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Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,960
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Years ago it was time for Mom to sell her house and move closer to us. She was about 300 miles away. She told us when she was ready and we ( the family) did most of it. We set up an appt. w/a realtor's. Interviewed a few retirement communities and looked in to her finances. When the time came we moved her and her stuff here. We had already found a retirement home very near us (2 miles away) . We made sure she had all she wanted. Set her up w/a PCP. She already had a will. We did everything for her. Set up meds,paid bills,etc. She didn't like the first appartment, so we moved her . Her one wish was that we were VERY nearby. We never fussed at her,just made sure she had all she wanted. Also made sure there was a bank in her RC. Then she moved again. Liked that much better. As an only child I had a lot of responsibility,but it was easier when she was just a few miles away. It was a lot of work,but easier because she was very nearby. I thank God for Hubbs  and my sons and their families,because we all did it together. When she passed at 98 years ,we took her home to be buried next to Daddy. 

I have peace of mind.

Contributor
Posts: 62
Registered: ‎06-04-2014

Such a good family story!  Well done!!!  

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,277
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Being nearby makes a huge difference!  You did the best that you could and it sounds like she was happy after her second move.

 

My mother refused to move up near us in PA.  She stayed in her Florida condo until the end.  The last couple of years she couldn't do it on her own and had  aides working full time for her and in the last year living with her round the clock.  

 

It was much more difficult for us with her so far away but she had aides that she liked a lot and they took good care of her which was the important thing.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,396
Registered: ‎04-19-2016

Very nice to have had everything taken care of at the time you lost your mother.  

My daughter and family live next door to me and it is comforting to me because I lost my husband in April and just nice to have them so close.   I recently updated my will and have all the other necessary papers completed and she knows where everything is.

 

It is important for peace of mind for everyone to have things in order.  When my husband passed he had everything in order and I knew what his wishes were as well.  I always was aware of our expenses and involved in all those things.  Actually, I was much better at it than he was but a I was also surprised how well he made sure I was taken of.    So it is something we hate to think about but also much better for those we leave behind to have our affairs in order.

 

I am sorry for the loss of your mother but also you can feel proud of the job you and your family did to help make her life easier as well.  

So important for people to talk about those things in advance.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,277
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@Roscoe the Rascal It must be very comforting to have your daughter & her family living next door! I am very sorry for your loss.

 

My own daughter will never live that close but I am hoping that she and the family move within 20 minutes or so from us.  They want to move nearby but it is hard now with the very high prices of homes and interest rates.....hopefully soon!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,396
Registered: ‎04-19-2016

@haddon9 wrote:

@Roscoe the Rascal It must be very comforting to have your daughter & her family living next door! I am very sorry for your loss.

 

My own daughter will never live that close but I am hoping that she and the family move within 20 minutes or so from us.  They want to move nearby but it is hard now with the very high prices of homes and interest rates.....hopefully soon!


They use to live down the street but when this house came up for sale they snatched it.  Dad helped with that decision.  Much nicer house too.  I have been lucky.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,960
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Forgot to add : we used one credit card dedicated to Mom's stuff. Easier to keep track of.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,217
Registered: ‎09-01-2010

Peace of mind is a great blessing after the loss of a loved one.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 34,052
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@Group 5 minus 1 wrote:

Years ago it was time for Mom to sell her house and move closer to us. She was about 300 miles away. She told us when she was ready and we ( the family) did most of it. We set up an appt. w/a realtor's. Interviewed a few retirement communities and looked in to her finances. When the time came we moved her and her stuff here. We had already found a retirement home very near us (2 miles away) . We made sure she had all she wanted. Set her up w/a PCP. She already had a will. We did everything for her. Set up meds,paid bills,etc. She didn't like the first appartment, so we moved her . Her one wish was that we were VERY nearby. We never fussed at her,just made sure she had all she wanted. Also made sure there was a bank in her RC. Then she moved again. Liked that much better. As an only child I had a lot of responsibility,but it was easier when she was just a few miles away. It was a lot of work,but easier because she was very nearby. I thank God for Hubbs  and my sons and their families,because we all did it together. When she passed at 98 years ,we took her home to be buried next to Daddy. 

I have peace of mind.


@Group 5 minus 1 I am very happy for you that you have peace of mind and had such a good experience that many people don't get.  You were truly blessed.  And your cooperative mother was blessed to have you.