Re: Retirement Party Invitation

chickenbutt · ‎03-09-2010

I agree with most that 'no gift' means NO GIFT! No wrapped present, no bottle of wine, no ANYTHING. To disrespect that is selfish.

(using the term 'you' in the generic sense) When you insist upon disrespecting their request and bring a gift you are making it about YOU! Just stop that. It's wrong. You show up with a gift like 'here I am with a gift because I'm a better person'. Nope! You are disrespectful.

I like the idea one poster mentioned about sending a 'congratulations' card in the mail. That's nice and it's not disrespecting their wish for people to not bring anything. It's not necessary, as your attendance is the 'congrats', but at least it's not offensive like bringing a gift to a no gift party and making some of the others feel bad like maybe they should have brought a gift too, etc. That's just creepy.

sunshine45 · ‎03-09-2010

@Melvin-QVC wrote:
@staciesmom wrote:
DH and I are invited to a colleague's retirement party this Sunday, and the invitation states "No gifts please". He is very dear to both of us and I really don't want to go empty-handed. I thought about getting a nice card to express our congratulations, but it doesn't seem right. Any advice? TIA
@staciesmom IMHO I would think if they specifically stated "no gifts" they probably have all they need or want and your presence is their present. However, I don't like to go anywhere empty handed and would atleast bring a bottle of some sort, just because.

@Melvin-QVC

i am the same way. i usually cannot NOT take something small...... a bottle of wine, a box of candies or cookies, maybe even a gift card to their favorite restaurant placed inside the card.

********************************************
"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

Good grief, honor the man's wishes and don't bring a gift. He specifically state no gifts, so it's no brainer. A card with a personal message would be a nice thing to do. What doesn't seem right to you??? There people in this world who like to celebrate the events of their life but they neither need nor want gifts. I've been to many celebrations that have something like "the honor of your presense is the only gift we want" on the invitation.

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

@sunshine45 wrote:
@Melvin-QVC wrote:
@staciesmom wrote:
DH and I are invited to a colleague's retirement party this Sunday, and the invitation states "No gifts please". He is very dear to both of us and I really don't want to go empty-handed. I thought about getting a nice card to express our congratulations, but it doesn't seem right. Any advice? TIA
@staciesmom IMHO I would think if they specifically stated "no gifts" they probably have all they need or want and your presence is their present. However, I don't like to go anywhere empty handed and would atleast bring a bottle of some sort, just because.

@Melvin-QVC

i am the same way. i usually cannot NOT take something small...... a bottle of wine, a box of candies or cookies, maybe even a gift card to their favorite restaurant placed inside the card.

So, it's all about YOU and not about the guest of honor??? You just ignore their wishes and give them the burden of deciding what to do and how to dispose of the "stuff" they didn't want to begin with....lol

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@chickenbutt wrote:
I agree with most that 'no gift' means NO GIFT! No wrapped present, no bottle of wine, no ANYTHING. To disrespect that is selfish.

(using the term 'you' in the generic sense) When you insist upon disrespecting their request and bring a gift you are making it about YOU! Just stop that. It's wrong. You show up with a gift like 'here I am with a gift because I'm a better person'. Nope! You are disrespectful.

I like the idea one poster mentioned about sending a 'congratulations' card in the mail. That's nice and it's not disrespecting their wish for people to not bring anything. It's not necessary, as your attendance is the 'congrats', but at least it's not offensive like bringing a gift to a no gift party and making some of the others feel bad like maybe they should have brought a gift too, etc. That's just creepy.

@chickenbutt You said exactly what I think about all of this! BRAVO!!! Yes. It is making the gift about you!

sunshine45 · ‎03-09-2010

@chrystaltree wrote:
@sunshine45 wrote:
@Melvin-QVC wrote:
@staciesmom wrote:
DH and I are invited to a colleague's retirement party this Sunday, and the invitation states "No gifts please". He is very dear to both of us and I really don't want to go empty-handed. I thought about getting a nice card to express our congratulations, but it doesn't seem right. Any advice? TIA
@staciesmom IMHO I would think if they specifically stated "no gifts" they probably have all they need or want and your presence is their present. However, I don't like to go anywhere empty handed and would atleast bring a bottle of some sort, just because.

@Melvin-QVC

i am the same way. i usually cannot NOT take something small...... a bottle of wine, a box of candies or cookies, maybe even a gift card to their favorite restaurant placed inside the card.

So, it's all about YOU and not about the guest of honor??? You just ignore their wishes and give them the burden of deciding what to do and how to dispose of the "stuff" they didn't want to begin with....lol

@chrystaltree

that is just the way i am......

now, if someone were truly offended by me bringing something then i would venture to guess that i would no longer be invited to their homes or their events OR they would say something to me about it.

it has not happened so far and i dont anticipate it happening either.

i am surely not the only one that does this, not by a long shot.

i have said no gifts on invitations often, but i definitely NEVER make the person who brought the gift feel badly. why?......because they are my friend and i know that it is not meant in a bad way at all.

********************************************
"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein

chi5925 · ‎03-09-2010

@Shanus wrote:
Isn’t it sweet to have the mods read/reply to our comments? Go Melvin QVC. 👌🏻

No, I don't think it's "sweet" that a QVC moderator posts his/her personal comments to a thread.

Doing that blurs the line between the customers (posters) and the moderators. Moderators may then find it either difficult or too easy to remove a thread or ban a poster or remove a comment if they get friendly with posters.

Their job is to monitor the Boards objectively and not be conversational pals with us.

JMO

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@chickenbutt wrote:
I agree with most that 'no gift' means NO GIFT! No wrapped present, no bottle of wine, no ANYTHING. To disrespect that is selfish.

(using the term 'you' in the generic sense) When you insist upon disrespecting their request and bring a gift you are making it about YOU! Just stop that. It's wrong. You show up with a gift like 'here I am with a gift because I'm a better person'. Nope! You are disrespectful.

I like the idea one poster mentioned about sending a 'congratulations' card in the mail. That's nice and it's not disrespecting their wish for people to not bring anything. It's not necessary, as your attendance is the 'congrats', but at least it's not offensive like bringing a gift to a no gift party and making some of the others feel bad like maybe they should have brought a gift too, etc. That's just creepy.

I agree with you for the most part. However, I don't see anything wrong with bringing a bottle of wine or something as a hostess gift if the party is in someone's home. It's not a retirement gift - It's a small thank-you for the host or hostess, whoever that may be. (Maybe the man's daughter? A friend?) I wouldn't do that if the party was in a restaurant or similar venue. For me, it's the same as going to someone's home for a non-special occasion dinner. I never go to someone's home for dinner or a party empty-handed.

I agree with you about all the rest, though. "No gifts" means "no gifts", and I certainly wouldn't walk in to a party with a gift for the guest of honor if that request had been made. It makes perfect sense to me that someone might just want to have people celebrate with him, and nothing more than their company and good wishes.

eta: Just going off on a rant about the wine because I had mentioned possibly bringing wine or something similar upthread yesterday. :-)

sissel · ‎08-13-2010

I can't help myself I am a giver, on this situation I would go to dollar tree & get a balloon it's done in 2 days just fun, I can afford a dollar. I would probably if I knew who was going say we just get 1 balloon when we enter as a fun crazy gift. get all balloons to make a bunch plus a card with some saying congrats on this special day. It's nice the family wants a retirement little party and they laugh & enjoy. It's about support and happiness for the retired person.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@chi5925 wrote:
@Shanus wrote:
Isn’t it sweet to have the mods read/reply to our comments? Go Melvin QVC. 👌🏻

No, I don't think it's "sweet" that a QVC moderator posts his/her personal comments to a thread.

Doing that blurs the line between the customers (posters) and the moderators. Moderators may then find it either difficult or too easy to remove a thread or ban a poster or remove a comment if they get friendly with posters.

Their job is to monitor the Boards objectively and not be conversational pals with us.

JMO

When the mods speak, they are the voice of QVC and their opinions become QVCs opinions. Yep, that's the way it works when you work for someone or a company. What you say on the job is no longer your thought.