Among Friends

[RespectLife]

Two men meet on opposite sides of a river.

One shouts to the other "I need you to help me get to the other side."

The other guy shouts "You ARE on the other side!"

[lgfan]

A man swam half way across a river and then realized that he was tired and could not reach the other side so he turned around and went back.

[Cakers3]

A polar bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender “I’ll have a rum …………………. and coke.”

The bartender asks, “What’s with the big pause?”

The bear shrugs. “I was born with them".

Did you hear about the guy who ate six cans of alphabet soup? He had the biggest vowel movement ever.

I was addicted to the hokey pokey.

But then I turned myself around.

Did you hear about the fork factory with inconsistent quality control? It was the best of tines, it was the worst of tines.

New CBD infused toilet paper! Now everyone can calm their butt down!

[Malcontent]

What does an Italian have when one arm is shorter than the other?

A speech impediment.

“I don’t have to make sense. I’m Italian!”

Gina Lollobrigida in Come September.

[just bee]

---

@Malcontent wrote:

What does an Italian have when one arm is shorter than the other?

A speech impediment.

“I don’t have to make sense. I’m Italian!”

Gina Lollobrigida in Come September.

---

@Malcontent 

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[just bee]

What do you call a canine magician?

A labracadabrador.

[Malcontent]

@just bee 

What do you call an Italian with no hands?

Mute.

“I don’t have to make sense. I’m Italian!”

Gina Lollobrigida in Come September.

[just bee]

---

@Malcontent wrote:

@just bee 

What do you call an Italian with no hands?

Mute.

“I don’t have to make sense. I’m Italian!”

Gina Lollobrigida in Come September.

---

@Malcontent 

Very similar to the classic:

How to you silence an Italian? You tie their hands behind their back.

Apparently you are another Italian who isn't offended by Italian jokes.  Apparently I'm an Italian who speaks with her hands.  (I confess.)

[Malcontent]

@just bee 

The Italian hand jokes are funny because they are true. It’s in our DNA -- we Italians speak with our hands and sometimes our feet too. lol.

[just bee]

---

@Malcontent wrote:

@just bee 

The Italian hand jokes are funny because they are true. It’s in our DNA -- we Italians speak with our hands and sometimes our feet too. lol.

---

@Malcontent 

Speaking of DNA...