Re: Retirement Party Invitation

GCR18 · ‎07-03-2013

A card with a personal note will do it. No gift.

homedecor1 · ‎03-09-2010

I'm agreeing with what others have stated "no gifts" means no gifts, but, a nice card with your sentiments would be perfect!

I had a very close friend who was very well financially (president of oil company before retirement). His daughter decided to have a big 80th party for him & the invites clearly stated "no gifts as your presence and friendship are his gift" (or something to this).

There were 100 people invited. Of course, he was not happy (vs. ungrateful) people brought "gifts" because he had everything! He decided to donate gift cards. He gave the gc for restaurants, movies, etc. to our local shelter for women with children. Other things were donated to hospice thrift store. The booze & wine he gave away to friends.

What I can tell you he must really had loved the cards & sentiments because he kept them in a box which we found when cleaning out his home when he passed.

I personally think the wishes of the recipient should be followed.

Ifeelwicked · ‎06-03-2012

How about a beautiful card, including a personal sentiment, left unsealed. That way when you show up and there’s a table full of “non gifts” you can tuck the restaurant or bookstore gift card inside that you stuck in your wallet “just in case.” 😆

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@staciesmom wrote:
DH and I are invited to a colleague's retirement party this Sunday, and the invitation states "No gifts please". He is very dear to both of us and I really don't want to go empty-handed. I thought about getting a nice card to express our congratulations, but it doesn't seem right. Any advice? TIA

For a colleague who has requested no gifts, I would give a card with some meaningful and heartfelt words handwritten inside.

For a colleague who is also a friend, I would do the same, but would also invite him out to lunch or dinner in a few weeks to celebrate.

In both cases, if the party was in someone's home (rather than a restaurant or banquet hall), I might bring a bottle of wine or something similar as a hostess gift.

In my experience, when people say "no gifts", they mean it.

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@Q4u wrote:
@jackthebear wrote:
might get some disagrees here, but this is still a gift requiring a thank you note. and if it is not his charity and you pick yours that is a gift to you from you ( general you ) not Q4U.

I think it is important to respect the wishes of the invitor  in all these instances and not do what we want or what we would like to receive.
I respectfully disagree. When you make a donation in someone's name, it takes on a specific meaning. Perhaps a note at the bottom of the card that a thank you note is not expected or required..... it can be done.

If someone made a donation in my name, I would definitely send a note, no matter what was written at the bottom of the card.

But I don't think having to write thank you notes is the reason some people specify "no gifts". They want people to just come and enjoy themselves without it turning into a chore. I can understand feeling that way, and I'm sure that's the motivation a lot of the time.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

It amazes me how hard it is for people to do something others ask them to do.

How would YOU feel if you asked people to do (or not do) something and they just disregarded what you said? If they said "no gifts" don't bring a gift of ANY kind. A card yes, a gift NO.

CelticCrafter · ‎03-09-2010

The one thing I don't agree with is making a donation to a charity in a persons name.

If it's a charity they support and you don't, you will be forever receiving requests for another donation. If you make a donation to your favorite charity in their name, they will be on the list for more donations.

Even when it comes to "in lieu of flowers" - I will put a check in the sympathy card and let the family decide what they want to use it for.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@CelticCrafter wrote:
The one thing I don't agree with is making a donation to a charity in a persons name.

If it's a charity they support and you don't, you will be forever receiving requests for another donation. If you make a donation to your favorite charity in their name, they will be on the list for more donations.

Even when it comes to "in lieu of flowers" - I will put a check in the sympathy card and let the family decide what they want to use it for.

I hate charity donations for gifts! To me it says you don't need a gift or you are too stupid to decide what to do with a gift. I just think it is presumptious to decide where to donate for someone. But that's just me.

It also means someone else gets your tax deduction!

wagirl · ‎03-09-2010

Agree about just a nice card but maybe put in an invitation for a dinner out with you at a later date. Maybe bring a nice plant or flowers from your garden. Not a fan of bringing booze either. I wouldn't want that personally.

beckyb1012 · ‎03-09-2010

I know when I have put this on invites it is truly what I mean. Nothing means nothing. Just go and enjoy and celebrate with them. They want to relax after working everyday for decades, not worry about writing thank you cards in the next couple of weeks.

"Live frugally, but love extravagantly."