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Contributor
Posts: 34
Registered: ‎11-10-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

Take her a little present. That is what I do and my grandkids love me and are excited to see me. You should know by now what she loves . I also babysit them when the parents need to go out that has been a good way to get to know them.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,407
Registered: ‎07-07-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

@Magga1234  Ask her why she doesn't seem to want to spend time with you. 

The next time that I hear salt and ice together, it better be in a margarita!
Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,549
Registered: ‎05-23-2015

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

I was a shy little girl and I can tell you sometimes having people forced on me was torture. Of course she shouldn’t be rude or disrespectful, but beyond that .i don’t know what you want her parents to do. We like who we like, and you did say you have had good times with her. My advice is don’t try and force it. Just another perspective .

" You are entitled to your opinion. But you are not entitled to your own facts."
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Honored Contributor
Posts: 30,176
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

My youngest grandson is always playing with his toys when I come over.  He is now 7.

 

I started sending him little super hero books, etc in the mail. Kids don’t get mail and it’s a big deal.

 

I also make a point of taking him his beloved French fries and we all have lunch at his house.

 

My daughter has always called all of her children to “ come to say goodbye to grandma”.

 

The child’s family can initiate some time of easy one on one like “ show grandma a picture you made”.  Things like that.

 

When you send some little things in the mail, tell her parents to have her do a picture “ thank you” for the next time you come.

 

My family sends each other thank you notes all of the time.  From the time the child is born ( mom does scribbles) a thank you note is mailed out.  I thought my girls that, now they do it and their children ( some are teenagers) do that.

 

Make it so there’s something special that just you and the child shares.

 

You need to work for the affection for a child that young.  But when you get it, it’s genuine and one of the purest kind of love. There is.

 

Just try some of what I suggested.  Please come back in about 1 month and let us know how it’s going.

 

Dont give up.  You are already a great grandma just by showing you care enough to try.

 

If I knew you, I’d give you one on my chubby hugs.  Take care.Smiley Happy

Honored Contributor
Posts: 63,762
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

She's an only child and perhaps as such it takes her longer to warm up to people... She's probably a bit of a loner... Reprimanding her is not the answer... She'll perhaps become more social as she gets older and becomes more familiar with you... Making her feel badly because of what is probably a natural wariness is only going to push her further away... I'm sure you want a special bond with your granddaughter, but you also have to remember, it isn't all about you, and I say that without rancor, it's just reality...


In my pantry with my cupcakes...
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,450
Registered: ‎10-03-2014

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

How does she react to other people?  If she reacts differently, very friendly, maybe you are trying too hard.

 

When I was five, my grandmothers didn't play with me, nor did I want them to. 

 

I have a nephew who at this age always wanted to play games with me.  He'd run up to me as soon as I walked in the door. His brother a year younger did not.  He wanted to do his own thing.  Different personalities.  One was very social.  The other, a loner.  I'd say hello to the loner and he'd ignore me.  I'd say it a few times louder.  Eventually, said Hi, but that was it.  I didn't take it personally.  As adults, they are the same, one very social, the other a loner. 

 

Without more information, it's difficult to say if there is a problem in your situation.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,951
Registered: ‎03-27-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

@Annabellethecat66   What a great granny!  You remind me, when I was a child after opening Christmas presents we sat around the table and wrote Thank You notes....no choice it was expected. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,717
Registered: ‎10-30-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

Although, her behavior is hurtful at the end of the day she is only five years old. She is the child you are the adult.

 

Give her time. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,487
Registered: ‎03-21-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

The next time you see her I would completely ignore her ... don’t even make eye contact ..... mark my words she will be completely confused as to why you are doing this & she will seek you out for attention ... good luck!!😃

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,326
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: My granddaughter ..please help...

[ Edited ]

Take her out to lunch or for an ice cream or a toy store. Just the two of you.  She’ll have no choice but to pay attention to you.  I think that attention will translate to other situations.