Community Chat

[riley1]

Yes, I do. And, today is one of those days.

[Financialgrl]

BF died 6 months ago.  We'd been together for over 30 years and he had his main residence and then a cabin on 6 acres in the mountains about 2 hrs away.  I'd go stay with him in his main residence and whenever we had too much of each other or began to get on each other's nerves, he'd retreat to his cabin and I'd retreat to my house.  Doing so meant we rarely fought or had issues! It worked out very well! 

[Shorty2U]

I disagree.lol. I am with my husband mostly all the time when he finishes work each day and all weekend long. (I don't work anymore) He is my 2nd husband of just over 12 years, and my best friend and takes me to all my Dr appts, we grocery shop together, go out to eat together, and go to movies etc etc.. I cant do all i used to (not allowed to drive anymore) and lost a lot of my friends due to my spine issues and other health problems, but he has stood by me even before we were married on. (Also I have children and grandchildren who I am close to).But other than them and 1 real good friend since i was young, most others have let me down! I do get lots of time alone though too, as I don't work as I said. Plus he goes to bed at 9 and i stay up very late (like now. lol) 

To add- my first husband had a lot of hobbies, wasn't around always, and the he got a hobby of cheating on the Internet after 19 years of marriage. My husband (now) went through the same thing with his first wife. Not to say having hobbies makes you cheat but my husband and I have learned lots from our previous marriages!. Sure its nice to have friends, but we love doing most everything together! (And we rarely argue so we don't drive each other crazy too much lol)

[Hayfield]

DH retired two years ago and it's been an adjutment, for me!  He doesn't mind being together 24/7 but I do!  I miss my alone time!  I'm not a solitary person, I just like that little bit of "me" time.  I also enjoy my "girl friend" time.  We moved to a lovely "active" community last year and I've had fun making new friends.  The only friends he's made are the ones we've made together but he doesn't have any "guy" friends.  We walk, ride bikes and we're now playing pickelball together.  I also play pickelball with a group of women and it would be nice if he would play with a group of men.  He played poker with some old friends before we moved and there are groups that play poker here but he doesn't seem interested.  It's getting better but again, miss my alone time!  

[cherry]

Different strokes for different folks. We aren't all the same, what works for some, might not ,for others

[RedTop]

Yes.  

T H E  biggest adjustment of my life has been with work schedules and being home together with my husband.  

I was home alone, or home with the girls for many years.  Then came years of shift work; me on nights and him on days.   Next was both of us working days; M-F, home in the evenings and every weekend. 

And now we are retired; he was forced into retirement due to company shutdown, and worsening health issues.  I quit my job to be home with him.   He struggled with retirement; I embraced it and have been totally content since day one. 

The last 6 months have been tough; a big pressure ulcer on his foot that led to partial amputation.  Days, weeks, and months of togetherness for 2 people who are polar opposites, but we have weathered this storm and are more than ready to enjoy Spring.   

My husband got out of the house yesterday and did some visiting.   Life is good!

[minkbunny]

• I was a widow when I met my husband and was blessed to have been given a second chance at love.  We have been married 15 years and I honestly still cannot get enough of him. He is smart, he is funny, he is kind,  a true country gentleman -  and he says everyday that I am the best thing that has ever happened to him. 

We do have separate lives but the life I love best is the hours I spend with him.  We don't have to be in the same room (right now I am at the opposite end of the house, we are each watching separate tv shows) - I work from home and spend hours at a time in the home office but wander in and out to chat with him and share a cup of coffee.  I am a legal assistant and work drafting documents so I don't have set days or set hours - just assigments. 

I volunteer one day a week and spend the day with friends shopping/eating one day a week - hubby and I meet friends for a three hour lunch/chat each Wednesday followed by our weekly trip to the library to pick out our books for the week and he goes out to breakfast with friends quite often. I have gone to plays, movies, etc., with friends and he has spent the day with friends looking at farm equipment, horses, saddles, whatever.....

I came home the other day, said my usual "Honey, I'm home - and got no reply. "   It scared me for just a minute until I realized he had told me he had plans that afteroon.   Sure,  I could survie on my own -

but, God, i don't want to. 

So, to answer the question - depends on the couple I suppose. 

[GenXmuse]

I believe you can get too much of anything!

[PamelaSue72]

My husband is retiring in May; I am retiring in December. We are making plans to do things together. He loves to fish and I plan to go with him; while he's fishing, I'll sit and read my book. We're still together. We are planning to do some hiking, followed by picnic-type meals. We are planning to take Master Gardener classes together.

But.....I just bought a she-shed for the back yard. This will be my place to spnnd some quiet time, just for me. We will work on the interior of the shed (insulating, drywall, wiring, etc), add a nice couch, a desk for my lap tap, a smal fridge, and my extra Keurig. One of the walls will be a solid bookcase for my books. I have a lot of plants in my office at work and I'll bring them home to the shed....can't have them in the house because of the cats.

And when I need some quiet time? Out to the shed, I'll go. I'm looking forward to getting the shed finished.

Win-win, IMO.