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09-03-2021 10:16 PM
@reiki604 wrote:@Ladygray I would address the concerns with the therapist. If you can't be honest with your therapist, who can you be honest with? Could one of your issues be an inability to stand up for yourself? Here is a safe space to address and deal with it. Tell her you want her complete attention without the distractions you hear in the background and how important it is to you that she respect your appointment times. If she gets defensive or gives excuses and refuses to address your concerns, it's. time to find a new therapist.
This is really mind-boggling. FINALLY someone -- @reiki604 -- suggested that Ladygray discuss this with her therapist!
I can't believe anyone thought she should report the therapist -- or find another one -- without taking the time to fully discuss her dissatisfaction with the sessions and find out what this person has to say.
My guess is that if she called the EAP/insurance company to register a complaint, the first thing they will ask is when she discussed this with the therapist, what was the outcome of the conversation. How else do you plan to sort this out? .
OMG, What is your reluctance with having an honest conversation with this person? It's entirely possible adjustments can be made and the situation improves dramatically. And you get what you need because you asked for it.
09-04-2021 07:09 AM
My son is an MSW therapist. I can't imagine him doing this but that's him.
1. Talk to your therapist about this. Ask for what you need.
2. Talking to your insurance company as one suggested is not appropriate. It is not their job or within their realm of duties to know about or handle this.
3. Find a new therapist if your conversation about this doesn't go well.
09-04-2021 07:05 PM - edited 09-04-2021 08:21 PM
This is what I would do - protect my privacy, and hopefully receive better care.
Contact the insurance company, or whoever does the scheduling, and request a change in therapists - no reason given. “It’s just not working out” - Is enough.
Given the circumstances you described personal privacy is in your best interests. Notifying the Company, or Company executive about the service might very well backfire. Trying to ‘help’ the therapist improve her professional techniques may also have unforeseen repercussions.
You describe a work situation and manager type with which I’m familiar. Sounds as if questioning, or raising concerns is not seen as healthy, or welcome, and trying to fix things is seen as meddling.
Best Wishes!
09-04-2021 07:54 PM
My opinion is to discuss how you are feeling about her treatment of you honestly with her. Clear the air, see if you both can come to a new understanding - if not - then this therapist should be reported. Give this a try - as you seem to like her advice - before closing the door.
Wishing you the best.
09-04-2021 08:19 PM
@Ladygrayif she is helping you I too would just confront her (with love and light - hahah got that from a movie) and ask her if she is multi-tasking. I'm sure she's wearing earbuds and no one is hearing your conversation when she is getting rung up. But, there's no harm in asking as she may have a very good reason. If you let her know it makes you uncomfortable I'm sure she will do better.
09-04-2021 09:11 PM
I'd do two things. First, I'd talk to her about the issues you raised in your post. She's being paid for this therapy, and you have a right to expect more from her. Second, I don't understand why you can't meet with her in her office (unless she isn't in the same area that you are). I personally don't think Covid is an excuse for not being able to see a health professional. We have masks, vaccines and safe distancing. Obviously she's not afraid to venture outside of her home, and neither are you since you're going to your worksite.
09-04-2021 09:22 PM
@CatsyCline wrote:@Ladygray if you want to have therapy, my strong advice is to start over and go with an independant therapist. EAP is provided by your company's insurer. Think about it.
In addition, the EAP therapist is being, imo, somewhat passive aggressive. Being late repeatedly, inappropriate therapy visits. Perhaps she has had second thoughts about sessions with you - for whatever reason. Maybe she WANTS you to call her out on it! Maybe you need to be a bit assertive with her. Maybe with your boss?
Whatever you do, trust me on this re: your boss. keep things close to the vest at work. Avoid venting about your boss to co-workers, anyone. Play the game. i'm certain you know this already.
For my own reasons, i do not completely trust EAP. i have had therapy using EAP (through former employment, also with a [narcissist psycho] micromanaging boss who made my life miserable) I sought therapy on my own.
☝🏻This
09-05-2021 12:35 AM
I don't know if anyone else suggested this but maybe ask her if you can do Facetime for your sessions and then she would have to pay attention to only you.
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