Among Friends

[qvc chick]

Cakers, wow you have a fanatasic memory.  No my daugher moved away to school.  We are very close.  That was much harder.  My son and I are not that close

AND PLEASE, DO NOT MISCONSTRUE MY THOUGHTS.  I NEVER SAID THAT I DID NOT THINK HE SHOULD MOVE OUT!

I ONLY SAID THAT THE HOUSE WILL BE QUIET, AND I AM NOT USED TO THAT.

[beckyb1012]

I have been living alone since March 2004 and have loved every moment of it.  My place, my time, my rules.  My son and his family come over often and I go to them often as well.  But with a 45 min. drive time it is rarely a spur of the moment surprise visit for any of us.  Which we all prefer.  I give them space and "Grandma" here still gets tons of hugs and kisses.  I still work so that of course is a plus side to being out and about and active with other people.

Find your favorite things to do and still cook the things you love but only on a smaller scale.   Freezing is wonderful.  I found a new hobby recreating family size recipes into smaller healthier versions for one.

[Shanus]

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@qvc chick wrote:

I am currently in a single family home, my adult son lives with me, but he is moving out next month.  My daugher has her own place a few miles away.

I am not sure how I feel about living alone.  Benn divorced for many years, and now with my son moving, will be all alone, except for my dogs. 

Feeling a little sad, and probably will be lonely.  Have alot of friends, but all of a sudden, the empty rooms/no noise, scare me.

Any tips?

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@qvc chick  I assume it will feel strange and lonely for awhile until you adjust and then you may appreciate it. 

In in my life, I’ve never lived alone, so cannot relate. From living at home, went to college w/ roommates, met my husband at school & lived home for 6 months before our wedding...I’ve never had an apartment or experienced being on my own. I wish I hadn’t missed that part of my adult life.

[Cakers3]

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@qvc chick wrote:

Cakers, wow you have a fanatasic memory.  No my daugher moved away to school.  We are very close.  That was much harder.  My son and I are not that close

AND PLEASE, DO NOT MISCONSTRUE MY THOUGHTS.  I NEVER SAID THAT I DID NOT THINK HE SHOULD MOVE OUT!

I ONLY SAID THAT THE HOUSE WILL BE QUIET, AND I AM NOT USED TO THAT.

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@qvc chick  I have no thoughts at all about your son moving out.  I don't know who is saying that but it's not my post.

I asked about your son living with you because when your daughter moved out you indicated the same thing-that you would be alone.

So my question was did your son move back after your daughter moved out? 

Because if you had an empty nest when she moved out then your son had to have come back at some point.

I'm reading that you've been through this empty nest syndrome twice.

That's all.

[beckyb1012]

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@Shanus wrote:

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@qvc chick wrote:

I am currently in a single family home, my adult son lives with me, but he is moving out next month.  My daugher has her own place a few miles away.

I am not sure how I feel about living alone.  Benn divorced for many years, and now with my son moving, will be all alone, except for my dogs. 

Feeling a little sad, and probably will be lonely.  Have alot of friends, but all of a sudden, the empty rooms/no noise, scare me.

Any tips?

---

@qvc chick  I assume it will feel strange and lonely for awhile until you adjust and then you may appreciate it. 

In in my life, I’ve never lived alone, so cannot relate. From living at home, went to college w/ roommates, met my husband at school & lived home for 6 months before our wedding...I’ve never had an apartment or experienced being on my own. I wish I hadn’t missed that part of my adult life.

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Oh @Shanus I remember back in 1980 when my Mom came over to look at my first apt. with my two roommates and she told me she had always regretted not having this time in her life.  So happy she married young and having me but always wondered what the other side was like.  I guess what I remember most about the tour was her telling me how proud she was that I had my own place while working and going to school with no financial help but my own.   Wouldn't you know the one cabinet she opened was the one with the Jack Daniels bottle on the top shelf.  She just laughed and said it would make a great story in the future.

[SeaMaiden]

@qvc chick I do not know your age, but, perhaps it is time to move.... if I were in your situation at my age of 62, and living alone in this house we now live in, I would  sell  this house we own and move to a over 55 community near me called Trillogy.  I would Buy a smaller ranch style home....the community keeps up the yard...plenty of neighbors...activities to do  and easy access to stores. And this is a good move for growing older......

Sometimes it is just time for a change.... your life has changed and so why not try something new? 

[DiAnne]

Maybe there is something wrong with me but I LOVE living alone and I am never lonely.  I had never lived alone in my life.  I lived at home until I got married, before my daughter moved out I had to move my Mother in.  I have been alone now for about 5 years.  I am an avid reader, I do volunteer work, I go to yoga class, to movies/plays, out to lunch/dinner etc.  I am never lonely.  I am lucky to live in a safe neighborhood.  I did have a large dog until a few months ago and while I miss him I now have much more freedom.  

[LTT1]

@qvc chick

My prediction is that you will adjust and not be afraid any longer (I have a funny story about=bout this for another time

As far as adjusting to child/children being gone — well, I have never fully adjusted to THAT but since I HAD to, I just contrasted my feelings with a “what if?”

ie: what if our daughter could not bear to be away from us in order to lead a full life independently? No, I would be terribly unhappy with that and that seemed to be the alternative.

Your time will most likely fill up and if not, you will be able to do whatever you please with your time.

That is a glorious gift!

[Big Sister]

Plan to have lunch or dinner about two times a week with friends.  You will have something to look forward to.

When you feel like it, begin purging of your home and get rid of things you don't want or need anymore.  I did some of that today with very old files.  I have many more to do.  I love having a shredder.

You may want to bring in a housemate.  Whatever you decide to do or not do, begin your new chapter and adventure with a smile on your face.

Good luck!

[Snoopp]

@SeaMaiden  Those Trilogy communities are very nice!