Community Chat

[jubilant]

One of the things that ran through my mind when I read this was the saying, "Not seeing the forest for the trees". Which to me would be being so wrapped up in one's own thinking that you can't consider anything else.  So much so that it comes down to only one way of thinking and reasoning because you can't weigh anyone elses opinion against what you don't see. Therefore everything you think is  what you have to think to remain positive.

[ALRATIBA]

I haven't a clue -

I just ignore opinions I don't agree with.  No point in arguing because I'm never gong to change my opinions.  

I googled:

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The phrase “toxic positivity” refers to the concept that keeping positive, and keeping positive only, is the right way to live your life. It means only focusing on positive things and rejecting anything that may trigger negative emotions.

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The "psychology group" says:

 We define toxic positivity as the excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. The process of toxic positivity results in the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience.

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The "wellmind" says:

Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. It's a "good vibes only" approach to life. And while there are benefits to being an optimist and engaging in positive thinking, toxic positivity instead rejects difficult emotions in favor of a cheerful, often falsely positive, facade.

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I still haven't a clue ... and really don't care.

[suzyQ3]

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@GrailSeeker wrote:

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@suzyQ3 wrote:

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@GrailSeeker wrote:

I recently came across the term "toxic positivity" for the first time during a podcast.

When I thought about toxic positivity, I thought of the black and white yin and yang, and thought how if you fail to see the dark side, you fail to see the whole, thus not getting a true or accurate picture of reality.  We balance through the ability to see both sides.

Lately I am noticing a trend to minimize dissenting opinions about all kinds of little things by referring to such opinions as shameful or nasty, when nothing shameful or nasty at all was said. It was  just a dissenting opinion. 

When the words shameful and nasty were used, they appeared to be in effort to support the positive opinion by severely minimizing the opinion that said "no" by calling it shameful and nasty. 

To me, this is an example of toxic positivity.   How would you define the term toxic positivity?  

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@GrailSeeker, I got a little lost in this paragraph.

Otherwise, I think that, as always, we have to pinpoint rather than generalize. I'd have to read or hear the original statement or opinion before judging any reaction.

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Maybe you will come across what I am referring to if you are aware of the terms I referred to.  Not any one thread.

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@GrailSeekerJust to be clear, when I said that I'd have to read or here the original statement, I wasn't referring to threads here.

[GrailSeeker]

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@suzyQ3 wrote:

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@GrailSeeker wrote:

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@suzyQ3 wrote:

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@GrailSeeker wrote:

I recently came across the term "toxic positivity" for the first time during a podcast.

When I thought about toxic positivity, I thought of the black and white yin and yang, and thought how if you fail to see the dark side, you fail to see the whole, thus not getting a true or accurate picture of reality.  We balance through the ability to see both sides.

Lately I am noticing a trend to minimize dissenting opinions about all kinds of little things by referring to such opinions as shameful or nasty, when nothing shameful or nasty at all was said. It was  just a dissenting opinion. 

When the words shameful and nasty were used, they appeared to be in effort to support the positive opinion by severely minimizing the opinion that said "no" by calling it shameful and nasty. 

To me, this is an example of toxic positivity.   How would you define the term toxic positivity?  

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@GrailSeeker, I got a little lost in this paragraph.

Otherwise, I think that, as always, we have to pinpoint rather than generalize. I'd have to read or hear the original statement or opinion before judging any reaction.

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Maybe you will come across what I am referring to if you are aware of the terms I referred to.  Not any one thread.

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@GrailSeekerJust to be clear, when I said that I'd have to read or here the original statement, I wasn't referring to threads here.

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That's OK, I didn't have an original statement in mind in what I meant.

[Foxxee]

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@willdob3 wrote:

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@Foxxee wrote:

A pessimist's label for someone with a positive attitude.

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@Foxxee 

No, I don’t think this is correct. 

An example is someone telling the person who has just lost his leg to be grateful because he still has the other leg. Or telling someone who has lost his home to be thankful he can live out of his car because not everyone who is homeless has a car.

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@willdob3 

Yes, but your example...loss of a leg, would cause someone to be pessimistic.  Substitute the words someone "upset" or "grieving" for pessimist.  Under those circumstances it's difficult to see the situation improving.  It's difficult to be optimistic. 

Those who come off as positive or optimistic during a time like this...your example..."You should be grateful you have the other leg", are very annoying and have no empathy for someone who has.  Optimists are toxic to someone upset or grieving.

I know, I have been in a somewhat similar situation...didn't lose my leg, but was grieving.  I was very pessimistic at the time...couldn't see the sun.  I wanted to get away from this annoying person.  

I don't even think these people are positive or optimists. This tactic is belittling others, making them feel less important, inferior, than yourself.  It's cruel, but the way they do it appears to others as positivity.  

Another example are chronic pessimists who see your average normal positive person a thorn in their sides.

[ALRATIBA]

Replying to myself .... re-reading my google results ... I've come to the conclusion that my having a positive outlook on life may be toxic to the people who are always looking at the dark side of things  People I call "crepe hangers."

Google the urban dictionary if you don't know what a "crepe hanger" is.

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@ALRATIBA wrote:

I haven't a clue -

I just ignore opinions I don't agree with.  No point in arguing because I'm never gong to change my opinions.  

I googled:

---------------------------------------------

The phrase “toxic positivity” refers to the concept that keeping positive, and keeping positive only, is the right way to live your life. It means only focusing on positive things and rejecting anything that may trigger negative emotions.

--------------------------------------------

The "psychology group" says:

 We define toxic positivity as the excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. The process of toxic positivity results in the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience.

--------------------------------------------

The "wellmind" says:

Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. It's a "good vibes only" approach to life. And while there are benefits to being an optimist and engaging in positive thinking, toxic positivity instead rejects difficult emotions in favor of a cheerful, often falsely positive, facade.

-------------------------------------------

I still haven't a clue ... and really don't care.

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[hckynut]

@ALRATIBA 

You saying "replying to myself".  Here is me. I have had a positive outlook on life for as far back as I can remember, and old enough to legally make my own choices.

Optimist/Positivist, to me mean pretty much the same thing. Throw in the word "toxic" and that changes the whole meaning to me.

How or what other adults choose to believe or live?  That is up to them, unless it infringes on my choices in my life, in this great free country.  🇺🇸

hckynut 

[GrailSeeker]

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@ALRATIBA wrote:

Replying to myself .... re-reading my google results ... I've come to the conclusion that my having a positive outlook on life may be toxic to the people who are always looking at the dark side of things  People I call "crepe hangers."

Google the urban dictionary if you don't know what a "crepe hanger" is.

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@ALRATIBA wrote:

I haven't a clue -

I just ignore opinions I don't agree with.  No point in arguing because I'm never gong to change my opinions.  

I googled:

---------------------------------------------

The phrase “toxic positivity” refers to the concept that keeping positive, and keeping positive only, is the right way to live your life. It means only focusing on positive things and rejecting anything that may trigger negative emotions.

--------------------------------------------

The "psychology group" says:

 We define toxic positivity as the excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. The process of toxic positivity results in the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience.

--------------------------------------------

The "wellmind" says:

Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. It's a "good vibes only" approach to life. And while there are benefits to being an optimist and engaging in positive thinking, toxic positivity instead rejects difficult emotions in favor of a cheerful, often falsely positive, facade.

-------------------------------------------

I still haven't a clue ... and really don't care.

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I had not heard of the term "crepe hanger" before, but that's one to keep in mind. 

[Porcelain]

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@ALRATIBA wrote:

Replying to myself .... re-reading my google results ... I've come to the conclusion that my having a positive outlook on life may be toxic to the people who are always looking at the dark side of things  People I call "crepe hangers."

Google the urban dictionary if you don't know what a "crepe hanger" is.

--------------------------------------------------

---

@ALRATIBA wrote:

I haven't a clue -

I just ignore opinions I don't agree with.  No point in arguing because I'm never gong to change my opinions.  

I googled:

---------------------------------------------

The phrase “toxic positivity” refers to the concept that keeping positive, and keeping positive only, is the right way to live your life. It means only focusing on positive things and rejecting anything that may trigger negative emotions.

--------------------------------------------

The "psychology group" says:

 We define toxic positivity as the excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. The process of toxic positivity results in the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience.

--------------------------------------------

The "wellmind" says:

Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. It's a "good vibes only" approach to life. And while there are benefits to being an optimist and engaging in positive thinking, toxic positivity instead rejects difficult emotions in favor of a cheerful, often falsely positive, facade.

-------------------------------------------

I still haven't a clue ... and really don't care.

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I call those people despair trolls, usually just in my head, not out loud. They take one bad event and awfulize it to mean society is "DONE!" or that people are horrible or that justice and decency will never prevail. In groups, whether in person or online, they are sooooooo tiring. All saying the same doomy message that nothing will ever get better and they're giving up. I see it as the opposite side of the toxic positivity coin. I just think that anything good, when taken way too far, becomes bad.

[ROMARY]

Ran across Joel Ost**n this morning.

re: 'Control Your Atmosphere'.  

Interesting and helpful, imo.

Anyway, I've noticed, throughout my long years, (before recent controversies, etc.), that some people (underline 'some') just cannot stand genuinely 'nice' people's natural demeanor.

Why? I don't know.

But, it's something that must bother some  people.  

People have told me that it's because they just cannot 'be' (genuinely) kind, thoughtful, empathetic.  So it's possibly a 'threat' ? in their own minds.

Well, just thought I'd throw it into today's mix.........

Again, not implying anything somewhat newly controversial, just what I've observed in my life.  All of those years and years, etc.

Each of us has our own experiences, good or bad or something in-between.

Keep safe and well. 

Happy Valentine's Day to all.