Community Chat

[Free2be]

One of the posts here mentions men not feeling able or weak to ask for help from counselors -- this is true.  In my husband's practice, I'd guess at least 90% of his clients have been female and of the 10%, probably half were court-ordered to engage in therapy, did not want it and gained little from it.  How sad is that?  The men who have done well in therapy were a joy to work with, so good to know their feelings are valid and they don't have to be perfect to have value.

There is an overabundance of Stubborn, people digging in their heels, fighting what they can't control, insisting their way is the only way.  Biology can be a factor in some cases but more so society sets men up to perform, to be succcessful, to look good, at a time when success is increasingly elusive.

Ads and social media play a huge part in setting us all up in various ways.  Accept what is, live in the now, do the right thing, and allow compassion instead of blame.  Men have a harder time if they have nobody to be real with or to get enough guidance to feel adequate. 

[Sooner]

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@QueenDanceALot wrote:

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@SeaMaiden wrote:

Testosterone.  Makes the male aggressive and reactive. That is why their is so much war and killing. Yes, women can fight in a war too, but women for the most part are not drawn to fighting and killing IN GENERAL.

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Women aren't drawn to fighting?

This board often indicates quite the opposite.

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Well, it's just done in different ways isn't it?????   LOL!!!  Sorry, but I had to laugh at this one.  

[ROMARY]

I'm back..........Going back to Lilac's original post/thread:  As I've said before and still think so:  As far as violence using g*ns, I still believe that more men are the top culprits only because the people who purchase, carry, and use g*ns are mostly men.  Something tells me that if more women carry, could be that their statistics would significantly rise.  In my mind, that's one of the top reasons why.   Can't help my way of thinking right now.  (Right or wrong, of course.)

[Teddie]

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@ROMARY wrote:

I'm back..........Going back to Lilac's original post/thread:  As I've said before and still think so:  As far as violence using g*ns, I still believe that more men are the top culprits only because the people who purchase, carry, and use g*ns are mostly men.  Something tells me that if more women carry, could be that their statistics would significantly rise.  In my mind, that's one of the top reasons why.   Can't help my way of thinking right now.  (Right or wrong, of course.)

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I don't think gun ownership will encourage people to shoot people. I think if you have it in you to kill, you will. Most people don't, thankfully. 

[Noel7]

Women arguing is a far cry from throwing acid in a woman's face, sexual assault or murder.

A nasty remark is not even in the same category as violence, period.

[jeanlake]

All of the above! Best guess is you've all raised excellent points. I like men, have a brother, raised by a widowed dad, been married 38 years, have a son and three grandsons. The concerns you've raised cross my mind a lot. Something to think about is the control factor. Liking to be in control, males will often go to great links to stay in control. Even if that means creating chaos and crossing ethics lines. It's created a mess in our modern world.  IMO  

[Teddie]

If I had to choose (and I don't want to), I would rather someone talked mean to me than get shot. 

I do think women are more crafty with their words, since it's been said women are more verbal. Words can feel loving and healing or feel like spears. The Bible talks about our tongue and how it's used. Wise words. : )

[Katcat1]

I blame the news media to a certain degree and Hollywood when they come out with violent movies.  There was one movie with Leonardo DeCaprio in a black, long coat dreaming that he shot up students or whatever it was as I did not see the movie but heard about it and some kid got the idea to wear the long, black coat and got a hold of a gun and came to school shooting students.  It is so sad that it has come to this that people are unhappy so they decide to kill other people and then take their life.  Unbelievable..  Yes, it is usually men or boys.     Hollywood does not need to produce violent movies that give ideas to young, sick boys.

[ROMARY]

I think that some (underline 'some') people (men and women) easily 'fly off the handle'.   If they happen to have a weapon handy, could be that they will use it.  Could be an ash tray, a lamp, or whatever else is handy/nearby.   And, yes, if it's in their nature to hastily retaliate or start something, it's just a matter of time.  .........Well, right now we really don't know how to figure out who, what, why, when.....   It's getting to be the Wild West all over again.  I'm not a history buff, but what/who/how in the heck thankfully stopped the 'Wild, Wild West' era?  I often think about this, but never sat down and spent any time to research.