Beauty

[KaySD]

...and, @just bee, bats in the ......

[KaySD]

Let me see if I understand, @just bee. You have boxes and boxes of useless VHS tapes, but your BH is removing pictures from the walls? I'm having trouble imagining this. 

[KaySD]

@just bee

Justifiable June!

[KaySD]

@DelaRose, your post made me laugh. Wryly. 

The only solution is to start getting rid of cabinets and drawers and baskets, and other places to put things. Then pretty soon you have to get a smaller place to live so you have fewer closets and storage areas. Where does it end?

But seriously, how does one define what's a comfortable level of stuff to own, given that each of us is a bit different? 

[aprilskies]

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@just bee wrote:

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@aprilskies wrote:

@just bee - how is your decluttering going?

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@aprilskies

It was starting to get a little tense around here.  Every time I came home from work more of my things were in the donation pile.  I don't support the removal of framed art.

So I did what I do when I feel like I'm being pushed.  I dig in my heels and resist.  I had been clearing out closets and then when BH started taking down all the art and nagging, I stopped everything.

He backed off a little and yesterday we loaded the back of his truck and took a ton of stuff to Animal Humane.  I even pulled three leather bombers out of the hall closet.

But there were a couple days when I was going to make like he was a baby seal and club him.

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@just bee. LOL.   I do agree, decluttering is good but now when one partner is not on board with certain things. Where is that club?

Having said that though, I can understand where your BH is coming from. I went through that myself. I removed all of the things off of the walls except a few things.  Was that smart? ..no.  But, my intention was to get new things that I really loved but I never had the inclination to start the process of looking and doing. .   And because I do want to move one day, I didnt want to move a ton of extra stuff either.   So, my walls are looking a bit bare.   At one point, I even wanted to get rid of all of my furniture. lol.  I never liked my living room set and my bedroom set I have had for over 30 some years.  I can get a bit crazy, I admit.  I will say, I do wish I had someone like your BH around.  I am not necessarily attached to stuff, but what remains are the harder decisions that I have not tackled well. But, I am beginning too slowly.

I will spare you all of my deep soul motivations, but I think part of it for me is mental. How do I want to spend my next 30 years (if blessed) and what do I want to be surrounded by?  It is just important to me for a whole host of reasons.

[just bee]

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@DelaRose wrote:

It is freeing when you get things out of the house.  This past weekend our community sponsored a free recycle day.  I actually got Hubby to help me get some things out of the house.  I took 3 analog TVs (one was 130 lbs), 2 printers, 1 desktop computer, 1 laptop.  I also took an Xbox that had the red ring from years ago that was no good and as I was carrying it out of the house Hubby was still claiming he could fix it.  Oh, did I give you the impression that it was easy??  Ha Ha.  It wasn't fun and games.  Hubby complained the whole time something about wasted $$, blah blah.......  I have reconized that I am a hoarder, but Hubby is 10x worse.  At least he did help me load up the truck, but refused to go with me to actually get rid of the stuff.  The problem with this scenrio is that you open up space in your home, but when everyone in the home is not on board it actually just leaves you with more room to store more stuff.  I will be watching this and not let more things get accumluated in the now emptied spaces.  It's baby steps.      

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@DelaRose

This makes me feel better about disposing of two perfectly good TV sets.  I still can't believe how many phones we keep finding...

[just bee]

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@aprilskies wrote:

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  I will say, I do wish I had someone like your BH around. 

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@aprilskies

He's all yours.  Where shall I send him?

[just bee]

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@KaySD wrote:

...and, @just bee, bats in the ......

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@KaySD

Is that anything like mourning doves on the ladder?

[aprilskies]

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@just bee wrote:

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@aprilskies wrote:

In that moment, I could see the beauty of minimalism.  And by minimalism,  i dont mean, owning 50 things only and everything being white. But, less things, loved or needed, but it their place. 

Will this aha moment last, I dont know, but I do need to get serious if I ever want to have my environment as I want it.

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@aprilskies

It has to be something you want to do, not something you think you should do.

I'm looking at the wall where we had, for years, a framed print.  I liked it and I liked the way it "made" that corner of the room.  It matched everything.  It just worked.

But BH wanted it gone and, since it was his, it went.  Does that corner look better?  No, not at all.  I just don't see the point.

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@just bee, yes, this is certainly something I want to do and is important to me.  My decluttering doesnt stem from the recent craze over the last few years. It really goes back over a decade ago. 

Yes, thank you, I am feeling better.  The interesting part of my incident was the fact that I was instantly hit with such an overwhelming feeling of "too much stuff."  I think I just get cluttered surfaces and it starts to affect me.  But I cant seem for the life of me, keep my surfaces clear of the clutter. It just accumulates.  

But, yes, framed art and such should be a joint decisions. VHS tapes would be a toss and go thing.    I got rid of those a few years ago during my last major declutter along with my high end barely used vhs player.   That was painful.  It was quite a collection of disney movies too. But i was not using any of it and it takes up a lot of space.

Anyway, I hope your BH is still breathing.

[aprilskies]

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@just bee wrote:

@aprilskies

Hope your back is feeling better.  Nothing like an injury or illness to change your perspective.  I sometimes imagine the worst and try to picture one of us needing EMS to come in with a gurney.  It's not that the house is that crowded.  It's what my mother saw when I showed her the house plan.

She thought there were too many weird angles in the house.  That and long narrow halls.

Right now we're trying to figure out how to get a heavy wall unit out of the house.  I like it, it works and I don't want to see it go.  BH hates it and has it in pieces.

At this point he doesn't want to donate it -- he wants it in landfill.

I'm still not seeing the point.

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@just bee, interesting that he doesnt want to donate that instead of it ending up in the landfill.  Is it just too heavy to deal with.

I almost got rid of the top half of mine but decided to keep it for now.  I was in the phase of not wanting so much heavy looking furniture around. I really am in a weird phase with stuff right now.  I think that is why I slowed my roll.  I dont want to toss the baby with the bath water.  I think I will start the more difficult decisions if I am ever able to move.