Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,525
Registered: ‎01-25-2023

I think it is a great way to get that awkward moment out of the way. We often go out with friends and getting that done upfront is terrific. If we are picking up the check we will normally speak to our waiter upfront, we get there a bit early and just tell him that it is our check. 

Critter Lover! (especially cats!)
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,408
Registered: ‎10-30-2010

I would not be insulted. Unless, I am treating and picking up the tab. I always ask for separate checks when out with friends. As others have mentioned the wait staff prefer to know about this up front. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,782
Registered: ‎11-24-2013

@Kitty Galore  Huh? My late DH and I, and all of our friends, couples or singles, ALWAYS got separate checks unless it was decided ahead of time that someone was treating.


Insulting? That's just weird to me.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 771
Registered: ‎08-15-2022

We have always split the check......ALWAYS !

Most of our friends drink, we don't.....some of us love our desert and appetizers,ME .....

It all works out in the end (or doesn't) is never an issue for us !

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,267
Registered: ‎11-16-2014

@Kitty Galore wrote:

I have a very good friend,  we've been friends for all of our lives since we were young.  We went out to dinner with our husbands her husband immediately as soon as the waiter greeted us asked for separate checks .   My friend didn't seem to think anything of it . My husband and I were very surprised, my husband found it insulting .   I've never been out with couples where that was asked ,  we always just split the bill however many of us couples there are , friends or family.  Now when her and I go out to lunch just us we split our bill at her suggestion .    Maybe many people do this I've just never come across it til now .  🤔


I was brought up by a dad who told me you should not eat out if you need to ask for separate checks. Actually, I have eaten out frequently in my 70 years on the planet and the majority of times, we alternate who pays. Never encountered ever a time anyone asking for a separate check. Even when my friends were struggling with new careers we always split the bill or my husband and myself just picked up the tab.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 41,164
Registered: ‎01-08-2011

At the end of the meal when the wait staff asks, DH tells them we're on a seperate check.


One reason we pay our own bill is we order drinks.


I wouldn't let anyone pay my bar bill or expect them to.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,366
Registered: ‎10-05-2010

My friends and I just split the total by the number of people, but I wouldn't think anything of it if someone asked for separate checks. But when I used to go out with other couples,  those men would never think of asking for separate checks. 

Regular Contributor
Posts: 182
Registered: ‎04-29-2015

Once when I was still working, a group went out for a birthday lunch, including our boss. I didn't care for the type of food, so I got a lunch salad and water. Boss ordered several appetizers and desserts, none of which I ate. She picked up the tab and then sent us all an email with what we owed her....yup, my salad and water cost me $22--and that was a good 20 years ago!


After that, I was always very very busy when birthdays came around! Very busy!!


Regular Contributor
Posts: 229
Registered: ‎12-28-2018

I have a friend with whom I have regular dinners.  We always ask for separate checks.  I also have a group of 4-5 of us who have breakfast and we don't get separate checks as we each take a turn paying for the entire bill.  I don't find it insulting to ask for separate checks.  I'd rather get the points on my credit card and order whatever I want.

Super Contributor
Posts: 406
Registered: ‎05-09-2023

I'm with you OP. I would find it odd and very inconveniencing to the server. We always split the check by number of couples. It doesn't matter who ate or drank what. Generally, we'll all order different apps, bottles of wine, bottled water for the table, so it would be difficult to keep all that on separate bills.

We add in the 20% for tip and split the entire bill 2 or 3 or 4 ways. 

I don't think I've ever gone to dinner with anyone who asked for a separate check. At least not in my adult life. But to each their own.