Community Chat

[spent2much]

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@Spinach wrote:

Would you sign either a pre-nup or post-nup agreement if you were presented with it?

@Spinach No, I would not.  If the man insisted on it, I wouldn't marry him.

[Spinach]

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@spent2much wrote:

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@Spinach wrote:

Would you sign either a pre-nup or post-nup agreement if you were presented with it?

@Spinach No, I would not.  If the man insisted on it, I wouldn't marry him.

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If he had asked for one before we got married I would probably would not have married him either. 

[freakygirl]

'til death do us part? hmmm, the way the world is today, I sadly think that's no longer realistic. besides, what's the harm in covering all bases and being prepared? just because you draw up one doesn't mean you're not going to try your best to make the marriage work. circumstances and feelings may change, but an agreement isn't going to spell doom. 

[Tinkrbl44]

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@Caaareful Shopper wrote:

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a romantic -- and congratulations on your recent marriage! -- but try to see it as "love is love," and "finances are finances."  If neither of you had any assets to speak of, you wouldn't have needed the attornyes to set up trusts in the first place.  Do whatever feels right to you, but since you asked --- take the attorneys advice!  It's totally separate from loving each other and staying together or not.  This way, the finances are taken care of intelligently, and you have nothing to worry about.  I totally disagree that it means you are planning to divorce by signing it.

But what do I know.  I divorced my husband years ago and he had absolutely nothing.  I even gave him money for a used car with his promise to roll straight out of town and not look back.  Never a better dollar spent.  I digress.  So I was never faced with your dilemma.

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@Caaareful Shopper

Excellent post ... some people just don't "get" why these can be necessary ..... or they have little in the way of assets.     It's almost like refusing to buy life insurance because they think they will never die!

[RetRN]

OP, only you can answer this. None of the people responding know your situation. I believe you will make the right decision.

[Tinkrbl44]

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@Spinach wrote:

My husband is not asking for one.  He didn't ask for a pre-nup either.   He has a lot more wealth than I do!  

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@Spinach

That doesn't surprise me.

[Plaid Pants2]

There is nothing wrong in covering your assets.

Afterall, you want to protect what you came in to the marriage with.

As someone else said, just because a post-nup is drawn up and signed, doesn't mean that one isn't going to give their marriage their all.

It just means that in case there is a divorce, the ex-spouse won't take all.

It's like saying, "I don't need car insurance, because I'm certain that I won't get in to an accident".

[Spinach]

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@Tinkrbl44 wrote:

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@Spinach wrote:

My husband is not asking for one.  He didn't ask for a pre-nup either.   He has a lot more wealth than I do!  

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@Spinach

That doesn't surprise me.

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If the  " doesn't surprise me" comment is supposed to be a jab at me, that's not a kind think to say.  I am wealthy in my own right and when I married my first husband, who had nothing, I did not ask for a prenup.  So hope that clears it up for you!  

[HappilyEverAfter]

Congratulations on your wedding!  What you decide to do legally should be between you and your husband. I am a newlywed too! I was married this past December (2nd marriage for both of us) and I wouldn't dare discuss with some of these posters what we decided upon in terms of a pre-nup. 

[Spinach]

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@HappilyEverAfter wrote:

Congratulations on your wedding!  What you decide to do legally should be between you and your husband. I am a newlywed too! I was married this past December (2nd marriage for both of us) and I wouldn't dare discuss with some of these posters what we decided upon in terms of a pre-nup. 

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Congratulations to you too.  You are right, every relationship is different and people tend to respond based on their experiences.  Good luck to you!  Hope you have a very happy and healthy long life together!