Re: Handling Retirement

OKPrincess · ‎03-10-2013

@srgtdjwrote:
I am retiring from a job that I have had for the past 20 years. The retirement is my choice and I am excited about starting a new chapter with my husband who is already retired. But my exit from the job has me feeling sad. Usually I was the one who would coordinate announcements, good luck in retirement parties or even cake in the office. But now that's I am the one retiring it feels like everyone is just moving on. I know I am the one makig the change and for them all life at the office goes on as usual. But after 20 years there and doing my best to help others...it just feels like I'm unappreciated. Has anyone else experienced this? I suspect the feeling will pass once I am actually gone from the office and fully into my retired life. I guess I am feeling dismissed. Maybe just too sensitive.

Now that I know your age the biggest obstacle for you will be the cost health insurance. When we retired we stayed on my insurance “cobra” until last September and paid almost $1200/month. We are on Obamacare until the fall and then Medicare.

AngelPuppy1 · ‎03-13-2010

@srgtdjwrote:
I am retiring from a job that I have had for the past 20 years. The retirement is my choice and I am excited about starting a new chapter with my husband who is already retired. But my exit from the job has me feeling sad. Usually I was the one who would coordinate announcements, good luck in retirement parties or even cake in the office. But now that's I am the one retiring it feels like everyone is just moving on. I know I am the one makig the change and for them all life at the office goes on as usual. But after 20 years there and doing my best to help others...it just feels like I'm unappreciated. Has anyone else experienced this? I suspect the feeling will pass once I am actually gone from the office and fully into my retired life. I guess I am feeling dismissed. Maybe just too sensitive.

@srgtdj

Congrats on your retirement! You worked hard for a long time and your deserve this. Of course, you will feel sad. This is a huge change! It will take you some time to acclimate. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself some time to find your way in your new life. It's often hard to accept that in this world today things are constantly changing and at times I think us more mature people don't always feel as relevant. It will be a good thing!

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." - Steve Martin

CalminHeart · ‎03-09-2010

I retired after 39 years with large corporation. It's funny how people move on and don't seem to miss you. It's the natural course of things in human life. Do you have a couple of people you'd like to stay in touch with? Five of us go to lunch once a month -- 2 retirees and 3 current employees. I hear from a couple others on occasion too.

You decide what you want. Find some new interests, charity work. In my case, I work 15 hours a week in customer service at a grocery store, do some charity work, help take care of my elderly dad and disabled sister, exercise, and take time to lounge on the deck while my dog plays outside. I feel like I'm busier now than I was when working fulltime and love it because it's my choice.

Find your niche in retirement.

Fyi, it took me less than the walk from the building to the parking ramp to adjust to retirement. I love it and am happy with my new life.

buyornot · ‎03-10-2010

@Pookwrote:
For me it was a great experience. I just left after nearly 40 years and didn't tell anyone because I did not want the party, etc and all the sadness that goes with retirement. It worked out great. I did and do still miss the interaction with my coworkers daily but I do get together with many often and our retirees meet several times a year. Also there is an office picnic yearly that retirees are invited to. I bake and bring treats in and everyone is always happy to see me.

I left teaching the same way after 40 years-tried to keep as low-key as possible. I had my gift be a donation to a local scholarship and didn't discuss it much at all at work. I think it made things easier for everyone, especially me In retirement, try not to think about yourself too much-serving others still works to make me feel better about life!

buyornot · ‎03-10-2010

@CalminHeartwrote:
I retired after 39 years with large corporation. It's funny how people move on and don't seem to miss you. It's the natural course of things in human life. Do you have a couple of people you'd like to stay in touch with? Five of us go to lunch once a month -- 2 retirees and 3 current employees. I hear from a couple others on occasion too.

You decide what you want. Find some new interests, charity work. In my case, I work 15 hours a week in customer service at a grocery store, do some charity work, help take care of my elderly dad and disabled sister, exercise, and take time to lounge on the deck while my dog plays outside. I feel like I'm busier now than I was when working fulltime and love it because it's my choice.

Find your niche in retirement.

Fyi, it took me less than the walk from the building to the parking ramp to adjust to retirement. I love it and am happy with my new life.

HA! Your last paragraph was my finding exactly! So surprising how easy things were.

I am still oxox · ‎03-09-2010

I retired as of Jan 1 2016, DH will be retiring with in the next 18 months. We are most likely selling the Co op we are in now and buying a town house in FL, am I scared Heck yeah

Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and start being positive what could go right.

drizzellla · ‎03-14-2010

Yes, retiring is a big adjustment. And you don't know what to expect until you go through it.

When I retired, all "they" talked about was that they would be calling me in from time to time and would I please be able to work for them part time. I agreed.

I still have the security fob to get into the building and I left some personal items in my desk because I was told I would be coming back for a few days a week.

Got emails, the first few weeks I was retired. And then one Sunday night I replied to an email from a co-worker. It returned as undeliverable. Tried to send it 3 times, same result. I thought, no big deal, next time she writes, I will reply. Never happened.

Did not hear from my boss or co-workers again.

Guess they moved on and so have I. I think about all the times I stayed late to meet impossible deadlines, all the mistakes other people made and I corrected, all the work I did for other people because they were too busy working on her husband's basketball league work.

Makes me happy I am out of there. I now hang out with friends, who really are my friends.
And "they" settled into a new routine and I have too. I can't say I miss the constant pressure. I thought we were friends, quess I was wrong.

Mominohio · ‎08-08-2010

I haven't read all the replies but congrats on retirement!

I think there are fewer and fewer people stepping up to be the 'orgainzer' and 'doer' for things in the work place. In many places things have changed over the last 30 years or more.

In general, people aren't as tied to or loyal to jobs. They move around a lot, they often aren't very fulfilled by work, and find their real joy outside the work place. There is more and more stress at work as companies expect more with giving less. It all adds up to the fact that for many work places, people are friendly and get along well, but move on quickly because of a full personal life.

For many, most rituals of the past have either been discarded or have been drastically changed. Events and celebrations just don't happen for many anymore, or they are done differently, and in different ways. The old ways and traditions just aren't important or even on the radar of many younger people.

In some work settings, it seems they are always celebrating something, selling something, collecting for something etc. It gets to be too much, and I understand when people just shut it down, and don't want to participate in any of it, because there is too much of it, and to pick and choose which to support/participate in/celebrate can make one rather unpopular.

And if you were the one to do it all in the past, there isn't much reason to expect that anyone will step up and do something or much of something, because it really has been more of a one sided effort in the past, and people aren't in the position of having experience in doing it.

It would hurt my feelings a bit too, but I'd move on very quickly with the new and exciting chapter in my life. And I'd maybe learn a lesson for the future, that if I was the only one, or the one most invested in doing things like this, I'd be asking myself if it was worth my time, effort, creativity, money etc. to be in a similar position for such things in the future. Maybe it is worth it to you, and maybe it isn't, but I would look at that as I move into the next chapter.

151949 · ‎03-09-2010

I think if your ready to retire there is no adjustment.I walked out the door whistling a happy tune because I was never going back.My final day at work it was bitter cold out and as I stood on the sidewalk waiting for the bus I just kept telling myself this was the last time I'd have to wait in the freezing cold for the stupid shuttle bus to my car. I said farewell to the University of Pittsburgh and have never gone back !!

I am still friends with several co workers on Facebook and so I keep up with what is going on in everyone's lives that way. Since we no longer live in the same place we do not see my former co workers, except for those I am still close personal friends with.

I don't get the "retirement is a big adjustment" attitude. It wasn't for me. But then I had a big surgery 8 days after I retired and then spent the next 4 months in a wheelchair and 6 months after that in rehab so I had other things to occupy my mind.