stained so they are needed. Same with burping clothes.

Some people will say "please, nothing is needed but if you WANT to bring something... diapers and wipes". Practical and welcomed. One family member had to use very expensive formula as the baby had a medical condition: it was $35 a tub and smaller than the standard size tub of formula. The couple is Jewish so no baby shower prior to the birth but you can believe she was loaded up with formula afterwards!

So, in my world, it really comes down to NEEDS not wants. Doesn't matter what's on Pinterst or Mommyblogs....common sense is more the norm than running with the popular crowd.

Lila Belle · ‎01-24-2013

@NicksmomESQ wrote:
I think that bridal as well as baby showers have become gift grabs!! I'm not cheap.In fact I'm quite generous but I don't appreciate being railroaded into attending fancy catered showers!! If I choose not to attend these events I would be criticized so I attend.Then after when I'm invited to the couple's home or to come see the newborn I have to bring another gift!!
I'm very generous with those people I want to give gifts to but I don't appreciate being put in a position where I have to.Getting married & having a baby is expensive!! If you can't handle the cost don't do it or do it cheaper! When I married & had a baby I refused the bridal & baby showers.We had no money! We paid for our own wedding in a friends backyard! People gave me gifts because they chose to not because they had to!!
I also don't appreciate the bridal/baby registry's.These days when I get invitations to engagement parties,weddings,bridal & baby showers a card is always included instructing the invitee that the recipient wants you to purchase their preselected gifts from certain retailers.I think this is tacky.It is not my responsibility to support other people's lifestyles! I've even gotten invitations to second bridal showers!! I had to go to keep the peace!!
I've also been asked to give cash to help pay for an expensive 3 week honeymoon in Paris!! When does it end??
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Maybe those people who gave you wedding and baby gifts felt railroaded and thought your life events were "gift grabs" too.?

Carmie · ‎10-25-2010

@CANDLEQUEEN wrote:
My daughter just had her 2nd baby girl two months ago, and I am throwing a shower for her next month. It will be much smaller than their 1st shower, because they do not need crib, stroller, high chair, etc. Also they had another girl, however her girls were born in different seasons, The 1st child was born in December and this one was born in June, so while she may not need the big items, the small items will come in handy and like another poster posted, it's just nice to celebrate the new baby!

I have never heard of a shower being held for a baby who is already three months old, though I have attended Baptism receptions for babies this age.

I would be uncomfortable having a shower for a second child, three months after her birth. I would just invite people to a gathering to meet the new baby and celebrate. Most people would bring a gift for such an occasion anyway,

I guess things are different in your neck of the woods. Not wrong, just different.

Congratulations on your new granddaughter.

seaBreeze · ‎02-04-2014

Last winter, my "cousin" had an unusual situation .... her 20-year-old son (in college), had an "oops" baby with his girlfriend. The girlfriend already had a baby with another boy 15 months prior to getting pregnant with this second child. No marriage in my cousin's son's future since still in college.

A baby shower was given in this situation which I thought was not appropriate.

CaneCorsoMom · ‎09-03-2011

NO - its rude and greedy

Lipstickdiva · ‎03-10-2010

I was thinking about this and I couldn't think of one baby shower I'd been invited to for a second baby. At this point, only 1 friend of mine had more than 1 child and there was a shower for her first and that was it.

Most in my family only had 1 and if they had 2, there was no second shower. I have younger cousins now who are just starting families so we'll see if they have multiple babies if they have multiple showers.

I recently attended a baby shower given by the grandmothers to be. One wanted to split the shower so it was 2 smaller showers and the other refused so they had 1 large shower. It was for 75 people. The amount of gifts was overwhelming and consequently, the parents to be barely really got to look at any of the gifts. They were being opened and put aside so everyone wasn't there for hours upon hours while they opened gifts. It was really too much.

If anyone I know has a second child and there is a second shower, if I"m available, I would certainly attend. I'm giving a gift anyhow, why not.