Community Chat

[Preds]

On 11/3/2014 dooBdoo said:

On 11/3/2014 Preds said:

dooB ... we can't change them just as they can't change us. Just enjoy what you can and don't let it get you down. Nothing and no one is worth that.

Hi, sweetie pie! You have such a wonderful attitude and are so kind to everyone. I admire you more than you know.

It's hard not to let it get me down, I admit that. But I'll say this: I've seen posters work at it until they chase others away ... maybe that's their goal, sure hope it doesn't work.

Thank you. I 've watched them chase posters away and then get their jollies "wondering what happened to them". Seems silly to me, but I guess it's a game for them.

[Free2be]

On 11/3/2014 dooBdoo said:

Something cumulative happens over time when someone has a pattern of being passive-aggressive toward others. After spending a long time trying and hoping to like and respect each and every poster, I finally realized and had to accept that a couple of them spend so much time passive-aggressively demeaning others and then seeking sympathy for themselves that it's sometimes impossible to overlook the repeated unkindness, hypocrisy, and dishonesty. It makes me sad, but it's something I guess we all have to accept if we are to continue to read and post here. No matter how noble or generous we'd like to be, there are times when we have to be clear-eyed about the negative personalities who relish insults and mockery and see them for who they are.

^ This, and posters too often look for a slight or some imagined offense where none was intended and don't take a second to ask before accusing. Add in the argumentative, the proudly uninformed and the supports they get for their ignorance -- it's enough to drive anyone away.

[dooBdoo]

On 11/3/2014 Free2be said:

On 11/3/2014 dooBdoo said:

Something cumulative happens over time when someone has a pattern of being passive-aggressive toward others. After spending a long time trying and hoping to like and respect each and every poster, I finally realized and had to accept that a couple of them spend so much time passive-aggressively demeaning others and then seeking sympathy for themselves that it's sometimes impossible to overlook the repeated unkindness, hypocrisy, and dishonesty. It makes me sad, but it's something I guess we all have to accept if we are to continue to read and post here. No matter how noble or generous we'd like to be, there are times when we have to be clear-eyed about the negative personalities who relish insults and mockery and see them for who they are.

^ This, and posters too often look for a slight or some imagined offense where none was intended and don't take a second to ask before accusing. Add in the argumentative, the proudly uninformed and the supports they get for their ignorance -- it's enough to drive anyone away.

I agree, Free. For me, it's become a good time to take notice and to start talking about the "emperor's new clothes" instead of pretending the problem doesn't exist. I saw your posts last night, and I wanted to say I do hope you continue to post here. We've already lost too many wonderful posters who were tired of the games and decided to leave. You're a valuable contributor and you'd be greatly missed.

[straykatz]

I think the passive agressive term is tossed around here on this boards far too often for it to hold much creedence anymore....and IMO it is often used in the wrong context...and in most cases is a stab at demeaning or chastising the intended and often the unintended too.

Doobdoo....what you post makes a lot of sense.....and I 100% agree that some people have such negative persoanlities that it's impossible to get along with them or reason with them and to try getting along simply wears you out.

[pitdakota]

On 11/3/2014 dooBdoo said:

Something cumulative happens over time when someone has a pattern of being passive-aggressive toward others. After spending a long time trying and hoping to like and respect each and every poster, I finally realized and had to accept that a couple of them spend so much time passive-aggressively demeaning others and then seeking sympathy for themselves that it's sometimes impossible to overlook the repeated unkindness, hypocrisy, and dishonesty. It makes me sad, but it's something I guess we all have to accept if we are to continue to read and post here. No matter how noble or generous we'd like to be, there are times when we have to be clear-eyed about the negative personalities who relish insults and mockery and see them for who they are.

ITA! My parents always encouraged me to realize that not everyone is going to agree with you. Not everyone will like you. But to be true to yourself and always do what you know is right. In the end, that is more valuable than having the many like you or agree with you.

And that is what you do here dooBdoo. But there are negative nellies. There are posters that once you read their posts over time it is clear they demonstrate passive aggressive behaviors (even though I do think that term is over used), there are some that seem to act like they own the board and have to approve of something one way or another, then there are the trolls that dive bomb threads. And then others that subtly reel other posters in, but woe unto you if that poster ever disagree with them. I have seen that happen quite a bit here over time. It is a little bit of everything. So the clear eye is a positive thing.

And has dmod has said many times....when people show you who they are, believe them.

So just post around the negative nellies. You have always had interesting, insightful, and educated posts. Not everyone will appreciate them. But in my opinion, that is their loss.

[raven-blackbird]

to me, a passive aggressive is someone with no courage........they lack the courage of conviction......they lack the courage to stand for something, even if it means you stand against all............................................raven

[misspammie]

simply to me it means a real sweet way to say something to your face,,,but "watch your six"! Very dangerous people in my eye

[Preds]

LIke giving you a big hug while putting the knife in your back!

[raven-blackbird]

On 11/4/2014 misspammie said:

simply to me it means a real sweet way to say something to your face,,,but "watch your six"! Very dangerous people in my eye

Very true statement..............................raven