Community Chat

[Noel7]

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@Deanie wrote:

IMHO, many today are woefully not prepared to deal with the threats that currently exist.  One can blame it on conditioning, be it schools, churches, synagogues, home....it matters not.  Most have been fed a steady stream of false information about the environment in which we live.  We have been told that all people are "basically good"  and trust, and care etc etc.  Animals have a better sense of self preservation than humans do. We have never been taught to rely on our instincts, instead, in many cases, we have been told to ignore our instincts.  Perhaps, what follows then, is the trouble that good, honest, hardworking people experience.  Let me be clear, I am not advocating living ones life afraid, only proposing that perhaps it is time to revisit our frame of reference and use our better judgement along with gut instincts to evaluate situations and make the necessary adjustments in our own behavior.

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Where are you getting that?  I learned those things from both my parents, and my father taught me self defense. 

No one ever told me all people were basically good.  Anyone with half a brain can figure out there's danger out there just by watching the evening news on television.

My daughter is a young adult now.  I helped run a program in her elementary school you may have heard of. "Good Touch, Bad Touch."  All about kids dealing with a predator.  I started her in self defense classes at age 7.

I don't know anyone who didn't teach their children all they could about protecting themselves.  That kind of bury your face in the sand has been over for a long time.  We certainly can't assume everyone is walking around blissfully ignorant.

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[proudlyfromNJ]

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@Deanie wrote:

IMHO, many today are woefully not prepared to deal with the threats that currently exist.  One can blame it on conditioning, be it schools, churches, synagogues, home....it matters not.  Most have been fed a steady stream of false information about the environment in which we live.  We have been told that all people are "basically good"  and trust, and care etc etc.  Animals have a better sense of self preservation than humans do. We have never been taught to rely on our instincts, instead, in many cases, we have been told to ignore our instincts.  Perhaps, what follows then, is the trouble that good, honest, hardworking people experience.  Let me be clear, I am not advocating living ones life afraid, only proposing that perhaps it is time to revisit our frame of reference and use our better judgement along with gut instincts to evaluate situations and make the necessary adjustments in our own behavior.

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I must have missed school or Church when the false information was taught. Never heard anything like this, especially from my parents. 

All you you have to do is read the crime report in your local paper to see that "all people are NOT good".

[Frosted Cake]

Ironic, what do you think?

I had a strange and unnerving situation happen to me this morning on my walk.   I'm being so observant and this happens.

I was walking south on the main street entrance to my complex.   A long median of trees divides the street north/south.  I was walking south on the east side of the median when a man on his bike was on the other side of the median going south also who kept staring at me, riding his back slow to match  my pace.   He was all covered in long pants, long shirt, hat & glasses, so I couldn't get a look at him.   I looked at him and he wasn't moving faster like a bike would against a walker.  

I suddenly stopped in my tracks, not wanting to keep walking in his direction.   I didn't want him following me either.   When I stopped he then stopped and was coming up over the median on his bike.  I yelled at the top of my lungs, "Stay away from me!"   He just laughed and rode off.  

It shook me up so much.  He may not be "that guy" but it was upsetting. He didn't act friendly that whole time.   He didn't smile or wave.  What was curious was when I yelled out he didn't apologize and say he was just being friendly or didn't mean to alarm me, he just laughed.

I called the police and they said he didn't break any laws.  I get that.  She said by stopping he might have thought it was an invitation to talk. I wasn't waving at him or being friendly, I was very unfriendly!   She said yelling was a good idea to get others' attention and take him off guard.  She admitted that him trying to come over the median was as if he was looking to make contact somehow.   She also agreed that the person who moved into the area shouldn't be free and that it's not up to the city, it's a county decision for that from the sheriff's office.

She said to get a whistle.  She also told me, as did a poster here, that mace can backfire on you and cause more problems.   I am going to carry my Dad's old pocket knife now on my walks.

It was so ironic and unnerving to run into this bicyclist.   Who knows, it might have been him.  I've never seen him before.  I took the notice to other neighbors to make sure they got it and fellow walkers and runners to keep an eye out for these things.  They all appreciated my information.    One neighbor said he and his wife saw a man the week before following a lady walking her two poodles.  They made sure they let the man know they were behind him and he then took off a different way.  It also was in broad daylight!

I don't want to feel scared, but it's upsetting to have something you enjoy be marred by having to be so overly cautious.   

By the way, the notice said he was convicted of assaulting and kidnapping adult women who were strangers.   All the more unnerving.

[Noel7]

@Frosted Cake

Did you read the post I put up on this line about a way people in my area are getting rid pf sexual predators in their neighborhood?

From your description of your neighbors, it might be the way for you to go.

[RazorSharp]

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@Frosted Cake wrote:

Ironic, what do you think?

I had a strange and unnerving situation happen to me this morning on my walk.   I'm being so observant and this happens.

I was walking south on the main street entrance to my complex.   A long median of trees divides the street north/south.  I was walking south on the east side of the median when a man on his bike was on the other side of the median going south also who kept staring at me, riding his back slow to match  my pace.   He was all covered in long pants, long shirt, hat & glasses, so I couldn't get a look at him.   I looked at him and he wasn't moving faster like a bike would against a walker.  

I suddenly stopped in my tracks, not wanting to keep walking in his direction.   I didn't want him following me either.   When I stopped he then stopped and was coming up over the median on his bike.  I yelled at the top of my lungs, "Stay away from me!"   He just laughed and rode off.  

It shook me up so much.  He may not be "that guy" but it was upsetting. He didn't act friendly that whole time.   He didn't smile or wave.  What was curious was when I yelled out he didn't apologize and say he was just being friendly or didn't mean to alarm me, he just laughed.

I called the police and they said he didn't break any laws.  I get that.  She said by stopping he might have thought it was an invitation to talk. I wasn't waving at him or being friendly, I was very unfriendly!   She said yelling was a good idea to get others' attention and take him off guard.  She admitted that him trying to come over the median was as if he was looking to make contact somehow.   She also agreed that the person who moved into the area shouldn't be free and that it's not up to the city, it's a county decision for that from the sheriff's office.

She said to get a whistle.  She also told me, as did a poster here, that mace can backfire on you and cause more problems.   I am going to carry my Dad's old pocket knife now on my walks.

It was so ironic and unnerving to run into this bicyclist.   Who knows, it might have been him.  I've never seen him before.  I took the notice to other neighbors to make sure they got it and fellow walkers and runners to keep an eye out for these things.  They all appreciated my information.    One neighbor said he and his wife saw a man the week before following a lady walking her two poodles.  They made sure they let the man know they were behind him and he then took off a different way.  It also was in broad daylight!

I don't want to feel scared, but it's upsetting to have something you enjoy be marred by having to be so overly cautious.   

By the way, the notice said he was convicted of assaulting and kidnapping adult women who were strangers.   All the more unnerving.

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Why don't you find the guy's picture online, so you know who he is?

[Ms X]

You surely don't need me to suggest it, but keep your eyes out when you walk.  I walk along the shore in my neighborhood and in a large beachfront park.  During the winter months, few if any others are visible in the area.  Before I walk down onto a small, secluded beach, I look all over the place so that I'm aware of who is around.  I walk across it for only a couple of minutes and then up a stone stairway. 

I'm a city person and feel very uncomfortable in deserted areas where predators may lurk and no one is around to hear you scream.  When I was 5 and living a couple of miles from a major city, a man in a car asked me where the next street over was.  I pointed the way to him, but he said he didn't understand and wanted me to get into the car and show him.  I still remember it vividly.  Something about him really creeped me out, and I got on my tricycle and escaped as fast as I could.  The street sloped downward toward our apartment, and I remember slamming my bike into the concrete steps and running inside.

You can't be too vigilant.  Modify your travels if you must when it's likely you'll be walking the streets without much company.

[Frosted Cake]

They gave a picture on the flyer, but it's older, the last time he was arrested.

The guy on the bike was all covered up.  There was no way to see his face.

The PD said to me that by now he could have different hair color, etc.  The picture they gave was an arrest photo.

Believe me, as other neighbors have said, they have his face ingrained in their mind now.   The bike guy was all covered up, strange because it was hot this morning, too.

[Q4u]

I am a vocal advocate of self-defense for women.  You don't have to take full on Karate classes, but you can take self-defense, one step defense and you get very good with practice.  Not only do you learn how to use the perp's inertia and weight against them if they are coming at you, you learn pressure points and twisting joints in how to take someone down.  You don't need brute strength, I've seen tiny ladies trip up large heavy males. The entire system is defensive.... not offensive.  AND, it works!  

I used to teach these classes, was a 2nd degree Black Belt in Tang Soo Do and devoted a lot of years to this discipline.  You don't need to be in tip top shape either, or young.... and I have even instructed a lady in a wheel chair.  I can imagine the surprise on the perp's face if he tried to take HER handbag.  Yes, she was limited, but what she could do would absolutly stun you.

So I am with the OP.  Planting these creeps in our neighborhoods is wrong IMHO. But there is something pro-active you can do about it.  Not only will self-defense give you the tools should you ever need it, and I hope you don't ever need it...... but it also gives you supreme confidence that you DO have the tools that will give you enough time to get away!

[Tinkrbl44]

Several years ago I took a women's self defense course from the Beverly Hills Police Dept.   Lots of good tips, but one I still use to this day ........   hold your keys in your hand, with a key pointing out between every finger .... it's like wearing  brass knuckles.   If someone approaches you or comes into your personal space, that fist goes straight to the face, between their eyes.  

The best part is, it looks a little scary if someone is close enough to see what's actually in your hand.  They are more likely to just move on.

For anyone who doesn't know what brass knuckles are, here's a photo.