Reply
Honored Contributor
Posts: 30,239
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

You know I've been thinking of this thing called 'over sharing'.

 

These days I'm convinced a surprising number of people are actually (for want of a better word) STARVING for one on one conversations.

 

Everywhere I go, I talk to people, all strangers.  They might spend 5 or 10 minutes talking to me about a huge variety of things!  They tell me some details I'm not sure they'd tell other's.  

 

Just today I went to pay my 1/2 year taxes on my house.  I enjoy going to the place because I spend a minute or two talking to the ladies there.

 

The lady behind the desk was there by herself.  No one was in line (today is the last day to pay them).  I was very surprised.  

 

I always wait to pay things so the money (it's a lot) can draw interest.  

 

I asked where everyone was and she said they'd all taken leave at the same time.  She was pleasant but I could tell she needed to vent a little.  She told me about how she'd just been promoted, she was going on vacation and how it's been some time since she's seen some family members and on and on.  

 

I really enjoyed the interaction between the two of us.  She said that with the economy so good the place where I lived had hired many more people and we talked about that.

 

My point?  Well, I've always spent time talking with people.  I just feel like everyone has a story (that's what I call it....a story).

 

I don't impose myself on others, but I've found it's very easy to strike up conversations everywhere.  I do it at the grocery store....everywhere.

 

My daughter has been visiting from Denver for a month.  She drove here with her dog.  She's an adventurer like her Dad.  We traveled everywhere when he was alive.  My oldest daughter (her sister) is also like that.  They've been all over the world with their 4 children.

 

Anyway, I've come to the point where I do not like the word over-sharing.  I see people sitting at a table in a restaurant....they're all on their phones.  No one is talking at all...

 

My question is, why bother meeting with someone if you aren't going to visit with them.

 

My husband died suddenly in my arms.  He'd never been sick and was in incredible shape.  He was only 58 years old.  The autopsy never found what he died from.

 

There were no unspoken words when he died.  We loved each other (we'd been married since we were almost 19 years old) for 38 years.

 

You never know when someone is going to die.  I don't call it 'pass' I call it die.  I know he's in Heaven and that's good enough for me...

 

Anyway, what are some of your feelings on this?  I'm curious.  I always say, "I've never met a stranger".

 

I've met some amazing, kind people.  People who've probably gone into a store and never talked to anyone.  Most people walk with their heads down, don't make eye-contact.  

 

I do make eye-contact.  Maybe that's why we spend a few minutes talking about things.  Just recently, I had a conversation with an African American lady.  I was standing looking at the nail polish.  We started talking.  She mentioned she was frustrated about how grey her eyebrows were.  I talked to her about what I used (Two-Face brow stuff).  Then we talking about the pencils they had there.  From there she told me about her family and how they weren't getting along and so on and so on.

 

I know I'll never see her again.  We we talked and when she left we hugged each other good-bye.  

 

I mentioned she was African American because we actually talked about problems with our hair.  I've mentioned here before I wea a wig.  I told her that.  She said her hair is dry and breaks off.  She said that's a problem some African American women have.  I told her about Wen and how there are ladies on QVC that swear by what it does for their hair.  She said she'd look into QVC and Wen.

 

Just things like that.  So, if you want to be my friend, don't talk to me about 'over-sharing'.  I don't know what that word means.

 

My daughter's get a kick out of me.  They're used to me talking to people.  Just yesterday I was at a restaurant with my youngest (visiting here).  We talked to the waitress about how she should visit Denver and on and on.  She was delightful.  We kept saying, "We'll let you go".  She responded, "No!  I never take a break".  This is my break and I love talking to you guys.

 

So there you go.  You never know some nut like me might come up to you and talk for 2-5 or so minutes and be on my way.

 

I've walked past people (women) and if they look like they've spent an extra few minutes before they left the house.  I'll not stop walking but I'll turn and say, "You look really nice today".  And they really did.  You can see them straighten up.  

 

Always greet someone with a smile and they'll smile back.  It doesn't take much to offer up a smile.  It might be the only smile they get that day.

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,837
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

[ Edited ]

@Annabellethecat66   I'm sure you're enjoying the visit with your daughter.  How are Bill and Katie getting along with her dog?  I've forgotten what kind of dog she has if you don't mind telling me.


The Bluebird Carries The Sky On His Back"
-Henry David Thoreau





Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,536
Registered: ‎05-27-2014

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

My mom and youngest sister were alot like you. They never met a stranger. My sister used to say that she should have gone into psychiatry because within 10 minutes after first meeting someone she had heard their entire life story. They were the life of any party, very outgoing. I am more reserved. I would rather be like you, @Annabellethecat66, TBH.

 

dee

Valued Contributor
Posts: 952
Registered: ‎05-09-2010

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

I so enjoyed your post.  It reminded me of myself.  I do believe if you smile people do feel  you are approachable and stop to say a few words.  When my children were young when I stopped and spoke to someone they asked me, “do you know her?”  I guess I haven’t changed much because my grandchildren ask me that same question.  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,702
Registered: ‎08-22-2013

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

I notice that the elderly are the ones who strike up a conversation, not the young people. I'm lucky, my husband is still alive and we do just about everything together and he's a talker.LOL I have elderly men come up to me in Walmart and start a conversation and my husband is standing right next to me. Elderly women will start up a conversation in line at the check out or at the pharmacy. The elderly are lonely.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,451
Registered: ‎07-15-2016

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

I wouldn't call it over-sharing.  I enjoy chatting with people. 

 

In supermarkets, sitting in the park, etc.  I can't count the number of times I stood in the supermarket aisle talking with someone I never saw before.

 

I live in NYC in a large residential area of Manhattan.  Here everyone talks to each other!  Sounds odd for NYC, doesn't it.   It's really like a small town around here.    

 

One woman - about 10 years older than me - was leaving Church after Mass and we were both waiting for the light to change to cross the street ... we struck up a conversation (turns out she lives in the building around the corner from me - we walked home together) ... now we know each other's names, backgrounds, etc., etc.  Everytime we pass on the street - we stop and chat.  

 

Jury Duty is a prime place for conversation.  For a few days we have a "best friend" to share with and then we're dismissed and we've gone our separate ways.  I've had really great fellow jurors!

 

On public transit is another prime opportunity for conversation.  

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,071
Registered: ‎04-14-2018

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

@Annabellethecat66 You are kind and an excellent listener.

You draw people to you .

I believe you are a blessing to many.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,445
Registered: ‎05-15-2016

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

I’m very circumspect about sharing my life story online or irl. I don’t think people are that interested. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,024
Registered: ‎05-23-2015

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!


@GenXmuse wrote:

I’m very circumspect about sharing my life story online or irl. I don’t think people are that interested. 


@GenXmuse , I’m an introvert and I find talking to strangers awkward and painful. My BFF is just the opposite and that is great. We are all different and that is fine.

" You are entitled to your opinion. But you are not entitled to your own facts."
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Honored Contributor
Posts: 19,413
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Over Sharing ----Or Not!

@Annabellethecat66  you are a sweetheart. I'm the exact opposite of you. I'm introverted and while I try to be pleasant with cashiers and bag boys, I don't strike up conversations. If I told you how difficult that is for me, you'd probably think utter nonsense, anyone can start a conversation. No so for me.