Re: Breastfeeding in public?

QueenDanceALot · ‎04-18-2013

I am all for breastfeeding your baby if you are able to. There are so many documented benefits.

HOWEVER, if you breastfeed in public I think it is best done discreetly, for everyone's comfort. It's not a sideshow, it's a private moment between a mother and child. For anyone to say that breasts aren't sexual, I've got bridge to sell you.

I work as a trainer in a private personal training studio. It's a small place, appointment only personal training, and I am a private contractor.

One day, late morning, I was wrapping up my last morning client and a young woman was there with her 5 week old baby who was in a baby rocker while she worked out with her trainer (who happened to be the owner of studio). The gym owner, a young man in his early 30's, would go over and rock the baby in the rocker whenever the baby started to fuss, and a few of us there went over to see the baby and goo goo over it a little.

Anyway, so everything is very nice, and the mother finishes her workout. I went to the restroom and when I went up to the front desk to get my coat and bag to leave, I was greeted by the young mother breastfeeding her infant right there next to the front desk. She'd been wearing a sports bra and tank and there was no coverage going on there. It kind of took me aback. I mean it's not something you see every day at the front desk of ANY business establishment, and I just kind of thought "whoa", but then just wished her a good day and said what a lovely baby and I left.

Next day when I was back at work I mentioned to the studio owner that this wasn't something you saw every day, and he said yeah, he was taken aback too, and just wished that she'd covered up. He had no problem with her breastfeeding there, I had no problem with it, but there is no reason why she couldn't have been more discreet.

After talking about this for a bit, after he ran this by friends of his, we all agreed that modesty would have been much more appropriate. And both the studio owner and I agree that the mother was enjoying the attention and how people noticed her very ample breasts.

In our culture, where breasts are indeed sexualized (as they are in many cultures, after all - to one degree or another), some common sense is in order, IMO. Sometimes adhering to cultural norms is a good thing, a sensible and pragmatic thing to do. And there is no harm done to either the mother or the baby by requesting some decorum by covering and being discreet.

(But throwing a tissue at someone isn't exactly the way to facilitate this!)

Johnnyeager · ‎09-05-2014

Complete and total solipsistic behavior with no regard for anyone else at work....(in my opinion).

CatsyCline · ‎07-24-2013

the Laleche League exists because of negative, ignorent and puritanical attitudes towards a natural biological function. People in the US are extremely uncomfortable with bodies and body parts.

Everything has been sexualized in our society. Its OK to have a Victorias Secret Fashion show on prime time TV with multiple silicone breasts on parade, periously nigh to nipple slips. That is deemed appropriate for all ages including blushing pre-pubescent boys. But a nursing breast - oh, that requires public flogging. the Hussey. How dare she.

cherry · ‎03-09-2010

Don't think everyones kids watches Victoria Secrets shows because they don't..

Trinity11 · ‎11-16-2014

@CatsyCline wrote:
the Laleche League exists because of negative, ignorent and puritanical attitudes towards a natural biological function. People in the US are extremely uncomfortable with bodies and body parts.

Everything has been sexualized in our society. Its OK to have a Victorias Secret Fashion show on prime time TV with multiple silicone breasts on parade, periously nigh to nipple slips. That is deemed appropriate for all ages including blushing pre-pubescent boys. But a nursing breast - oh, that requires public flogging. the Hussey. How dare she.

These attitudes are deep rooted and clearly nothing is going to change. Plenty of kids go to R rated movies...I have often seen them in movie theaters accompanied by mom and dad but breastfeeding is unacceptable to these same folks. Better cover up.

Yes, we are a nation of mixed messages.

stevieb · ‎03-10-2010

@Johnnyeager wrote:
There's a certain air of militancy to women who desire to do this in public as part of an agenda. And a lot of solipsism.

Well stated @Johnnyeager.

In my pantry with my cupcakes...

San Antonio Gal · ‎05-18-2017

@QueenDanceALot- Good example of someone who should have placed a blanket over the child instead of enjoying the attention - as you stated.

I don't see anything wrong with nursing in public, but I think covering up is necessary.

stevieb · ‎03-10-2010

@QueenDanceALot wrote:
I am all for breastfeeding your baby if you are able to. There are so many documented benefits.

HOWEVER, if you breastfeed in public I think it is best done discreetly, for everyone's comfort. It's not a sideshow, it's a private moment between a mother and child. For anyone to say that breasts aren't sexual, I've got bridge to sell you.

I work as a trainer in a private personal training studio. It's a small place, appointment only personal training, and I am a private contractor.

One day, late morning, I was wrapping up my last morning client and a young woman was there with her 5 week old baby who was in a baby rocker while she worked out with her trainer (who happened to be the owner of studio). The gym owner, a young man in his early 30's, would go over and rock the baby in the rocker whenever the baby started to fuss, and a few of us there went over to see the baby and goo goo over it a little.

Anyway, so everything is very nice, and the mother finishes her workout. I went to the restroom and when I went up to the front desk to get my coat and bag to leave, I was greeted by the young mother breastfeeding her infant right there next to the front desk. She'd been wearing a sports bra and tank and there was no coverage going on there. It kind of took me aback. I mean it's not something you see every day at the front desk of ANY business establishment, and I just kind of thought "whoa", but then just wished her a good day and said what a lovely baby and I left.

Next day when I was back at work I mentioned to the studio owner that this wasn't something you saw every day, and he said yeah, he was taken aback too, and just wished that she'd covered up. He had no problem with her breastfeeding there, I had no problem with it, but there is no reason why she couldn't have been more discreet.

After talking about this for a bit, after he ran this by friends of his, we all agreed that modesty would have been much more appropriate. And both the studio owner and I agree that the mother was enjoying the attention and how people noticed her very ample breasts.

In our culture, where breasts are indeed sexualized (as they are in many cultures, after all - to one degree or another), some common sense is in order, IMO. Sometimes adhering to cultural norms is a good thing, a sensible and pragmatic thing to do. And there is no harm done to either the mother or the baby by requesting some decorum by covering and being discreet.

(But throwing a tissue at someone isn't exactly the way to facilitate this!)

@QueenDanceALot Wow... Fully exposed feeding at the front desk in front of the male instructor. I'm sorry but I'm afraid in this instance, at least, there was more going on than merely a hungry baby. Again, I'll not be convinced there wasn't some effort here to either flaunt her 'right' or possibly, to flaunt her anatomy... There was more than likely somewhere in that establishment she might have opted to go, but it appears, based on what you're saying, that she actively chose a very public display... Folks can defend her 'right' until the the cows come home... but the reality is at least a modicum of discretion is almost always a preferable route to take...

In my pantry with my cupcakes...