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Occasional Contributor
Posts: 5
Registered: ‎11-21-2021

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

SOME charities are very picky.  If you call around to others--IF there are others in your area, whether Salvation Army, or smaller non-chain charities--ask them what they accept (some of them have websites where they specify acceptable items).  It sure beats the heck out of adding more to landfills...

Occasional Contributor
Posts: 5
Registered: ‎11-21-2021

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

If you don't want to donate the items (it seems that in today's Tax environment, donations don't really make a huge difference on one's tax return anymore), perhaps consider listing your items for sale on Facebook Marketplace, or eBay, or other online resale store.  You can typically specify if you want only local buyers (to avoid having to pack the items and ship them).  It's a thought.  IF your daughters don't want the stuff, you no longer need it, and they are not on speaking terms with each other OR you, go ahead and sell the stuff, and treat yourself to a nice weekend getaway, or save the money to use in an emergency for yourself.

Occasional Contributor
Posts: 5
Registered: ‎11-21-2021

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

Re @drizzellla 

 

[...We tried to donate the piano. No one wanted it. So sadly this beautiful work of art mahogany piano went to the dump. I still regret it's demise. But after years of trying to give it away, no one wanted it....]

 

I am SURPRISED that you couldn't find even a church that would accept the piano, or perhaps a nursing home or daycare center, or a public school.  They usually love donations of expensive musical instruments.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,048
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want


@ElenaB35 wrote:

Re @drizzellla 

 

[...We tried to donate the piano. No one wanted it. So sadly this beautiful work of art mahogany piano went to the dump. I still regret it's demise. But after years of trying to give it away, no one wanted it....]

 

I am SURPRISED that you couldn't find even a church that would accept the piano, or perhaps a nursing home or daycare center, or a public school.  They usually love donations of expensive musical instruments.



It was an upright grand piano. So it was quite heavy and large. It seemed that smaller and lighter pianos are more in demand. They can be moved easily if needed.

Occasional Contributor
Posts: 5
Registered: ‎11-21-2021

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

Response to@traveler 

 

[I have a lot of Jim Shore Heartwood Creek figurines to move on. Used to donate to Senior Center but they aren't accepting donations because of COVID.]

 

I LOVE Jim Shore figurines, but the only ones I have every acquired have been ones I found in Thrift Stores... I'd be happy to take yours off your hands, if you still have them.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 507
Registered: ‎07-30-2013

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

What a problem for so many of us! My 83 year old mother thinks her full bookshelf of photo albums will be her greatest gift, sigh. I have numerous friends in our mid-60s with multiple storage units full of parents' stuff- expensive& a daily reminder of undone purging AND the pitfalls of hoarding indoors(no room to sit down etc). As the t-shirt of Buddha says "Let that s- go". I am regularly doing projects to declutter as I know it is a huge burden in the future. I gave away 90% MIL stuff- including a full pickup truck of just yarn. Tears. Progress. My own memories are dimming and I am trying to make new memories to boost positivity. Not easy!
Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,916
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want


@birdQ13 wrote:
What a problem for so many of us! My 83 year old mother thinks her full bookshelf of photo albums will be her greatest gift, sigh. I have numerous friends in our mid-60s with multiple storage units full of parents' stuff- expensive& a daily reminder of undone purging AND the pitfalls of hoarding indoors(no room to sit down etc). As the t-shirt of Buddha says "Let that s- go". I am regularly doing projects to declutter as I know it is a huge burden in the future. I gave away 90% MIL stuff- including a full pickup truck of just yarn. Tears. Progress. My own memories are dimming and I am trying to make new memories to boost positivity. Not easy!


I refuse to be weighed down by "things". While not a minimalist, I lean that way.  I kept very few of my husband's things.  Only the very few things that were very special to me.  Same with my mom and dad.  I have no desire to rent storage units that you never go to just to house stuff I don't want. I think cleaning out someone's possessions is both physically and emotionally difficult, but you just can't keep everything nor should you feel made to do so. 

Good for you @birdQ13  for decluttering. 


Why is it, when I have a 50/50 guess at something, I'm always 100% wrong?
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,446
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

When we downsized and moved to the coast, I let mostly everything go.  I had formal cherrywood living and dining room that neither of my children would want.  I donated what I could and only kept what I could comfortably keep in the new house, which wasn't much.  I have two end tables from my grandmother from the 1960"s that I still use.  They are authentic mid-century and look great in my great room.  I have a victrola record player stand that was my grandmother's and my mother used in the hallway for the only phone we had in the house, she refinished for me and I still have in the the alcove leading to our master bedroom.  Its small, cute and I know one of my children will use it someday.   I also have a very small armoire in my guest room in the corner, I want to get it refinished.  It was my DH's grandmother's.  I didn't have a problem "letting go" of the big stuff.  It's the way it is. I refused to get a storage unit, so many of my friends have storage units as the houses here don't have basements.   My children are leading totally different lives than I did, they're happy with their lives, so I'm happy.  

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,930
Registered: ‎01-09-2011

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

[ Edited ]

After my Mom passed, I quickly learned that no one wants your stuff.

 

A year after her death, the estate sale and selling her home we decided to move out of state to what used to be, our second home. We ended up selling our big house and most of it's contents. Two estate sales in a short span of time was a tad much! I lost my attachement to "stuff" after going through the house Mom has lived in for 64 years, it gave me perspective on my own things. Though she was not a hoarder and was very clean and organized, I have told myself that I don't want anyone to have to do that for me!

 

It's a very free feeling letting go of "things"! It was worth getting rid of the bulk of it.

"Cats are poetry in motion. Dogs are gibberish in neutral." -Garfield
Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,987
Registered: ‎05-21-2010

Re: Family Heirlooms That Our Children Don't Want

I cannot fathom why anyone would rent a storage unit to house furniture and items that they don't want.  I have a friend who does that. It is all stuff that came from his mother's house. He would not have it in his house under any circumstance but cannot bring himself to give it away. My grown daughters have no interest keeping my china, silver or crystal. And this past year I have been getting rid of many collectibles. I look at them and shake my head while wondering why I thought anyone would want them.

I don't believe that furniture cannot be given away. There are always people who need furniture. Before I would hoard it it a storage unit or haul it off to the landfill I would advertise it on Facebook market place or Nextdoor as 'free come and get it." In the past 2 years I have donated a sofa, coffee table, TV console and a dining room table and chairs to the Salvation Army. Of course they checked to make sure it was clean and in good condition. They picked it up and hopefully someone found a use for these items.  Where I live there are thrift stores connected with various charities and they gladly accept donations.