Grandmother's dilemma - Page 3

lovesrecess · ‎03-14-2010

I enjoyed reading your post....I do love seeing my grands....and I do try and say no when it isn't convenient for me. I fondly remember my dear grandmother....and I hope my grandkids will do the same for me.

september · ‎03-09-2010

@lovesrecesswrote:
I enjoyed reading your post....I do love seeing my grands....and I do try and say no when it isn't convenient for me. I fondly remember my dear grandmother....and I hope my grandkids will do the same for me.

They will, because you see them frequently. I’m sure my grand girls forget all about me, in between visits.

GCR18 · ‎07-03-2013

When my sister and her now ex had children, they decided they didn't want to put the children in day care. One thing lead to another and both grandma's ended up babysitting full time with the first baby. They rotated 2 days one week, 3 the next. Babysitting had to be at my sister's house. My mother wouldn't say a word to my sister, she just did it. She was worn out with the long days. First child just turned 19 and has a strong bond with my mother. Unfortunately, the other grandma passed when he was around four.

Kachina624 · ‎03-10-2010

I don't know how I managed to raise my child without any relatives to help. They all lived miles away in other states. Even when my hubs and I were both miserably sick with flu, we managed without help. If we needed a sitter, we hired one.

New Mexico☀️Land Of Enchantment

MarkeieMark · ‎06-24-2012

Why don't you go on a long vacation together, alone.

ID2 · ‎06-25-2012

OP be careful what you wish for! Oh what I wouldn't give to have a grandchild that I could babysit!

"Pure Michigan"

queendiva · ‎03-12-2010

I'm not a grandma yet, but my dilemma as a mother was that my MIL never watched my kids, but never said no to watching her other DIL and DS's kids. Her husband, on the other hand, always said yes- and they were married! MIL only wanted my kids when one of us was there and for all Hallmark holidays around the table- not babysitting.

We only asked occasionally, and either for a short period during the day or well in advance for longer periods. Same for asking my mom, who ALWAYS said yes, even on short notice (emergency) I was always aware mot to take advantage: Saturday nite out- dinner, movie and shopping, for example.

I look forward to watching my future grands, and even have plans to move closer to DSs so I can.

ScrapHappy · ‎03-28-2010

@lovesrecesswrote:
Any grandmothers here who are asked to babysit too often? Am feeling taken advantage of and it takes the joy out of being with my beautiful grand daughters. We are retired, but we want to also have a life of our own. Anyone else in this situation?

I'm not a grandmother but I can tell you that my mother in law told me waaaaay ahead of time "I won't babysit." It was even before we had a child. Didn't matter anyway, we ended up moving 3000 miles away.

Citrine1 · ‎03-09-2010

@jannabelle1wrote:
@Citrine1, can you and your husband help your daughter with the cost of daycare? If so, I would think that's an alternative.

@jannabelle1, I'm sure daycare is a wonderful option for many people, but we've always preferred to watch our kids/grandkids ourselves. As far as finances go, we already pay our daughters mortgage and her sons school tuition. We are doing what we can to help. But I thank you for your suggestion!

Citrine1 · ‎03-09-2010

@kelsey17wrote:
@Citrine1wrote:
I know how you feel @lovesrecess. I am in a very similar situation as you. Saying no, for me, is not an option. My daughter doesn't ask me to babysit so she can go party -- she asks so she can work. She is a single mom doing the best she can. How can I say no to that? But, at 61, I would like to feel as if my life is my own and that my husband and I could do some of the things we dreamed we'd do during our retirement years. It's a dilema that I'm seeing more and more grandparents in.
I am sorry you feel you don't get much time to yourself
and with your husband......but i must say i admire you for
making the sacrafice.............i am sure your daughter appreciates it deeply....

@kelsey17, Thank you so much for your kind words. I expected a lot of criticism for my post and I can't tell you how touched I am by what you said. I'm not sure anyone has ever said they admire me, and I truly appreciate that you have! Yes, my daughter does appreciate what we do for her. And my grandson is the light of my life!