Re: Maybe We Should Stop Giving Advice?

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@rms1954 I understand what you said. There is one person in particular I don't want to call out, but a number of us have given her advice, I don't think she takes, and her mental state is fragile.

A number of us have specifically encouraged her to see doctors, etc. and I think maybe she isn't joining in because of that. I hope she is doing well, but I think maybe the value of coming here might be important and helpful more than the advice. Which I'm sure her doctors and relatives give her more than she cares to hear.

I worry. I worried about my mother for similar reasons, so I just thought I'd toss this out. Those who know her will recognize what I'm saying. Otherwise, it's a good topic I think in general.

alicedee · ‎07-25-2010

I never thought the forums were supposed to be like posting with your Facebook friends. Those people are your actual FRIENDS....and almost always will be loving, complimentary, and supportive.

I see these forums as places to discuss various subjects or situations that are posted....and you will get a variety of opinions and personalities responding. If someone is a really sensitive person, the forums probably aren't the best place for them to look for affirmation....people tend to speak their minds freely here.

i don't understand why people who are hurt by critical remarks post extremely personal stuff here...they would get more of the affirmation they are looking for with a group of their actual friends on FB.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@AuntG wrote:
Are you thinking of half pint? I recall her saying she still reads the boards but didn't feel like posting. Didn't sense any bad feelings.

@AuntG Having had a lot of experience with four people of similar disposition and problems, I am just tossing out the thought. NONE of them want to hear or discuss their issues, and that was that.

Like I say, I think participating is good for some, and you always get enough advice from those around you who know and understand you and your situation. . and sometimes that's overload

Icegoddess · ‎03-19-2010

@alicedee wrote:
I never thought the forums were supposed to be like posting with your Facebook friends. Those people are your actual FRIENDS....and almost always will be loving, complimentary, and supportive.

I see these forums as places to discuss various subjects or situations that are posted....and you will get a variety of opinions and personalities responding. If someone is a really sensitive person, the forums probably aren't the best place for them to look for affirmation....people tend to speak their minds freely here.

i don't understand why people who are hurt by critical remarks post extremely personal stuff here...they would get more of the affirmation they are looking for with a group of their actual friends on FB.

@alicedee , it may be specifically that we do not actually know the person's identity that gives them the courage to post here. They might not want their Facebook friends to know. And Facebook friends are not necessarily close friends. Most of mine are more acquaintences than true friends. I only have a handful of what I would consider true friends on Facebook.

denisemb · ‎12-07-2012

@Sooner

I respectfully disagree with you in this one instance as I generally agree/enjoy with many of your posts.

How can being encouraged to seek professional advice be considered inferior to allowing her to continue to share her problems on the internet?

Especially as it includes "a number of us"? Sorry, I think treatment by a professional to be emmensely more helpful than 1,000 "I'm so sorry", "poor you" from random strangers that definitely will not result in any change in this person's dilemma.

Denise

K9buddy · ‎03-09-2010

@denisemb wrote:
@Sooner

I respectfully disagree with you in this one instance as I generally agree/enjoy with many of your posts.

How can being encouraged to seek professional advice be considered inferior to allowing her to continue to share her problems on the internet?

Especially as it includes "a number of us"? Sorry, I think treatment by a professional to be emmensely more helpful than 1,000 "I'm so sorry", "poor you" from random strangers that definitely will not result in any change in this person's dilemma.

Do you not think that these people haven't been told a thousands times from friends/family/family doctors to seek professional help?

proudlyfromNJ · ‎05-01-2010

@K9buddy wrote:
@denisemb wrote:
@Sooner

I respectfully disagree with you in this one instance as I generally agree/enjoy with many of your posts.

How can being encouraged to seek professional advice be considered inferior to allowing her to continue to share her problems on the internet?

Especially as it includes "a number of us"? Sorry, I think treatment by a professional to be emmensely more helpful than 1,000 "I'm so sorry", "poor you" from random strangers that definitely will not result in any change in this person's dilemma.
Do you not think that these people haven't been told a thousands times from friends/family/family doctors to seek professional help?

@K9buddy This certain poster does not have many friends,family or doctors. In fact, maybe only one.

Anonymous032819 · ‎03-29-2019

This is from Halfpint1 on 10/23 on the thread "For those who were asking about me"

"I am okay and thank you who cared. I couldn't get in. Don't know much about a computer. My son was here and cleared up. I heard aout cookies so he got on here and cleared up things. Wishing y"

I don't think the reason that she hasn't been posting as much as she use to is because posters were telling her things that she didn't want to hear.

I think that her cognitive abilities are declining and she is getting more and more confused even by "simple" things.

That's my opinion anyway..

The Sky looks different when you have someone you love up there.

NicksmomESQ · ‎08-19-2014

Maybe some people feel alone & have no one in their lives to turn to.So they turn to us.We should always be kind & if necessary encourage those people to seek professional help like most of us on this forum do.

Those people who make unkind remarks should consider not responding at all.You don't know who you're really dealing with.If you say something nasty to someone who's on the edge you may just push them over.

denisemb · ‎12-07-2012

@K9buddy wrote:
@denisemb wrote:
@Sooner

I respectfully disagree with you in this one instance as I generally agree/enjoy with many of your posts.

How can being encouraged to seek professional advice be considered inferior to allowing her to continue to share her problems on the internet?

Especially as it includes "a number of us"? Sorry, I think treatment by a professional to be emmensely more helpful than 1,000 "I'm so sorry", "poor you" from random strangers that definitely will not result in any change in this person's dilemma.
Do you not think that these people haven't been told a thousands times from friends/family/family doctors to seek professional help?

so internet strangers offering "I'm sorry" platitudes will help sove their problems?

Denise