Re: Not Invited

Lilysmom · ‎03-09-2010

I tried to have a very small wedding and even at that there were more than 50 people. That included just family and a few friends. Don't be upset about that, especially if it was her son's wedding. The men tend to sit more on the sidelines than the women in planning.

Don't lose a good friend over this. Absolutely not necessary. LM

Deb1010yetagain · ‎12-09-2013

Don't take it personally. It's a decision based on cost and certain cut offs had to be made. Be gracious and don't let it ruin your friendship.

Lovingq · ‎03-09-2010

@Deb1010yetagain wrote:
Don't take it personally. It's a decision based on cost and certain cut offs had to be made. Be gracious and don't let it ruin your friendship.

People need to downsize - change the venue - and live within their means so everyone can be invited. I'm always shocked how some rationalize their abhorrent behavior dissing people they supposedly care about and then wonder why those that they have offended want nothing more to do with you.

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

No, you should not feel bad or be offended. As a mom of one married daughter and the mom of a daughter who is in the middle of planning a "commitment" ceremony with her long time boyfriend; I can tell you that we are forced to leave many people that we love off the guest list. Weddings are expensive today and it's not the parents' wedding. It's the couple's wedding and their friends come first. As it should. Ask any parent who has married children, it's just the way it is.

lovethgedress · ‎07-12-2012

Wow, surprised by all the judgemental answers on here. I understand being disappointed by not being invited but without knowing all the detais of the guestlist I would not jump to conclusions as to why you were not invited. If this is a close friend I would discuss with her rather than letting it ruin your friendship. Agree with the other responses that nowadays weddings are much smaller and if paid for by the couple themselves, odds are they are not inviting friends of their parents.

My daughter is getting married this July and while we did invite a few close friends that our daughter is close to, there were many others that we could not invite. Remember this is not your friend's wedding, it is her son's.

missy1 · ‎03-10-2010

Don't send a gift. Did you ask your friend why?

Dominosmom · ‎07-17-2010

happened to me too about 4 years ago...had to tell second cousins and my friends that the invitations were for basically immediate family, my son was the groom, her family was paying the bill and the venue wasn't very big. Funny now the newly weds are shopping for their first home and they confided that they wish they hadn't spend so much on the reception, could have used that money for the down payment. My lips were sealed tight on that one. Lol

Sawn · ‎03-17-2010

OP, I totally understand your feelings. I've been there. My best friend since high school didn't invite me to her son's wedding. I didn't invite her to my daughter's wedding, either. In the first case, it was a financial reason, which I won't go into details on. I understood, though. In the second case, my daughter and her husband made a pact that no one they didn't both know would be at their very small, intimate wedding. I will say, though, that we each explained to the other why invitations weren't going out.

ValuSkr · ‎03-15-2014

@Moretofollow wrote:
@Momofdogs wrote:
Should I be upset if a close friend I've known for over 30 yrs didn't invite me to her sons wedding ?
If I was dissed by a close friend of 30 years I'd forego a present as well as a gift for their baby when they have one. If you were not important enough in their eyes to attend their wedding, then they don't need your money or your thoughtfulness in choosing a gift for them. And, sadly they will remember that you didn't get them a gift but not that you were not invited to their wedding party....that's how that works these days.

Yes, be thankful you didn't have to get a gift.

eyeron · ‎01-11-2015

I don't think the OP gave enough information. Is it a big or small wedding and are there a limited amount of people going? Who's paying for the wedding? Are there other friends that were invited and not you? (Maybe just one or two of her very best friends are going...or those who are close to the couple)

I personally wouldn't be upset if I weren't invited.... unless I found out MANY of our mutual friends were invited and I wasn't. (But, then again...I don't understand why that would happen) But I know weddings are expensive and usually have a limited amount of people invited. (Mostly family and friends of the bride and groom).