Community Chat

[1966]

Another might not able to sleep, everyone has made some good points and I appreciate your comments. I didn't word it right more than likely about what you give in a marriage. Some say "will I gave my 50%" and I say no one day you might carry the load and the next day your partner might carry more. I feel my husband has carried more since after being so ill there are things I can't do any longer, lost half foot and half arm, he doesn't complain , and doesn't say I do more than you, you just step in and do it when you love someone. We been married 48 years so I think were doing pretty good.

As my daughter I agree she needs to get some help but she wouldn't think she needs any. My good friend told me who has know our daughter since birth has a deeper problem and might not even realize and takes it out on me . As for our grand daughter I would never want to force her to see us, she loves both her dad and mom so much and I know she loves us but don't want to get hurt in any way having to decide. I want to tell our ex son in law what's going on but want to wait longer, he's doing great and maybe our grand daughter will mention to him what is happening.

I didn't think before but I do think maybe she wanted a bad boy since ex was complete different, straight no wild side in him where how WAY different.

You all to make me feel some what better.

[ECBG]

1966 I left you a reply on your other post. Best of Luck!

[Cakers1]

On 9/2/2014 1966 said:

I got a phone call and new son and law said who he was and stated we were not to call, leave messages, write letters, step foot on his property or drive by their house or he would call police and but a warrant out for us for harasment sorry mind blank sp. wr.

Didn't say that to my husband face. So I been crying. I'm just SICK, what is happening.

This is a huge red flag. He is isolating your daughter and your precious grandchild and that is NOT GOOD.

He can threaten to call the police but without a valid restraining order, that's just his twisted controlling persona flapping away.

I seriously doubt all is well in that house; speak to your former SIL and as an attorney he should be able to advise you and also take control at least for the sake of his precious daughter.

eta: And do tell your husband.

[ROMARY]

DD could be on some type of meds, not being able to think (no common sense). Sometimes meds, drugs, etc. affect people's ability to think. Maybe the lawyer has some advice. You might ask him whether or not he witnessed any meds. (or whatever) that DD was taking while married to him. It's worth a try, anyway.

[LilacTree]

There are laws in every state guaranteeing grandparents' visitation rights. I would contact an attorney immediately.

If her father is an attorney, I can't imagine why he has not already taken steps to provide you with legal visitation rights.

[1966]

well no calls or anything from daughter yet. So today I guess you can say I was down in the dumps and did something everyone told me not to do, I left a message on my daughters cell phone saying how much we love her and I miss her and hope everything is good. I guess I was dreaming that she might call NO CALL. So than I really felt bad I just think she has inner problems, husband stated now that she mention how she hated her first wedding, wasn't nothing like how she wanted it. She did all the deciding and I did the flowers and arrangements and not she's talking about it, it was Oct. 1996. Husband I guess told her why bring that up she's divorce from her first husband the lawyer. My couple real good friends asked if I remember when she started getting more nasty saying maybe after hearing her ex is getting married she realize it was over he found someone else and happy. We told her he would, here's a man very good job, doesn't drink, wonderful provider, great father, they went on all kinds of vacations and she didn't need to work if she didn't want to. While now every penny they need, bad mouth guy, drinks goes out with his buddies, he promised he would fix his old house up after they were married well he hasn't done anything that he promised, She wouldn't let me come visit at the house until she painted and cleaned real good and she herself pulled all the carpet up saying the floor was better than the carpet.

I miss my grand daughter so much along with my husband but we don't want her to get involved and have her mother get upset with her and I'm still hating to call ex. So we just pray our grand daughter will remember all the love and things we have done. and she has never been on any type of meds for her health as far as we know

[LilacTree]

On 9/10/2014 1966 said:

well no calls or anything from daughter yet. So today I guess you can say I was down in the dumps and did something everyone told me not to do, I left a message on my daughters cell phone saying how much we love her and I miss her and hope everything is good. I guess I was dreaming that she might call NO CALL. So than I really felt bad I just think she has inner problems, husband stated now that she mention how she hated her first wedding, wasn't nothing like how she wanted it. She did all the deciding and I did the flowers and arrangements and not she's talking about it, it was Oct. 1996. Husband I guess told her why bring that up she's divorce from her first husband the lawyer. My couple real good friends asked if I remember when she started getting more nasty saying maybe after hearing her ex is getting married she realize it was over he found someone else and happy. We told her he would, here's a man very good job, doesn't drink, wonderful provider, great father, they went on all kinds of vacations and she didn't need to work if she didn't want to. While now every penny they need, bad mouth guy, drinks goes out with his buddies, he promised he would fix his old house up after they were married well he hasn't done anything that he promised, She wouldn't let me come visit at the house until she painted and cleaned real good and she herself pulled all the carpet up saying the floor was better than the carpet.

I miss my grand daughter so much along with my husband but we don't want her to get involved and have her mother get upset with her and I'm still hating to call ex. So we just pray our grand daughter will remember all the love and things we have done. and she has never been on any type of meds for her health as far as we know

I still can't understand why you don't follow up with this legally. As grandparents you have visitation rights. You might not even need a lawyer in your state to make this request to the court. You are automatically entitled unless there is something untoward in your background to prevent it . . . which I doubt exists in your case. If you want to see your granddaughter, you have several options.