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Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎07-03-2013

I think I would feel hurt if I had been close to the groom as he was growing up.  I have some friends where I gave their kids Christmas presents every year until they grew up.  I can totally understand costs and cutting back, but would expect my friend to tell me that.  If she didn't, I'd feel dissed.

Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎09-01-2010

With the attitude I have about formal weddings, I would be thrilled I was not invited.   

Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎03-10-2010

I hope the one friend who's husband knows the groom (whom are invited) doesn't brag about the event, when you 5 ladies get together.

Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎03-25-2012

We couldn't invite any cousins to any of my daughters' weddings because there were 26 on one side and 14 on the other, and many of them had spouses or SOs.  Everyone understood and many had to do the same thing.

Formerly Ford1224
We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Elie Wiesel 1986
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Posts: 324
Registered: ‎04-17-2010

OP...YEP to your original question!

Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@Momofdogs

 

yes I think you should be as a friend of 30 years BUT it's the bride/groom wedding and they invite who they want.

 

I'm sure the brides parents have set a budget/limit what they plan to spend. Which makes sense why you may not be invited. 

 

when my son married we were allowed 10 guests (outside of family) and we paid for our additional guests. We felt that was the right thing to do since we had a lot of close friends. 

 

Wedding costs are outrageous and they maybe on limited budget.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Honored Contributor
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@Momofdogs wrote:

Thank you for all your replies. As far as I know , my friend mentioned the bride to be had more guests , due to the size of her family and my friend mentioned that her side of the family is small. There are 5 of us that get together on birthdays, dinners, lunch, day trips and I even went on vacation with my friend who is the mother of the groom. I found out that one of the 5 friends did get invited, due to the fact her husband is a friend also of the groom. I'll get over it, and I won't let this ruin my relationship with my friend, but I did tend to put up a tiny wall around our friendship, for now. I had another friend whose daughter got married and that friend paid for a few close friends place settings, she wanted us there. Thanks again for your replies


I think that you would consider this such an insult to put up a "tiny wall" speaks volumes about the friendship. . . 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,648
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

I don't see anything unusual about it.   Wouldn't the kids invite who THEY want to invite?  Anything beyond that is just a gift grab, IMO.

 

I wouldn't take that against your friend, the parent.    It's the kids' wedding, not theirs.

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Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎03-10-2010

I would be a tad hurt about not being invited but would get over it.  As far as putting up a small wall around their friendship that's understandable, we don't know their situation, might be different if we were in her shoes and her feelings. 

 

@Momofdogs, everything will smooth over and be fine.  Heck when my best friends son was getting married we were de-invited due to turmoil between families and I loathed how they used and treated her..  We had a huge laugh over it plus saved us on a wedding gift.  

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Registered: ‎08-23-2010

@Momofdogs wrote:

Thank you for all your replies. As far as I know , my friend mentioned the bride to be had more guests , due to the size of her family and my friend mentioned that her side of the family is small. There are 5 of us that get together on birthdays, dinners, lunch, day trips and I even went on vacation with my friend who is the mother of the groom. I found out that one of the 5 friends did get invited, due to the fact her husband is a friend also of the groom. I'll get over it, and I won't let this ruin my relationship with my friend, but I did tend to put up a tiny wall around our friendship, for now. I had another friend whose daughter got married and that friend paid for a few close friends place settings, she wanted us there. Thanks again for your replies


@Momofdogs

 

I'm not familiar with this saying .... does this mean you thought that the two of you were especially close, and you'd automatically be invited?