Re: Can It Really Be 1 in 5?

QueenDanceALot · ‎04-18-2013

On 9/18/2014 fluffie said:
Some of the most abusive people I have seen are women. It is not only men who abuse.

Time for another double face palm.

mstyrion · ‎08-29-2014

On 9/18/2014 fluffie said:
ALL of the women I have seen interviewed on this topic (sadly, they are all African American) condone and use physical violence to discipline their young children. And yes, I consider taking any object to beat anyone as violent. They all say that it is the "Southern" way and they had it done to them as children. I have never hit my dog much less a child.

your post is appalling.

I am Caucasian and I was hit with a belt when I was a child. I am not from the South.

Maybe you should just stop and think for a moment before you post.

fluffie · ‎02-15-2011

On 9/18/2014 mstyrion said:
On 9/18/2014 fluffie said:
ALL of the women I have seen interviewed on this topic (sadly, they are all African American) condone and use physical violence to discipline their young children. And yes, I consider taking any object to beat anyone as violent. They all say that it is the "Southern" way and they had it done to them as children. I have never hit my dog much less a child.

your post is appalling.

I am Caucasian and I was hit with a belt when I was a child. I am not from the South.

Maybe you should just stop and think for a moment before you post.

I certainly did not mean to offend. I do apologize if I worded it badly. I think the networks are interviewing a certain demographic which, yes, skews the result. I was never hit as a child but I certainly had playmates that were hit across the face with belts, etc. So your point is well taken.

QueenDanceALot · ‎04-18-2013

On 9/18/2014 NoelSeven said:
On 9/18/2014 brii said:
On 9/18/2014 KittyLouWhoToo said:
On 9/17/2014 occasional rain said:
On 9/17/2014 cody said:
On 9/17/2014 occasional rain said:
Last night NCIS happened to be on, it's not a show I watch so I don't know the names of the characters, and a woman punched her coworker in the stomach as she passed by. The thing is that had the male actor done the exact same thing to the woman, there would be letters of outrage.

In movies and on TV we see women throwing things at men, slapping and kicking them, and I wonder why that's seen as somehow acceptable. Why aren't they arrested and charged? Even in the Rice incident, there has been nothing condemning the woman's behavior. So why the double standard?

HUH???? Did she knock him out and drag him around unconscious like a piece of trash? What is wrong with you?

I could ask you the same. Somehow you only recognize abuse when it's happening to women but are blind to the abuse some woman commit. When a TV show condones a woman punching a man, whether or not he loses consciousness, there is something wrong with our society.

You continually hype what really happened. He dragged her out of the elevator the same way a fireman has been seen dragging an unconscious person out of harm's way. He didn't kick her as some have described it, he moved her feet so the elevator door wouldn't close on them with his foot. Should maybe have used his hands.

You can't be serious.

Really, you can't.

I think she just likes to play the role of contrarian. Nobody could defend how he dragged her out of an elevator by comparing it to a fireman dragging someone to safety.

Yes, there are people who do exactly that. They identify with the abusers.

Similar to those who like to minimize (although they insist they are not doing so) the violence perpetrated against women by men by saying "well, women are violent TOO"

goodstuff · ‎03-09-2010

More people in general are growing up in unstable family units, without effective parenting, without learning self control, without being taught responsibility, without learning manners or regard for others, and influenced by negative media, role models, and social milieu. They are easily frustrated, feel out of control, and haven't learned patience or respect for others.

Yes, I believe it.

QueenDanceALot · ‎04-18-2013

On 9/18/2014 GoodStuff said:
More people in general are growing up in unstable family units, without effective parenting, without learning self control, without being taught responsibility, without learning manners or regard for others, and influenced by negative media, role models, and social milieu. They are easily frustrated, feel out of control, and haven't learned patience or respect for others.

Yes, I believe it.

You make some good points.

There are so many more outside influences now that are virtually (in both senses) impossible for parents to counter.

Qwackertoo · ‎03-11-2010

On 9/18/2014 KittyLouWhoToo said:
To those who don't understand why a woman would stay and insist that they would leave if there were even an inkling that their man would be violent towards them I ask you to consider a woman who is with a man who has shown her love for a time and has earned her trust and then he starts to belittle, then he starts to grab, then maybe he throws you up against a wall, perhaps next time he grabs your throat and tells you he could kill you if he wanted to. Maybe you go to the "authorities" and maybe even you get a restraining order, but the man is still out there, and he's threatened your life. You never feel safe, no matter where you go.

Imagine a man who weighs twice as much as you hulking over you, telling you he'll kill you if you ever dare try to get away from him again. And no one is stopping him, not you certainly, and unfortunately, not the "authorities".

Do you still think it's so easy to just walk away?

I don't understand with first hand experience as I haven't walked in their shoes and I do feel greatly for them and double and triple my sympathies when they are trapped with children too and feel they can't escape for one reason or another.

While I don't think my husband of 23 years would ever lay a hand on me . . . and while I don't say this lightly . . . because I'm serious as a heart attack on a dead man . . . I have made it crystal clear from the get-go, many moons ago, that IF he were to ever lay a hand on me . . . he would wake up "dead" in the morning . . . and he's like "how can I wake up IF I'm dead" and I say exactly . . . "you won't". Again, I'm not making light of ANY woman's abuse . . . this is how "I" made it crystal clear. And I wouldn't care IF he made millions or we were poor as could be, I just couldn't or wouldn't live like that.

I remember, when I was very young, my aunt who's husband was in the Air Force, that she told how one of the officers where they were stationed would drink and beat his wife . . . while this was many, many years ago, I'll never forget . . . her telling how one night after he had beat her . . . she waited until he had passed out in the bed and took a needle and thread and sewed him up in the sheets . . . and then proceeded to beat the heck out of him with a baseball bat . . . can you imagine . . . waking up in a drunken stupor and sewed up in the sheets and someone beating you with a baseball bat . . . while I don't condone violence of ANY kind . . . can't say I'd blame her but I'd think a more "permanent" solution would be in order . . . anyways . . . hearing this story as relayed by my Aunt as a young child/girl . . . I decided right then & there I'd never live like that . . . BIG impression left on a young child . . . and now I don't even know IF it was a true story but I don't have reason to think or believe she'd think and make up a story like that out of thin air.

Another thing I don't claim to understand, at all, that happens all too often is a Mother allowing a boyfriend or step parent to abuse their children . . . HOW can they put them above their own child? I honestly don't understand that either . . . and I would retaliate in much the same manner as above . . . as in "he'd wake up dead" the next morning.

Miss Brenda Starr · ‎09-10-2014

I wouldn't be surprised if it's true. Stats show than 1 in 4 -- 25% -- of all American women have suffered some form of sexual abuse and I don't think physical abuse is far behind.