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01-12-2020 10:18 AM
granted,not granite
01-12-2020 10:31 AM
I have brown hair and extremely blue eyes. My parents and three siblings do not have blue or light colored eyes. Growing up people would say how pretty my eyes were but never had people stare ar make crazy comments.
01-12-2020 10:31 AM - edited 01-12-2020 10:56 AM
@Shanus wrote:When my family moved south from NY in the early 50's, there were 2 Jewish kids in my school. We were dark haired in a sea of blondes w/ blue eyes. Most had never seen a Jewish person. I didn't feel different. I felt special. It's all in your perception which is taught by your parents. Self acceptance stays with you for a lifetime no matter if weight changes, height differs or physical impairments/limitations occur. No announcements or excuses need to be made. We are who we are. The outside of people have become way more important than their hearts.
@Shanus I agree with so much of what you posted. Self acceptance and character is and should always be the most important thing that is the foundation of how we see ourselves.
But where we differ is that from across the street, I would not have been able to tell whether that pretty little girl was Jewish.. But let any pretty little brown or black girl walk down the street in some towns and some years, and it's as if she has a target on her back. She can be a strong and emotionally healthy all she wants, but she will encounter others who put her in a box labeled inferior, and much, much worse -- every day. That's my story and reality. In no way does that mean I ever stopped believing how strong and fabulous I was. It just meant my mettle was stronger than others' ridiculous bias that worked overtime to break me.
It sounds like Courtney was just trying to talk about a small facet of her upbringing, and how she dealt with some of it.
Courtney's show is called Dare to Share Style, and I would assume QVC asked her to come up with a soul-searching story to share and tie it back to the way fashion helped change her self image. If she said fashion was just a very small part, then fine. Unfortunately, it sounds like (I did not watch it) it came across as trivializing the much deeper issues in society about self-perceptions growing up. Risky.
01-12-2020 10:46 AM
Persian is a euphenism (sp) for Iranian.
01-12-2020 10:54 AM
I didn't see it but kudos to her. If she was sincere that's all that counts. It's a fact, like saying one was turned on to fashion with their first Seventeen magazine.
01-12-2020 11:05 AM
@MW in Iowa, what a tender heart you have. I bet your friends and family feel lucky to have you around.
I have two close friends who also lived in neighborhoods where they felt isolated. They both said college helped to change their outlook and make them stronger.
Sometimes self-esteem and self-confidence are helped along by outside forces.
01-12-2020 11:10 AM
@Caaareful Shopper wrote:
@Shanus wrote:When my family moved south from NY in the early 50's, there were 2 Jewish kids in my school. We were dark haired in a sea of blondes w/ blue eyes. Most had never seen a Jewish person. I didn't feel different. I felt special. It's all in your perception which is taught by your parents. Self acceptance stays with you for a lifetime no matter if weight changes, height differs or physical impairments/limitations occur. No announcements or excuses need to be made. We are who we are. The outside of people have become way more important than their hearts.
@Shanus I agree with so much of what you posted. Self acceptance and character is and should always be the most important thing that is the foundation of how we see ourselves.
But where we differ is that from across the street, I would not have been able to tell whether that pretty little girl was Jewish.. But let any pretty little brown or black girl walk down the street in some towns and some years, and it's as if she has a target on her back. She can be a strong and emotionally healthy all she wants, but she will encounter others who put her in a box labeled inferior, and much, much worse -- every day. That's my story and reality. In no way does that mean I ever stopped believing how strong and fabulous I was. It just meant my mettle was stronger than others' ridiculous bias that worked overtime to break me.
It sounds like Courtney was just trying to talk about a small facet of her upbringing, and how she dealt with some of it.
Courtney's show is called Dare to Share Style, and I would assume QVC asked her to come up with a soul-searching story to share and tie it back to the way fashion helped change her self image. If she said fashion was just a very small part, then fine. Unfortunately, it sounds like (I did not watch it) it came across as trivializing the much deeper issues in society about self-perceptions growing up. Risky.
@Caaareful Shopper I appreciate your candor and understand your point. Thanks for sharing.
01-12-2020 11:22 AM
@Carmie wrote:@Shanus I am very different looking. Very few people look like me.
I had black hair and extremely light cool bright blue eyes. My hair is salt and pepper now.
All of my life people have stared at me and invited others to " look at her eyes". They even did this to me when I was a toddler. My blue eyes glow, especially against my very pale skin color with dark hair.
My husband gets upset at people when they do this and get very close to me to look,
but I am used to it. When we traveled to Asia ( more than once) I was bombarded with onlookers.
It's no big deal to look different when everything normal except for your unusual hair, eye or skin coloring.
@Carmie I sympathize. My DD and I are (and have been) usually the tiniest women in the group...both in height and size. While growing up, we both had almost black hair against very fair skin, she with bluish green eyes & mine were green. Many things that made us "stand out". When comments or compliments came our way, "thank you" would seem sufficient or no explanations needed.
If someone got that close to me to take a look at the exact color of my eyes, they're in my personal space. That would bother me more than looking unusual.
01-12-2020 11:23 AM
01-12-2020 11:28 AM
Maybe we all need to see the Mr. Rogers movie and take in his message again. "You're wonderful and I love you just the way you are".
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