Community Chat

[IdoraLiz]

I am unsure of how to handle a situation...I have been friends with a married couple for over 15 years. We have shared everything. When it comes to $$$ they are extremely greedy and selfish. This is the only issue I have with them. Where on the other hand, I am overly generous. I tend to share my good fortunes and really enjoy giving gifts. (while they don't...and I understand that) that's just the way we are. I recently became handicapped. I am having issues with walking and standing. I needed a Walker with wheels and a seat, a cane and a Bath seat. These friends have these items left over from their deceased Mother. I went to get them at the Medical Supply and found out that Medicare will no longer pay for the Walker/Rollator. I told my friends about it...they reminded me that they had these items in the basement and had no use for them. I was thrilled and asked if I might "borrow" them for awhile, until I got rehab. The husband told me that he would sell them to me for such and such amount of money. I was offended and really hurt. (they are in a much, much better financial situation, then we are). Hubby and I are both disabled and really struggling. Yet we have always been very generous with them. When I told them that we couldn't buy the items, they said I could still "borrow" the tub seat. (not the walker nor cane). I have been housebound and unable to go anywhere that doesn't have a wheelchair or other walking aid...and I found that MANY places Iwent didn't have aids. They were aware of this and had sympathized previously.

I am so hurt that these items have been sitting there this entire two months that I have had walking issues...and they never mentioned them to me before. Now, when I tell them the Doc ordered them again, they mentioned they have them, stored, and have had them, for three years, and are willing to let me use them. When I accept, they want to charge for them. We aren't talking about borrowing sugar or eggs, etc. We are talking about walking aids.

By the way, our Church had the items available to me....I mentioned it to them and within 24 hours, they dropped them off...for free. I can use them as long as I need to.

Am I being overly sensitive? They are no longer speaking with us. What should I do?

[Bobbi sue]

They are not friends to be so insensitive. Consider the source. The church was kind enough to provide the items to you free of cost. Stay away from your so-called friends and enjoy life. Good luck to you.

[Peaches McPhee]

Why are they no longer speaking to you? Because you did not buy their equipment? Some friends you got there.

You don't have to do anything, except accept the fact that they are not your friends, afterall. I know that is hard. It is hard to image "friends" being so petty about $$ and sharing.

Glad you got your equipment, though.

[Hoovermom]

Personally, I think I would see the handwriting on the wall. Wait for them to call and if they say anything, tell them politely how you are feeling. You have nothing to lose. I am sorry this has happened to you especially during this difficult time.

[chrystaltree]

Well, first there's more to your history with them. A lot more. I don't think I would say that you are being over sensitive, I do think like a dog with a bone, you just hang on to the thing and won't let go. You inquired about the equipment, they said they would sell it to your or lend you some of it. Why did you feel the need to continue? They said what they had to say. Friends or not, they owe you nothing. Their financial status is totally irrelevant. The fact that the things were in the basment gathering dust is irrelevant. It's their "stuff". I must say that while you think of them as "friends", they aren't friends. Not real friends. And this thing is colored by your history with them, which obviously isn't as lovey dovey as you seem to think it is. Make peace with it, let it go. You got want you needed from your church. There's no need to dwell on the situation with your so called friends.

[hsawaknow]

You may have thought they were your 'friends' but a true friend - with deep histories and relationships wouldn't do that. Consider them not speaking to you anymore as a favor. Do you really want a friendship with them now knowing who they really are? I know I wouldn't.

[DeLaney]

Can't have come as much of a shock, since you've long known they suffer in the bondage of greed. . . Still I am sorry their weakness was demonstrated to you under such painful circumstances.

What to do? Were it me, I'd give thanks to God for providing, and that you need not depend on them. Forgive them for their shortcomings and move on. Only you know if continuing this friendship is worth the risk of being hurt by their stinginess in the future.

[HiLo]

What I can't understand is that these people have shown good will towards you in the past. And why are they the ones not speaking to you; did you have harsh words about this in the end?

I would have to know more about the situation before offering an opinion; something just doesn't seem right here. Otherwise you obviously don't have a "friendship" with these people. I find that your church friends are usually the most receptive but then there are exceptions with that as well. You can really learn a lot about people in general just from being on this community.Anyone in need is welcome to anything I have that would help them; certainly things I'm not using, at no charge.

Praying for God's help with your health problem; makes me so sad.for you and that it seems there are so many people in this world with the "me" attitude of your former "friends'.

[BellaPaprika]

Medicare.gov is the government website for Medicare and has the very latest info regarding Part B Medicare coverage. It states there that walker/rollators are covered if ordered by your doctor for a specific mobility issue. You either received the wrong info from the medical supply place or your doctor did not specify a rolling walker in his order.

[occasionalrain]

You have a valid reason to be hurt.

That you finally faced the fact that these people are not friends but opportunists is a gift from G. Appreciate it, consider this couple strangers, and have nothing more to do with them.