Community Chat

[Clover29]

"Well then he tells me he has to delete me as a friend because she's [a married woman] being a problem and he'll straighten it out and in a few days we'll be friends again"

How old is he? Five? (Yes, I know he's 58. But that's just his chronological age.)

[bells4me]

I think you know the answer or you wouldn't be asking for advice. He is a user, don't waste your time. If she calls him he will be gone. MOVE ON!

[Raindrop7]

Well ladies I've decided I've had enough. I'm not happy and probably never loved him if I haven't had feelings for a couple of months. And I can't ignore the red flags anymore. I don't need him and don't want him anymore. His next trip here will be to pick up the few things that are here. I will have a friend with me and I will change the locks.

I will hurt for while but I've been on my own for long time and will be fine again. To be honest I was a little surprised no one here gave him the benefit of the doubt. That goes to show how he had me believing his pathetic lies and excuses. He's very good at manipulating. Let him go manipulate someone else. This woman deserves better.

Thank you all for helping me open my eyes to the truth.

[missy1]

Too many red flags. Do not settle. Your only 48. Maybe just FWB?

[Raindrop7]

On 4/30/2014 missyw1 said: Too many red flags. Do not settle. Your only 48. Maybe just FWB?

Fwb? He's too cheap to pay for Viagra and he can't get anymore free samples.

[goodstuff]

You are ill, shut in, and obviously lonely.......but trust me: a relationship with this guy won't help. I'm betting the problems he has mentioned to you (debts, poor earning, compicated past relationships, overdependency on his mother, and more) are only the tip of the iceberg, and I'm betting the dysfunctional relationship with his mother and family are worse than you can even imagine.

RUN, walk, or wobble away as fast as ever you can, my dear. You're toying with disaster here. Don't wait a minute. End this right now before it eats you alive.

[Marienkaefer2]

On 4/30/2014 Raindrop said:

Well ladies I've decided I've had enough. I'm not happy and probably never loved him if I haven't had feelings for a couple of months. And I can't ignore the red flags anymore. I don't need him and don't want him anymore. His next trip here will be to pick up the few things that are here. I will have a friend with me and I will change the locks.

I will hurt for while but I've been on my own for long time and will be fine again. To be honest I was a little surprised no one here gave him the benefit of the doubt. That goes to show how he had me believing his pathetic lies and excuses. He's very good at manipulating. Let him go manipulate someone else. This woman deserves better.

Thank you all for helping me open my eyes to the truth.

If it walks like a duck....

A good sincere guy wouldn't do the things he did.

It's too bad you couldn't have just shipped his things to him.

If I were you, I would leave them packed on the doorstep. Don't talk to him. Don't "explain."

He may try to weasel himself back into your good graces. Or at the very least make you feel sorry for him. I've been through this myself...the "crying" pitiful act.

Just beware. Don't fall for it.

Signed,

"Been there, done that."

[Raindrop7]

On 4/30/2014 Marienkaefer2 said:

On 4/30/2014 Raindrop said:

Well ladies I've decided I've had enough. I'm not happy and probably never loved him if I haven't had feelings for a couple of months. And I can't ignore the red flags anymore. I don't need him and don't want him anymore. His next trip here will be to pick up the few things that are here. I will have a friend with me and I will change the locks.

I will hurt for while but I've been on my own for long time and will be fine again. To be honest I was a little surprised no one here gave him the benefit of the doubt. That goes to show how he had me believing his pathetic lies and excuses. He's very good at manipulating. Let him go manipulate someone else. This woman deserves better.

Thank you all for helping me open my eyes to the truth.

If it walks like a duck....

A good sincere guy wouldn't do the things he did.

It's too bad you couldn't have just shipped his things to him.

If I were you, I would leave them packed on the doorstep. Don't talk to him. Don't "explain."

He may try to weasel himself back into your good graces. Or at the very least make you feel sorry for him. I've been through this myself...the "crying" pitiful act.

Just beware. Don't fall for it.

Signed,

"Been there, done that."

"Been there, done that", I fully expect him to try to get me to change my mind. I will have to block him on Facebook and block him from my phones. His stuff will be waiting on my porch and I will have no contact with him but I won't be alone. He wanted to control me and my life and also tried to gain some control of my bank account. I'm so done and feel like I should just stay single. :/

[Marienkaefer2]

Raindrop,

You sound like a beautiful person inside and out.

These guys see that and want to take advantage.

I'm glad that you will be strong.

Don't think about being single. Live your life and you never know what doors will open.

ETA: But don't forget the lesson you learned from this guy. Be more discerning in your future relationships. You will be fine!!!

[ROMARY]

Better to change the locks now, as he may decide to 'surprise' you ahead of the planned time to pick up his items.