When my first granddaughter was born, my son and his wife lived with us. They just got out of the military and were saving to buy a house and look for jobs.
i worked a full time job and when I cam home from work, I somehow was responsible for her. I had to put her in a carrier while I made dinner.
She was with me so much that everyone assumed that I was her mother. We went on vacation for four weeks one summer and she was with us for three of those weeks.
When they finally got a house, my granddaughter was around three. She cried for weeks in her new home. She missed me. By then, both parents were working and so was I. I could not babysit while I was at work, so they paid for daycare.
My second granddaughter was born two years after the first to my daughter. I was still working, but at watched her when I got home from work. Both parents work until 9:30pm.
My third grandchild is a boy. He is spoiled and doesn’t listen. He is quite the handful. He sometimes hits and is mean to others, especially his older sister. When he is with me, I make him behave. I set boundaries and he either behaves or he doesn’t get privileges. My DIL does not like my style. She gives in to him when he acts up. My son tries to make him behave, but gives in to keep the peace.
i watch him when asked, but since his mother does not like the way he is treated by me “mean grandmother” she only asks when she doesn’t have another sitter lined up.
These kids are now 15, 13 and 9. I still watch the 13 year old after school most nights. I also pick her up from school. She is a delight and no trouble...straight A student.
i only get the 15 and 9 year old kids when their parents are going out late or somewhere for all day. The boy does not behave at home and the 15 year old is not allowed to discipline him, so they can’t be trusted together alone for too long.
i also take all three together with me for long weekends and a couple of weeks during the summer months. They all listen to me...even the boy. He has learned that Grandma means business and he behaves for me now. He requires a firm hand and sometimes my loud voice.
When they were little, I have to admit that I felt like I was taken advantage of...especially for the first granddaughter. But as time went on, babysitting became easier and no problem. I just had to be with them, prepare food, etc. but, they would entertain themselves. Plus, i didn’t get them as often since they were in school and had activities.
Everytime I am asked to watch them, I’ll say yes, unless I have something else to do. I have to say no when I can’t.
My family was good to me and watched my kids, so we pass the kindness on in my family.
None of my grandkids have another set of grandparents to help out. Two of them have a Grammy, but she lives in another state...and the 13 year old has one who lives close, but She is all about herself...long story. My granddaughter doesn’t like to visit with her.
IMO, you should watch your granddaughters when you can. If there is a reason why you can’t...for whatever reason, just politely say ”no sorry, I have other plans.” Or make arrangements to only have them say...for two days a week, whatever works for you.
You certainly deserve space and free time for yourself. But watch them when it is convenient for you.
i never had grandparents, but all of my friends did. I was so jealous of the close relationship they had. Everyone thought my parents were my grandparents.
I went to a funeral last week. My DH’s first cousin died. He had 5 grandchildren...all older teenagers now. My heart went out when I saw how they wept. They were so heartbroken to lose their Pappy.
Again, I was a bit jealous of their close relationship and wished I would have had grandparents.
i want the same for my grandkids. Grandparents are very important members for children.
Sorry for the long post.
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