Community Chat

[IlliniGirl88]

I've never watched this show on a regular basis, too depressing and gross to watch, but I have seen a few episodes. 

The last one I saw was months ago about an older woman who lived in a beautiful Tudor style home.  Two men had bought the property, but allowed her to go back in and claim whatever personal items she wanted (I believe she lost the house to foreclosure).  The woman's brothers and these two men were trying to help her, but she was a mean, nasty woman.  She had excuses for EVERYTHING and why she had to keep EVERYTHING.  She was a master manipulator and was running everyone down who tried to help.  Her therapist was even there and she couldn't help.  The city was sending a dump truck to get all of her junk off the street, because she'd put so much of her items at the curb.  She was clueless and of course blamed everyone else for her problems.  It was really sad to watch.

[house_cat]

I have the opposite problem - I love to clean and throw things away.  I sometimes throw away things that I should have saved and wind up repurchasing them.  Yes, that's nuts, but at least it's hygenic, lol.

I find the show to be very sad, because it's clearly a serious mental illness. In fact, I understand that it's one of the toughest to treat.  I catch the show every  once in a while and guaranteed, when it's finished, I'm up and cleaning like a maniac.

[HappyDaze]

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@nun ya wrote:

The garbage is hard to understand. I always yell...Pick up a garbage bag!! I can't imagine drinking a drink and tossing the container on the floor.

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or the human and animal feces all over. This one lady would just poop all over the house. No diaper, nothing, just did it on top of the junk. It made me physically ill. 

[qtrmoonlady1]

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@birkin baby wrote:

My mom is a hoarder. I was in my 30's when she started hoarding. Her hoarding has caused a major disconnect in our family. She has alienated all her friends as well. It is a battle my sister and I will not win. She refuses to get therapy or take meds. She cannot..literally cannot..see her situation. The show does not begin to show the day to day stress and anguish the family goes through. The hoarder is just fine living  in their hoard. My sister and I are ,for now,defeated. We had to stop and walk back from her . It was so destructive to our own lives. Do not think we do t know it's revolting and disgusting,etc. Those adjectives don't begin to express our feelings.  There are so many families hiding their hoarding relatives...it would shock you ll!!!

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@birkin baby I always feel so bad for the children because they and others who try to help just can't get through to the hoarder.  So often they show the hoarder, who has agreed to let the team clean up, take stuff out of the garbage as the team is throwing it away, and even after the house has been cleaned up, the hoarder shows signs of going back to the same routine.  What a terrible thing to have to deal with - I'm sorry you are going through this.   

[software]

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@HappyDaze wrote:

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@nun ya wrote:

The garbage is hard to understand. I always yell...Pick up a garbage bag!! I can't imagine drinking a drink and tossing the container on the floor.

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or the human and animal feces all over. This one lady would just poop all over the house. No diaper, nothing, just did it on top of the junk. It made me physically ill. 

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Oh good grief, that needs to be a WHOLE different show.

I'm not Dr Phil but that's mental illness, probably brought on by some past abuse or trauma.

[cerb]

First, I want to state how sorry I am for those of you who grew up in a hoarder's house, or who have a relative who is a hoarder.  (((hugs))).

I've watched the show off and on through the years.  One of the things I've learned is that the illness runs the gamut, from mild to severe.  I believe that some of the people make lasting changes for the better, but others are hopeless.

It seems as though most hoarders started off as run-of-the-mill collectors.  They had a lot of "stuff" but it wasn't problematic until something happens in their life that pushes them over the edge.  That can be a death, divorce, job loss, illness, or even children growing up and leaving home.  After the event the person with a tendency toward having a lot of stuff becomes a full-blown hoarder.  I find some of the hoarders sympathetic, but many of them are unpleasant, manipulative, and downright mean.  It's hard to keep in mind that they are mentally ill.

Any time I watch the show I find myself getting up and cleaning the room, and with a greater willingness to donate excess belonging.  So in that sense, it's kind-of inspirational.

[IMW]

I watch regularly to remind myself to stop buying. I am a compulsive cleaner and after each episode I look for things to throw away or donate. I also start cleaning.

Living in an apartment there really is no room for excess stuff. I believe I have hoarding tendencies but have been cured of them by my husband who is a minamilist. He is always organizing and throwing out.

After 41 years he has really influenced me.

Now I try not to buy unless I have a spot for something,

I get rid of something and then replace it. Of course this does not apply to clothes and jewelry like it should.

[catlover]

@DrKelli

does the profesional organizer make you throw things out?

What do they do when they come to your house-I'm asking because at my husbans insistence-one is coming to my house in a few weeks...............

[DrKelli]

@catlover, They don't "make" you do anything.  But when you see all the stuff out of, say your cabinets, piled on the counter and you see how much there is, you tend to donate a bunch of it.  My organizer actually takes everything I donate with her, so I can't go back into the garage and start picking through it again.

I scheduled 2 hour sessions with her and would pick one area to work on.  When you know you've only got 2 hours, it helps you focus on sorting quickly and getting rid of things (at least it did me).

Sometimes she brought organizing bins--I didn't want things binned up in my closet because I was afraid it would fall into a black hole, so I focused on getting rid of things.  I tried stuff on right in front of her and if it didn't fit, into the donation pile it went.  I did use some smaller bins in the kitchen and my cupboards look much neater.

If paper is your issue, you've got to go through them and talk about why you are keeping certain things.

It is not an easy process and there were some things that I refused to get rid of (like my grandmother's tablecloth).  And I got snotty with her when she kept messing with a cupboard that I was fine with on the first round.  She got snotty with me first though.

You have to be ready and willing to purge stuff though, otherwise organization will not help you.

[catlover]

@DrKelli

thank you so much for your response-my problem is mostly clothes-so much.I have stuff that does not fit for when I lose that 20, 30 ,50 pounds...............and yes I will not be parting with my shoes either........