Re: DD renting apt for 5yrs. We can help

hyacinth003 · ‎03-12-2010

@hckynut wrote:

@sissel

I have no human kids, in case you are not familiar with me. I do however have experience of renting and buying 2 townhomes/single family home, and a sister who was a real estate broker for 45 years.

I do not believe in giving any healthy adult any money, key word "giving". Loaning, with a legally binding contract? Depends on their financial and work record ability to pay.

Interest rates are about as low as I have ever seen them for Mortgage loans, and that is certainly a plus. Wondering if her mortgage payments will be lower than her rent payments. If so, she can pay that difference in $$$ to her parents(you), no?

I understand the 20% issue. My sis had a lot of potential buyers on both sides of the financial problem. Some had the 20% saved, but when interest rate were, at one time, 19%, they could not qualify for the monthly mortgage payments. Some could qualify, but, they did not have ths 20% to put down.

I know more than I wanted about this because in 1979, I was selling my first townhome as our 2nd one was being built. I got locked in on my new loan for 90 days at 9%. In the building phase of our new townhome, interest rates went up to 19%. I ended up paying for 2 mortgages for over 14 months, and ended up losing a ton of money selling my first townhome, all because of the Federal Reserve deciding to ruin millions of contractors lives, and many more millions of potential home owners, and sellers like myself, that got caught in this disaster.

Hey, it's your money, but me, I think a lot of the problems of today were started by the "you owe me", and parents that do not believe the way my mother raised me to be, when in came to working for everything I need/want to own. No credit cards, just hard work and save your own money and be independent of anyone.

hckynut(john)

Many, if not most, parents, really want to help their children out. Not to spoil them, or give them an idea that the world owes them, but out of love.

There is a time for kicking in the butt to get them going! My parents helped my husband and I out for a 20% down payment. We didn't see ourselves being able to save that much for a long time. We were responsible people and remained responsible.

So, under the right circumstance, I would help if I could. I had sort of an argument with a friend who was going to give his son $7,500 for an engagement ring. I said I thought she didn't need THAT much ring if his son couldn't afford it. I said I thought his son should just buy what he could afford. Perhaps later on he could buy her more ring after he had the money. But, my friend gave it to him, and I still disagree with it! Be different if it was for a necessity, but just for a bigger ring - nope.

I do think sometimes your child SHOULD have to work or wait for something.

Hyacinth

NickNack · ‎03-10-2010

I think it's so odd that @sissel has not been back to comment on this thread. With 6 pages you would think the OP would be back to at least thank people for their comments.

The Bluebird Carries The Sky On His Back"
-Henry David Thoreau

Susan in California · ‎06-02-2014

I'm sure you understand a lot of the comments come from situations very different from your own.

You know your own child, whether she is a productive

person.

Personally, I would rather help out my productive, adult

children now if I could. Ultimately, they will receive

down the road anyway...

missy1 · ‎03-10-2010

If her DD can qualify by herself---- DD name on the title only (20% is a gift)

If her DD can't qualify by herself----both names on the title or just the op

or

OP holds unto the (20%) until the DD can qualify.

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

@sissel wrote:
DD renting apt for 5yrs so DH& I can give her 2o% down for a townhouse . We are retired & she is an only child think this will be a good move. Tired of this renting ******, but we will be on the title with her. She doesn't have enough down payment. She is 28yrs. Just tired of renting & if we can help out Is this wrong? She will inherit the money when we die so maybe do this now.

@sissel

I read your post twice and still don't understand someting .... is it your daughter that is tired of "the renting thing" .... or you? What is actually driving this, anyway?

She's 28, assuming she's single and this is the least amount of responsibility she'll have for the rest of her life. Is her job rock solid, or might she change jobs in the future? Why are you insisting on having your names on the title? Is there a serious young man in the picture?

I get the impression there's more going on here .... is she capable of the responsibilities of home ownership?

itiswhatitis · ‎05-27-2016

@depglass wrote:
When we did our will our lawyer brought up a couple points we had never thought of. Same situation, one daughter only. What if she declares bankruptcy? You will lose your investment. What if she marries (male or female) her partner now will own part of the condo. What if she just ups and moves across the country for job or whatever. You will be left holding the bag. Think this through thoroughly and do talk to your lawyer.

@depglass, some of this doesn't sound right. Anything tangible (home/assets) that are acquired BEFORE marriage is off limits to the newcomer. In other words, the man or woman is marrying the person with the assets has no right to them unless he/she stipulates such.

*Call Tyrone*

itiswhatitis · ‎05-27-2016

I think it's wonderful that you want to help your daughter. In essence you will be helping her on sound footing with a home of her own. As others have mentioned, it can be gifted.

Another thing to consider is that she doesn't have to put 20% down although banks now are looking for this an at least up to a year's worth of savings. HFA still exists and she could get a home for as little as 5% down Note: I'm not recommending it, I'm just telling you the program for First Time Home Buyers is there. Something to consider. She will pay the penalty in the way of Mortgage Insurance for this but when calculated it is not much spread out over the life of the loan. Of course, it can be paid off as well.

If she will be buying in a community of homes she should look into any association fees. These fees typically include the upkeep of the grounds, trash and so on. These same fees apply to most Co ops and Condo's as well.

I'm sure your daughter is proud to have a mom like you!

*Call Tyrone*

itiswhatitis · ‎05-27-2016

@LexPex wrote:
If that's what she wants then do it. I believe in helping while you are still alive, if you can without causing finanical harm to yourself. I would have a lawyer look at how it should be written up. If you give her the down payment, that should do it but if she doesn't have enough income to qualify then yoiu may be faced with co-owing which I am wary of. Lawyer Up.

@LexPex, that's not what it means. It simply means she doesn't have 20% to put down. She could buy a home with less than that down so long as her credit is good and she can foot the bill every month. What she earns yearly, has nothing to do with her liquidity.

*Call Tyrone*

granddi · ‎03-16-2010

@hyacinth003 wrote:
@hckynut wrote:

@sissel

I have no human kids, in case you are not familiar with me. I do however have experience of renting and buying 2 townhomes/single family home, and a sister who was a real estate broker for 45 years.

I do not believe in giving any healthy adult any money, key word "giving". Loaning, with a legally binding contract? Depends on their financial and work record ability to pay.

Interest rates are about as low as I have ever seen them for Mortgage loans, and that is certainly a plus. Wondering if her mortgage payments will be lower than her rent payments. If so, she can pay that difference in $$$ to her parents(you), no?

I understand the 20% issue. My sis had a lot of potential buyers on both sides of the financial problem. Some had the 20% saved, but when interest rate were, at one time, 19%, they could not qualify for the monthly mortgage payments. Some could qualify, but, they did not have ths 20% to put down.

I know more than I wanted about this because in 1979, I was selling my first townhome as our 2nd one was being built. I got locked in on my new loan for 90 days at 9%. In the building phase of our new townhome, interest rates went up to 19%. I ended up paying for 2 mortgages for over 14 months, and ended up losing a ton of money selling my first townhome, all because of the Federal Reserve deciding to ruin millions of contractors lives, and many more millions of potential home owners, and sellers like myself, that got caught in this disaster.

Hey, it's your money, but me, I think a lot of the problems of today were started by the "you owe me", and parents that do not believe the way my mother raised me to be, when in came to working for everything I need/want to own. No credit cards, just hard work and save your own money and be independent of anyone.

hckynut(john)

Many, if not most, parents, really want to help their children out. Not to spoil them, or give them an idea that the world owes them, but out of love.

There is a time for kicking in the butt to get them going! My parents helped my husband and I out for a 20% down payment. We didn't see ourselves being able to save that much for a long time. We were responsible people and remained responsible.

So, under the right circumstance, I would help if I could. I had sort of an argument with a friend who was going to give his son $7,500 for an engagement ring. I said I thought she didn't need THAT much ring if his son couldn't afford it. I said I thought his son should just buy what he could afford. Perhaps later on he could buy her more ring after he had the money. But, my friend gave it to him, and I still disagree with it! Be different if it was for a necessity, but just for a bigger ring - nope.

I do think sometimes your child SHOULD have to work or wait for something.

Hyacinth

I agree with you. I wanted to reply to John but he is such a respected contributor that I felt like many would take my remarks as critical of John personally.

I am retired. During my very demanding career, my children were very supportive. They are successful adults. My ability to supplement in issues such as home purchase, g children education or others, is not indulgence but our choice.

They have never asked for financial help. It is my pleasure to see them enjoy the rewards of hard work. As I said when the children were young, they were never a problem. They were good kids, good students and now good adults. It's a family matter.

CelticCrafter · ‎03-09-2010

@itiswhatitis wrote:
@depglass wrote:
When we did our will our lawyer brought up a couple points we had never thought of. Same situation, one daughter only. What if she declares bankruptcy? You will lose your investment. What if she marries (male or female) her partner now will own part of the condo. What if she just ups and moves across the country for job or whatever. You will be left holding the bag. Think this through thoroughly and do talk to your lawyer.
@depglass, some of this doesn't sound right. Anything tangible (home/assets) that are acquired BEFORE marriage is off limits to the newcomer. In other words, the man or woman is marrying the person with the assets has no right to them unless he/she stipulates such.

They need to be kept separate.

Don't put money into a joint account, don't switch other assets over to joint ownership