Community Chat

[chickenbutt]

I don't live alone, BUT I'm alone most of the time. Truth be told, and nothing against the husband at all, I like being alone. I'm not at all needy. Actually, he is the one who is needy. hehe

I enjoy time with myself and doing the things I want to do on the schedule I want to do them. It is a lot less stressful than having to conform all the time. I'm not saying that I'm not getalongable - not at all. I do stuff for him all the time and he does stuff for me all the time. But I probably function best when I'm by myself.

I really don't need somebody to be around all the time to know they love me. I don't need to have somebody to talk to. I'm not a big talker unless I actually have something to say. My husband, OTOH, is a huge talker. When he's home it's talktalktalktalk. I have to make the effort to hang with that, mostly because of the fact that I'm alone most of the time and not used to having to hold up a conversation all the time or listen to the stories about stuff I know nothing about and people I don't know, etc etc. But I DO listen and act interested. It's the least I can do.

Probably the only thing that sometimes bothers me is when he is out of town overnight - every now and then I get scared. I grew up never feeling safe, especially at night, and sometimes that little fear bit eeks its way into my head. I know I don't have anything to be afraid of, but it's just all those years of conditioning I guess. Mostly I do fine, but I do some extra blocking of doors and such when he's not here all night.

Sorry that turned into a novel. I'm really getting bad about that lately.

[Feline Fine]

On 7/12/2014 Junebug54 said:

On 7/8/2014 Feline Fine said:

On 7/8/2014 BigOrangeKitty said:

I was thinking mealtimes - eating alone - must be boring.......

That's what TV shows or movies are for.

Feline do you live alone?

Yes, June, I do; thanks for asking.

And thankfully have lived alone (I define it as 'residing with no other hoomans', heh) for the last 28 years, as I'm a born introvert, LOL.

I've been very fortunate and blessed to have been a cat guardian/companion over those years, but have to admit that I've been a bit lonely since Feb. 2013, when my only cat/soulmate passed on. He lived to be 18, though, so we both were extra blessed.

For the last almost-6 years, I've also been without personal autonomy and independence, so I rarely connect in RL with other hooman beings. Plus, I'm an only child, with no family since I was 32 (I'm 51 now), and don't have any close friends nor friendly neighbors. (cue the tiny violins, LOL)

So, the fact that I'm a born introvert has been another great blessing. And I mentioned that stuff above to answer your question, and maybe help others in a similar or related situation. That's always a nice bonus. 8)

What about you, June?

[Feline Fine]

On 7/14/2014 chickenbutt said:

I don't live alone, BUT I'm alone most of the time. Truth be told, and nothing against the husband at all, I like being alone. I'm not at all needy. Actually, he is the one who is needy. hehe

I enjoy time with myself and doing the things I want to do on the schedule I want to do them. It is a lot less stressful than having to conform all the time. I'm not saying that I'm not getalongable - not at all. I do stuff for him all the time and he does stuff for me all the time. But I probably function best when I'm by myself.

I really don't need somebody to be around all the time to know they love me. I don't need to have somebody to talk to. I'm not a big talker unless I actually have something to say. My husband, OTOH, is a huge talker. When he's home it's talktalktalktalk. I have to make the effort to hang with that, mostly because of the fact that I'm alone most of the time and not used to having to hold up a conversation all the time or listen to the stories about stuff I know nothing about and people I don't know, etc etc. But I DO listen and act interested. It's the least I can do.

Probably the only thing that sometimes bothers me is when he is out of town overnight - every now and then I get scared. I grew up never feeling safe, especially at night, and sometimes that little fear bit eeks its way into my head. I know I don't have anything to be afraid of, but it's just all those years of conditioning I guess. Mostly I do fine, but I do some extra blocking of doors and such when he's not here all night.

Sorry that turned into a novel. I'm really getting bad about that lately.

Never a biggie or a prob, CB - venting and sharing feelings and experiences is healthy. Plus, you never know when it might help someone.

And it's especially nice that you post on the Q boards, when you actually do have something to say. I find your views and tips interesting, often enjoyable, and admire you, BTW.

I also understand how you feel re: speaking; I lost any interpersonal skills that I might have had years ago, since the only talking that I've done consistently was with my beloved cat, LOL.

As I'm sure you know, guys in general kinda listen and act interested too, so your partnership with hubs is equal in that respect, heh.

Glad that you're blessed to have the 'Ru Dude', though. 8)

The item below is what I have at every entrance to my home and also by my bed, if it helps ease your "eeking' any. I'm highly-sensitive and anti-violence, but have also gone through and survived enough in my life to not use it if necessary. And it can take down a tree, hehe.

It's safety-smart to have around, even when your hubs is there. Everyone can use a little help now and then.

http://www.amazon.com/Cold-Steel-92BSS-Brooklyn-Crusher/dp/B001DRNLE6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1405454...

[chickenbutt]

Hey Kitty Cat! Yup, I always have the Rupinator to keep me company - and the bird boy of course.

I should tell you a cute story - Several days ago I was making breakfast for the bird. I had already washed and dried his dishes. Of course, Ru is always there to 'help' - mainly because he gets a couple bites of cantaloupe and apple, and whatever fruit the bird is getting.

As I was taking the food items out of the refrigerator and freezer to make the breakfast, I suddenly hear this really loud - Hiiiii !! - I thought 'hmmm, how odd that it would sound so loud from where he is to here'. Then it hit me 'ruh roh - he's right here in the room'.

I looked down and there, standing right next to Rupert, was the bird. yikes! They were both just standing there looking up at me.

Of course, I kept my cool and scooped up the bird but I was a little scared there for a minute. I guess he jumped down from his cage and walked all the way up the hall, through the living room and dining room, and into the kitchen (which he really never does since Ru came).

I guess all my talking with Ru about how we never hurt animals and especially little birdies really stuck. I talk to him a lot about gentleness and never hurting anybody. Whew! The bird just stood there a few inches from Ru as they both patiently waited for me to feed their tummies.

Anyway, maybe you had to be there but it was just so cute. Wish I had gotten a pic of that - the 90lb pupmeister and the less than one pound birdie waiting like little brothers.

[Feline Fine]

On 7/15/2014 chickenbutt said:

Hey Kitty Cat! Yup, I always have the Rupinator to keep me company - and the bird boy of course.

I should tell you a cute story - Several days ago I was making breakfast for the bird. I had already washed and dried his dishes. Of course, Ru is always there to 'help' - mainly because he gets a couple bites of cantaloupe and apple, and whatever fruit the bird is getting.

As I was taking the food items out of the refrigerator and freezer to make the breakfast, I suddenly hear this really loud - Hiiiii !! - I thought 'hmmm, how odd that it would sound so loud from where he is to here'. Then it hit me 'ruh roh - he's right here in the room'.

I looked down and there, standing right next to Rupert, was the bird. yikes! They were both just standing there looking up at me.

Of course, I kept my cool and scooped up the bird but I was a little scared there for a minute. I guess he jumped down from his cage and walked all the way up the hall, through the living room and dining room, and into the kitchen (which he really never does since Ru came).

I guess all my talking with Ru about how we never hurt animals and especially little birdies really stuck. I talk to him a lot about gentleness and never hurting anybody. Whew! The bird just stood there a few inches from Ru as they both patiently waited for me to feed their tummies.

Anyway, maybe you had to be there but it was just so cute. Wish I had gotten a pic of that - the 90lb pupmeister and the less than one pound birdie waiting like little brothers.

My all-in-one reaction to this post and story of yours, Chicky:

Man, I really wish I had been there - woulda been one of the best times in my life! But you so expressively painted those cutegasm-inducing (at least for me) scenes that it makes me feel like I was. So funny and witty. 8)

Shoot, I can't believe I almost forgot about the birdie boy! Tell me his name, please, and what breed and colors he is. I love birds, too.

Hmm... so you actually have two sons - awesome. Double the daily adorableness and entertainment factor. 8)

Pretending this is Ru and birdboy as babies...

[LurkyLoo]

On 7/8/2014 kittyfan said:

Eating alone is a real drag.

It can be for me, especially since I love to cook. I try to plan special meals around guests occasionally, as well as prepare meals I can take and enjoy with friends and neighbors. I would though much rather dine alone at home, then out in restaurants. Have never adapted well to that at all.

[chickenbutt]

Feline Friend - Ha! Not only is that little golden light, like Ru, but the parrot s/he's kissing is the same as my bird, Tarzan (nope, we didn't name him - we rescued him at about 5 years of age) except that Tarzan is a boy. That Eclectus in the picture is a girl.

The interesting thing about Eclectus parrots (Tarz is a Solomon Eclectus from the Solomon Islands) is that the boys are bright neon green, with a little bit of red, neon turquoise, and grey under the arms. The girls are bright red with purple - as you see in the pic.

Ru is a very gentle boy and I've really worked on having him understand how important it is to be very gentle and to not hurt other animals. He also knows that Tarz is his brother. When Ru was little I would pick him up and take him to Tarz to check out and we talked about that stuff a lot. It's shockingly amazing to me sometimes how smart Ru is. BTW, we didn't name Ru either. But we decided to keep his name from the breeder. We got him when he was 8wks and 5days old. Rupert seemed like a good name for him and I liked the story.

I'm a huge RuPaul fan, so that would have been a good name. We call him Ru a lot and I think of RuPaul also.

[Feline Fine]

On 7/17/2014 chickenbutt said:

Feline Friend - Ha! Not only is that little golden light, like Ru, but the parrot s/he's kissing is the same as my bird, Tarzan (nope, we didn't name him - we rescued him at about 5 years of age) except that Tarzan is a boy. That Eclectus in the picture is a girl.

The interesting thing about Eclectus parrots (Tarz is a Solomon Eclectus from the Solomon Islands) is that the boys are bright neon green, with a little bit of red, neon turquoise, and grey under the arms. The girls are bright red with purple - as you see in the pic.

Ru is a very gentle boy and I've really worked on having him understand how important it is to be very gentle and to not hurt other animals. He also knows that Tarz is his brother. When Ru was little I would pick him up and take him to Tarz to check out and we talked about that stuff a lot. It's shockingly amazing to me sometimes how smart Ru is. BTW, we didn't name Ru either. But we decided to keep his name from the breeder. We got him when he was 8wks and 5days old. Rupert seemed like a good name for him and I liked the story.

I'm a huge RuPaul fan, so that would have been a good name. We call him Ru a lot and I think of RuPaul also.

Chicky Chick - thanks for the fascinating SE parrot info., and didja know that Goldens originated in Scotland? Now you know! LOL

Tarz & Ru's names are really appropriate for them, I think (BTW, I love RuPaul too; awesome show). With your writing talent and imagination, you should think about starting a children's book (series?) starring them in "The Amazing Adventures of Tarz and Ru" or something similar. Seriously, your posts are enjoyable and you have a great sense of humor, so...

I enjoy picturing your life lesson session with Ru, and it was super smart to start them when he was a wee babe. The whole thing is so sweet and cute, and Ru sounds like he has a high doggy IQ and EQ ('emotional intelligence'). Plus, animals (& kids, BTW) are naturally psychic, so that helps.

Hey, I hope you consider my idea; you'd be purrfect (hehe) for it. 8-)

[insomniac]

I live alone and I love it! I'm very involved with OLLI (a senior citizen group), teaching and taking classes. I'm also a volunteer at a local library.

Additionally, I'm very much into reading. Not enough hours in the day!

[HiLo]

On 7/10/2014 BeanCounter17 said:

I love living alone - and meals alone do not bother me at all. I love my peace and quiet but that does not mean I am a loner. Its actually just the opposite, I travel a LOT with friends. It may be going away for long weekends, cruises, or flying somewhere for a week but even then - everyone gets their own room. I value my privacy very much - want to be able to do whatever I want without having to tiptoe around anyone else's idiosyncracies, my own are enough. If I want to stay up and watch TV I do but if I'm tired, I don't want to have to listen to the TV because someone else wants to watch it. If I don't want to be alone, I make some calls and get into my car and go visit friends, but always returning back home to the quiet that is my home.

The only con I can ever think about living alone in my own case is that if I choke or sustain a fall and hurt my leg and couldn't walk or there is some other emergency, I'm the only one around because I live very rural - my friends all live about an hour away but I wouldn't have it any other way.

If my husband was still alive I would have loved having him here but under the circumstances I really like living alone. No 2nd marriage would have ever been for me because of all the reasons you mentioned above with the exception of the emergency statement but then we have gagets for that problem today as well. As long as there is a telephone and I have friends I am perfectly content without others living with me.