Re: update on my highly sensitive co-worker

YorkieonmyPillow · ‎01-13-2013

On 3/23/2015 Justina rae said:
On 3/23/2015 beanie said:
On 3/22/2015 Pashmina said:
On 3/21/2015 Plaid Pants said:
On 3/21/2015 occasional rain said:
On 3/21/2015 Pashmina said:
Why start this thread if you are not going to tell us what provoked this thread in the first place. And yes I read the other thread but that still doesn't explain why you are shaking or calling your union rep.

I have to agree with you. All we've been told is that a co-worker who had an office to herself now has to accommodate the OP, upsetting to anyone sensitive or not. The OP was given a book to explain the co-workers highly sensitive nature. Nothing more. No examples of what the co-worker has done to upset the OP.

Why did she even post the thread if she wasn't going to explain the situation?

Now we are given an update that the OP is so upset, not a clue about what, that she is going to her union with her complaint which is still a mystery.

For all we know, the o/p is the "sensitive" one.

That is what I am beginning to think too.

Not true...

I should have titled this thread: Only read this post if you read the PRECIOUS post by me regarding a Highly Sensitive Co-Worker. She, herself, has titled herself this way. She doesn't like to be looked at and she doesn't want to share the office. She doesn't want me to answer questions people might previously have asked her...she doesn't want me to touch the mail. She feels threatened and insecure. I've explained that I am probably the least person to be threatened by in the whole bldg. I am 61 years old. I do my job and I have no interest in doing someone else's or trying to prove my worth. I think a lot of thought went into placing "someone" in the office with her and they thought I would be the easiest one for her to get along with.

If that's all this is about why are you "shaking"? What has she done to you?? I would just do my job, ignore her, smile at her and maybe compliment her now and then.

People like this are very difficult to deal with. They send out negative vibes. Haven't you ever encountered a person like this?

straykatz · ‎03-09-2010

On 3/23/2015 YorkieonmyPillow said:
On 3/23/2015 Justina rae said:
On 3/23/2015 beanie said:
On 3/22/2015 Pashmina said:
On 3/21/2015 Plaid Pants said:
On 3/21/2015 occasional rain said:
On 3/21/2015 Pashmina said:
Why start this thread if you are not going to tell us what provoked this thread in the first place. And yes I read the other thread but that still doesn't explain why you are shaking or calling your union rep.

I have to agree with you. All we've been told is that a co-worker who had an office to herself now has to accommodate the OP, upsetting to anyone sensitive or not. The OP was given a book to explain the co-workers highly sensitive nature. Nothing more. No examples of what the co-worker has done to upset the OP.

Why did she even post the thread if she wasn't going to explain the situation?

Now we are given an update that the OP is so upset, not a clue about what, that she is going to her union with her complaint which is still a mystery.

For all we know, the o/p is the "sensitive" one.

That is what I am beginning to think too.

Not true...

I should have titled this thread: Only read this post if you read the PRECIOUS post by me regarding a Highly Sensitive Co-Worker. She, herself, has titled herself this way. She doesn't like to be looked at and she doesn't want to share the office. She doesn't want me to answer questions people might previously have asked her...she doesn't want me to touch the mail. She feels threatened and insecure. I've explained that I am probably the least person to be threatened by in the whole bldg. I am 61 years old. I do my job and I have no interest in doing someone else's or trying to prove my worth. I think a lot of thought went into placing "someone" in the office with her and they thought I would be the easiest one for her to get along with.

If that's all this is about why are you "shaking"? What has she done to you?? I would just do my job, ignore her, smile at her and maybe compliment her now and then.

People like this are very difficult to deal with. They send out negative vibes. Haven't you ever encountered a person like this?

I have...and I agree with the previous post....wear a smile...kill 'em with kindness. You can't change her but you can change how you react to her.

Justina rae · ‎01-02-2015

Yorkie - I said in a previous post on this thread that I've dealt with a lot of doozies in my work life. When I was younger and didn't know any better I allowed them to bother me. After a while you learn not to take on other people's issues, to hold your head high and just do your job. That's my experience. As I also posted previously...unless this co-worker is sabotaging the OP's work or verbally or physically threatening her in some way then it's the OP who is making too much of this.

ETA: Exactly straykatz.

Burnsite · ‎03-10-2010

I ignore coworkers who are difficult and just do my job the best I can. Works pretty well for me. I do not attempt to police other people.

It's a little like the conversations on here: you can brood over injustices, which certainly fly about here. Or you can just say what you think and then leave the thread, so the fight-pickers (those who post twenty posts for everyone else's one post) don't steal any of your time or patience.

The great thing in life is to get on with what you want or need to get on with, and not lose focus because of irrelevant noise. Irrelevant noise is what this co-worker sounds like to me.

A person who has another person placed into her once private office, who is not welcoming? She is a bad employee and is not doing her job. The office she was assigned is not her home, and she should make the transition easier for the new person.

And I say this despite scoring a really high score on that Sensitive Person quiz. I know how to deal with my need for space, but I do not have a need for personal space at my place of work. What I need to work well there is to be given an opportunity to concentrate.

If the coworker is messing with the OP's ability to do her job.,then the problem has to be addressed by one of that coworker's supervisors. The company is poorly supervised if she is thrown into the lion's den and then expected to deal with it.

I've been in a million offices in my day, having worked a day or a month everywhere during the years I was a grad student and worked as a temp in New York.

I read somewhere something about office work I totally agreed with: the workplace situation is like a marriage. Some are happy, most are somewhat conflicted and stressful. And then there are the workplaces (temps see a lot of these) that are wholly on the rocks.

It's never ONE person in a workplace. It's about how well the team works together and how speedily conflicts are dealt with. I hope the OP has a good office that addresses these problems, or they are wasting their money hiring people who are not given the support needed to do a good job.

Lucibee · ‎03-19-2010

Great post Burnsite! Very helpful.

LucyGoose · ‎04-20-2012

I've had to work with someone I did not get along with. It was NOT fun.

beanie · ‎03-10-2010

On 3/23/2015 straykatz said:
On 3/23/2015 YorkieonmyPillow said:
On 3/23/2015 Justina rae said:
On 3/23/2015 beanie said:
On 3/22/2015 Pashmina said:
On 3/21/2015 Plaid Pants said:
On 3/21/2015 occasional rain said:
On 3/21/2015 Pashmina said:
Why start this thread if you are not going to tell us what provoked this thread in the first place. And yes I read the other thread but that still doesn't explain why you are shaking or calling your union rep.

I have to agree with you. All we've been told is that a co-worker who had an office to herself now has to accommodate the OP, upsetting to anyone sensitive or not. The OP was given a book to explain the co-workers highly sensitive nature. Nothing more. No examples of what the co-worker has done to upset the OP.

Why did she even post the thread if she wasn't going to explain the situation?

Now we are given an update that the OP is so upset, not a clue about what, that she is going to her union with her complaint which is still a mystery.

For all we know, the o/p is the "sensitive" one.

That is what I am beginning to think too.

Not true...

I should have titled this thread: Only read this post if you read the PRECIOUS post by me regarding a Highly Sensitive Co-Worker. She, herself, has titled herself this way. She doesn't like to be looked at and she doesn't want to share the office. She doesn't want me to answer questions people might previously have asked her...she doesn't want me to touch the mail. She feels threatened and insecure. I've explained that I am probably the least person to be threatened by in the whole bldg. I am 61 years old. I do my job and I have no interest in doing someone else's or trying to prove my worth. I think a lot of thought went into placing "someone" in the office with her and they thought I would be the easiest one for her to get along with.

If that's all this is about why are you "shaking"? What has she done to you?? I would just do my job, ignore her, smile at her and maybe compliment her now and then.

People like this are very difficult to deal with. They send out negative vibes. Haven't you ever encountered a person like this?

I have...and I agree with the previous post....wear a smile...kill 'em with kindness. You can't change her but you can change how you react to her.

ok...thanks for the advise. That is what I will do. Just do my job, smile and get it done. Thanks for letting me vent.

YorkieonmyPillow · ‎01-13-2013

On 3/23/2015 Justina rae said:
Yorkie - I said in a previous post on this thread that I've dealt with a lot of doozies in my work life. When I was younger and didn't know any better I allowed them to bother me. After a while you learn not to take on other people's issues, to hold your head high and just do your job. That's my experience. As I also posted previously...unless this co-worker is sabotaging the OP's work or verbally or physically threatening her in some way then it's the OP who is making too much of this.

ETA: Exactly straykatz.

That's true - you have to mentally build a protective bubble around yourself and keep yourself centered.

Hayfield · ‎03-10-2010

I'm 60 years old and have been in the workforce for over 40 years and it may be my imagination but it seems like it's much more difficult today to work with people than it was 40 years ago or maybe in my younger years I could just deal with it better. I do agree with what Yorkieonmy Pillow said, you have to mentally build a protective bubble around yourself and keep yourself centered.

JuJu Squeezie · ‎08-16-2013

Being shaky about this won't help anything. Understanding that life is always in flux and changing might. It'll work out and you will have more wisdom to store away for the next speed bump.