Re: SHOPAHOLICS: ONE DAY AT A TIME (FRIDAY, JULY 8... - Page 2

Bird mama · ‎03-12-2010

I know that you don't want to place DH outside of your home until you are really ready to do so.

Sweetie, just play it by ear. Also loop his kid or kids (I can't remember if there is more than one) and see what they say about it.

There are many elements: wind, fire, water
But none quite like the element of surprise

LindaLatte · ‎03-13-2010

I tend to look for "messages"/signs when I need to make decisions, and I think I just received one. The acting director of the "club" took me aside to say DH is no longer eating his "finger foods" unless someone hands them to him/puts them in his mouth.

The "club" can not and does not provide "feeding services", and she was not sure he could continue to come there. The regular director is away until next Thursday. I suggested they just put the lunch in front of him, and if he eats fine, and if not, I could feed him when he gets home. That seems to be okay for the short term. Unlike many people with Alzheimer's, DH has gained rather than lost weight, so I'm not worried that the lack of lunch at lunchtime will be an issue. I can and do feed him even when he has "finger foods" -- just put them in his mouth or hand if he will take them.

The facility director and I will meet next Friday, and he said that if I decide to make his stay there permanent after the two weeks, it would not be a problem. Just sign some more papers, and pay some fees, etc. He might even be able to stay in the same suite. I found out that I can bring him ice cream, etc. that they will keep in the freezer, and that they are used to giving some residents ice cream virtually every day. And, I am welcome to visit all the time.

To top things off, DH had an accident at the club, and he did a lot of sleeping. Things seem to be going downhill so quickly.

He has two children, Bernie. Although I want them to be happy with the decision, I believe it is my decision. Hope that doesn't;t sound mean, but....

Berlybaby · ‎08-20-2013

always reading but not contributing. Linda I think you need to make the big move. You've been so loving and caring but now seems to be the time for the big move. Good luck and lots of prayers.

Bird mama · ‎03-12-2010

@LindaLatte

I've always felt that it was your decision as you are with your beloved on a daily basis. I was trying to be nice (he he) and thought if they backed your play it would make it easier.

I too believe in signs and whispers (from a higher power) that help me when I am at a crossroads.

I wish I could give you a hug. I'm not saying the following to be nice.

Linda, you are an inspiration to me. Your love and dedication to your beloved humbles me.

There are many elements: wind, fire, water
But none quite like the element of surprise

Snicks1 · ‎07-28-2012

Just popping in to say that it is definitely your decision Linda, you are the caregiver. I know you would not put your DH in a facility if it was not a necessity. You are and have been a very loving, caring person. I agree that I think the "club" today gave you the sign you needed to make that final decision. Bless your heart, you have done so much more and for so much longer than most do. So please take heart and know you will be doing the best thing for both of you. Your life counts too. You deserve to live it as well as care for DH.

"To each their own, in all things".

ksmitty28 · ‎06-03-2010

LindaL, you are certainly in my prayers. When my FIL was torn, the signs started to appear. Nonetheless, as he will tell anyone, the hardest decision of his life, but once she was settled, he was peaceful as he could not continue at home, even with some help. (((Hugs)))

Charlene, my mom is gone owner a year, but shortly after, my Dad has a severe stroke and then went downhill quickly, and passes away last August. It was a rough 7 months. So, we did the basics, but now we're into the basement and attic. We have found some jewelry and money "hidden", so we are going through very carefully.

We just had some severe storms...my plants and the grass are very happy, I'm sure. I agree, Bernie, something about rainwater that makes a difference.

Jean, how's the printer? Do you have the original kindle, or a newer one? Mine is ok, just thinking about an upgrade.

Hi to all I've missed...gotta run to pick DS up at JFK. He's flying in from Pittsburg. Have a nice night!!