Community Chat

[Shorty2U]

I love my husband dearly but he can be so stubborn.

He has back pain for days. He has been going to work and when he comes home he can barely walk! (He is a boss at a manufacturing plant and he is on his feet all day on cement floors and walks a lot on those cement floors).

Once he sits down and gets back up hes all bent over. I suggested (3X) that he call the Dr. but nope.

He just pops over the counter medicine. (And this has happened before so IMO he should get it checked out and get an MRI to see whats going on).

I have a very bad back for years. So I gave him tips. Try ice, heat, lay in bed on your side in a fetal position w a pillow between your knees. Try my tens unit.

All he did was put ice on it and say hes quote fine. Hes not fine, take it from me, I know back pain and the look on his face is that of agony.

I just don't get why is it some men wont call the Dr. when they don't feel well? (My Dad ws the same way) Why? Because its wimpy? They don't want to admit they need help? What is it?

PS) My husband is not the macho type @ all. Hes very laid back. He does see a Dr. for his asthma/allergies. But when hes sick or in pain, nope, he doesn't call.

Oh and it was very interesting grocery shopping yesterday. I cant lift, he shouldn't be lifting right now. We had the grocery clerk pack the bags lightly that we had 10 bags. So for the time being we are now we are two peas in a pod.

[Elstongunn]

Boy, standing on one's feet all day on cement or any other hard surface is going to cause back aches and pain!

Has he tried orthotics? I finally (after years of different shoes, etc.) purchased Danskos, and with their built-in support/arch support, my back pain went away. It altered the way I stood on my feet, and that was all that was needed.

Men don't really like to go to the doctors for a variety of reasons...fear, indifference, thinking it will go away on its own, etc. Sure, a ton of pain relievers will lessen the pain, but why spend all of that money and take all those drugs if all one needs is a different pair or shoes or some orthotics?

Hope he finds a solution. That kind of pain is no fun at all, and after awhile it doesn't go away.

[Kalli]

In my experience, men don't want to admit any physical frailty whatsoever. If they don't go to the dr, then there's really nothing wrong, right? As long as they don't have an official diagnosis, then all is fine!

[Topaz Gem]

Men don't like to face their own mortality. They think that if they don't go, they won't have to deal with whatever is going on.

[DoneTryin]

It's a male thing with most species - showing illness/injury/pain makes them look weak & therefore leaves them vulnerable to having what's theirs taken away by a stronger, healthier male.

In the competitive workplace, same thing - they're afraid they'll be replaced by younger/stronger/healthier, etc. so they don't want to miss work.

My dad was like that. Didn't do him much good though, since he died early at age 52.

[YorkieonmyPillow]

It isn't just men. My late MIL never went to the doctor.

[hckynut]

As a male, I too have wondered and worked on finding this answer. Many oy my male friends and co-workers bragged, "I haven't been to a doctor in XYZ". Can't tell you how many times I have used by soapbox over the decades, but I can tell you I have had many successful health sermons on "the box".

Females are generally more familiar with a doctor poking and prodding, males, not so much. Could give my novella version of my experiences with this in my lifetime, not this time.

[Preds]

My DH is much better at going to the doctor. I am the one that won't go. After I sit for a bit I have a hard time getting up. Once I'm up and moving, I'm okay. I know some of my back trouble and I do have a fear of finding out more. Maybe that is why your DH won't go.

[hckynut]

Preds my hockey friend, As one that has had 3 ruptured spinal discs removed, I am here to tell the majority of back issues are not near this serious. Most back issues can he resolved by the correct spinal exercises, and it is much easier to prevent them than it is to recover from them.

Here's the tired saying, but I will use it anyways: "Knowledge is Power", and the sooner a person addresses a potential problem, the better off they will be down the road. Good luck to your Team!

[Lindsays Grandma]

My father wouldn't go the doctor no matter how sick he was...my mother on the other hand went whenever she felt a slight pain and told the doctor what her problem was. I wonder if it is that men feel it is not manly to go to the doctor. They do themselves a great disservice by not seeking medical help but telling them that falls on deaf ears.