Struggling with a lack of interest and initiative.....

Barney2273 · ‎02-09-2017

I had always been type A and driven, somewhat perfectionistic until the last year after the death of my mother and ongoing demise of my 81 year old father. I'm mid 50's. I just don't know how to get the "old me" back. Yes I'm overwhelmed with so much more to be responsible for, and yes I have engaged my physician for medication. What do you real life ladies think? I need advice to help me get my mojo back.

FastDogWalker2 · ‎03-10-2010

I understand your struggle and I am sorry. Same age here and I too face struggles due to family circumstances. I am eager to hear some "real" life advice too - good topic.

Sweet_Serenity · ‎01-22-2016

My condolences for your loss. Though I'm not able to give advice on what your experiencing caring for aging parent. I do know that life can be overwhelming. You did the right thing sharing your feelings. Today I did the same, Helped me immensely. Hang in there!💗

ChynnaBlue · ‎05-22-2012

I'm glad you talked to a doctor about medication. Medication for depression can be just as frustrating as depression. It can take a long time to figure out what works best for you and there can be a lot of trial and error. I recommend some talk therapy while you figure that out. For some people, that alone works and for some, medication alone works. The medication route can be long and bumpy and can even make people temporarily feel worse, so it's good to have support during that time.

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Nancy Drew · ‎03-11-2010

YouTube. You would be amazed at the help you can get watching life skills tips.You have to weed out the ones that don't feel right but when it clicks it really helps. Start with perfection and how that does not work, caring for an elderly parent.

Wrong is still wrong just because you benefited from it.

Catty2 · ‎09-06-2014

I'm so sorryfor your loss. Have you thought about a grief support group? Or seeing a counselor? Wishing you all the best. Take care.

Msfitness · ‎09-12-2015

I am so sorry to hear that you lost your Mother and that your dad is ailing. I feel your pain and I understand your struggle because I lost my Mother 3 years ago. I don't have the drive as I used to do either. I went to counseling and that helped some and I did not want medication when my doctor asked me. That won't help me because I need to get out and be active. It will come back to us. It may take us longer than others to pull ourselves together. You are going through a lot right now.

fortune · ‎03-14-2010

@ChynnaBlue wrote:
I'm glad you talked to a doctor about medication. Medication for depression can be just as frustrating as depression. It can take a long time to figure out what works best for you and there can be a lot of trial and error. I recommend some talk therapy while you figure that out. For some people, that alone works and for some, medication alone works. The medication route can be long and bumpy and can even make people temporarily feel worse, so it's good to have support during that time.

@ChynnaBlue

Some medications, like Prosac take 4-6 weeks to start working.

akaburtonfan · ‎12-08-2013

@Barney2273 -- I am feeling the same way you are. I lost my dad after a very lenghty illness, lost my mom unexpectedly and have a sibling with a terminal illness.

I have been a stay at home mom to 1 child who moved across the country shortly after my mom passed. I have no relatives living near me (there are very few left) and because I've been a sahm have no real friends. Needless to say I have been living a very isolated life as of late.

The only difference between me and you is that I was never a type A person. I have been in counseling but somehow that seemed to make me feel worse.

I take one day at a time and try to just keep on going -- the struggle is real!!

I hope you find something to help you get back to your old self.

Lilysmom · ‎03-09-2010

@Barney2273, I am so sorry that you are having to deal with these issues. Here is my story.

When I retired, I had one piece of bad news after another. First, my sister was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimers. Six months later, my brother was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and six months later my oldest brother was diagnosed with ALS. Within 18 months, all three were dead. I was a major support to the families. It got so bad, I wound up in Emergency with an issue and was placed on bedrest for a week. I did almost all the cooking for one family, all the hospital and treatment vists, cooked meals, etc. I had to travel two hours to assist another family. It was exhausting.

The point of my story is that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Try to take it one day at a time. Take care of yourself so you can care for your loved ones. If you need a break, take one. If people offer to help, let. them. I thought the dark cloud would never leave but, eventually, things got better.

I will pray for you and your dad. God bless. LM