Community Chat

[qbetzforreal]

Best wishes, Ford.  You know what's coming and you can plan accordingly.

[Boehm Collector]

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@LilacTree wrote:

@KingstonsMom

My own dear mom, a tiny little thing, vastly intelligent and loving, but damaged, had a horrible childhood too.  She never even knew who her father was, and her mother was a moron and worse.  And my poor mom got cancer at age 49 and died.  My father could be brutal, the typical Italian father who grew up being beaten by his father and gave it to us from time to time with a belt.  He knew nothing else and we forgave him for that, although we were all scared to death of him, which isn't so good.  He mellowed with age.

I am so relieved and happy to hear that you have a loving family now . . . to me that's everything.  I wish you all a joyful holiday!!

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Hi @LilacTree .. really sorry to hear your Dad was brutal.  But I have to respectfully disagree that is the "typical" Italian father.  My entire family came from Italy..... I still know many people.... including family and friends in Italy.  None of the fathers were brutal.  For the most part they were/are extremely loving parents.  My own Dad never laid a hand on us.  All he had to do to discipline us was to give us "the look".  LOL

[LilacTree]

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@Boehm Collector wrote:

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@LilacTree wrote:

@KingstonsMom

My own dear mom, a tiny little thing, vastly intelligent and loving, but damaged, had a horrible childhood too.  She never even knew who her father was, and her mother was a moron and worse.  And my poor mom got cancer at age 49 and died.  My father could be brutal, the typical Italian father who grew up being beaten by his father and gave it to us from time to time with a belt.  He knew nothing else and we forgave him for that, although we were all scared to death of him, which isn't so good.  He mellowed with age.

I am so relieved and happy to hear that you have a loving family now . . . to me that's everything.  I wish you all a joyful holiday!!

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Hi @LilacTree .. really sorry to hear your Dad was brutal.  But I have to respectfully disagree that is the "typical" Italian father.  My entire family came from Italy..... I still know many people.... including family and friends in Italy.  None of the fathers were brutal.  For the most part they were/are extremely loving parents.  My own Dad never laid a hand on us.  All he had to do to discipline us was to give us "the look".  LOL

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@Boehm Collector

I'm sorry I said that to you.  We lived in South Hackensack, which was then heavily into the mob and mob life.  I shouldn't have said "typical," because that was probably not typical.  But his father used to tie his mother to a tree and beat her with tree limbs.  This was legal and no one did anything about it.  The police chief was a mob member and my great uncle.  As I said, my father mellowed with age, and I believe sincerely regretted what he did.  Last time he abused me, I was 18 and already out of school and working.  He punched me in the back which threw me to the floor and then kicked me (fortunately with bare feet).  I didn't talk to him for six months.  That was the last time he abused any of us.  

Again, sorry I said that was typical.

[Boehm Collector]

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@LilacTree wrote:

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@Boehm Collector wrote:

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@LilacTree wrote:

@KingstonsMom

My own dear mom, a tiny little thing, vastly intelligent and loving, but damaged, had a horrible childhood too.  She never even knew who her father was, and her mother was a moron and worse.  And my poor mom got cancer at age 49 and died.  My father could be brutal, the typical Italian father who grew up being beaten by his father and gave it to us from time to time with a belt.  He knew nothing else and we forgave him for that, although we were all scared to death of him, which isn't so good.  He mellowed with age.

I am so relieved and happy to hear that you have a loving family now . . . to me that's everything.  I wish you all a joyful holiday!!

---

Hi @LilacTree .. really sorry to hear your Dad was brutal.  But I have to respectfully disagree that is the "typical" Italian father.  My entire family came from Italy..... I still know many people.... including family and friends in Italy.  None of the fathers were brutal.  For the most part they were/are extremely loving parents.  My own Dad never laid a hand on us.  All he had to do to discipline us was to give us "the look".  LOL

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@Boehm Collector

I'm sorry I said that to you.  We lived in South Hackensack, which was then heavily into the mob and mob life.  I shouldn't have said "typical," because that was probably not typical.  But his father used to tie his mother to a tree and beat her with tree limbs.  This was legal and no one did anything about it.  The police chief was a mob member and my great uncle.  As I said, my father mellowed with age, and I believe sincerely regretted what he did.  Last time he abused me, I was 18 and already out of school and working.  He punched me in the back which threw me to the floor and then kicked me (fortunately with bare feet).  I didn't talk to him for six months.  That was the last time he abused any of us.  

Again, sorry I said that was typical.

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No need to apologize @LilacTree.   But I am sorry that his father treated his mother so horribly.  And that you and your family also had to endure the abuse.  However, I'm glad that your Dad mellowed with age.  The Italian mob definitely pictured the typical Italian family in a bad light.