Community Chat

[LilacTree]

On 9/19/2014 tansy said: It seems like a no-brainer to me, Ford, that the insurance money should be a 3-way split in the situation you describe. Years ago I might have handled it differently. I'm assuming you will ask the three to chip in though so you are not struggling bill wise.

Yes. I can still handle this last increase. Once it goes beyond that (which could be just a few months), they will then start pitching in.

[terrier3]

On 9/19/2014 Ford1224 said:

Now I remember your answer, Terrier3, and so I know I posted this before, but can't remember if I posted the beneficiary part.

About the TV offers . . . ha ha, I won't last that long!!

If I can keep this policy as is, they will get a lot more than $25,000 each. I will wait to see what the State can do for me. Boy . . . the last ten years have been really tough on my little family . . . all of us.

Really, each girl would get $25,000 less. But they won't have to contribute anything to the premiums. They each will still get a nice inheritance...and you won't have to have them kick in money now and you won't have to pay out more yourself either. You won't have to go through the unpleasantness of disinheriting anyone either.

I would use my money while I am here to enjoy it!!!!

BTW - You can also direct different percentages for each beneficiary too. Ex.: 10% to oldest, well off daughter, 30% each to the 3 daughters (if you will have them contribute to keep your death benefit higher). You don't need to cut out daughter #1 entirely.

[LilacTree]

On 9/19/2014 Sushismom said:

On 9/19/2014 Ford1224 said: <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><br /> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">My dilemma is, do I keep this daughter on the policy as a beneficiary or not? Once my other daughters are helping to pay the premiums, is it really fair for her to receive the same benefits as they get when the time comes? The money won’t mean the same to her as it will to my other daughters, however, she is still my child. <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">What would you do?

I would leave a small portion to the daughter who's not interested in contributing and the rest I would equally divide among the other 3.

As the policy stands now, I have already left my oldest daughter's two adult children a decent sum. Enough for them to know I thought about them too.

[minkbunny]

Ford, first of all, yes you will be here in 3-5 years so stop that talk.

Isn't there any financial planner, say at your bank, that you trust to actually explain your options in person? You have been given some good advice by terrier and others but if you could be face to face it would seem so much easier. Or an attorney, most do not charge for an initial consultation - yours would be regarding estate planning.

It is so confusing. I wish you well, worry about all of this cannot be good for your health.

[LilacTree]

On 9/19/2014 bluegrassbaby said:

I think you already know the answer to this dilemma, Ford...do what your heart tells you to do.

To tell you the truth, bluegrassbaby, my heart is too broken to know what to do. I'm hoping the State will have an answer for me. There's more to this than I can post, much more than just the money, that's all I can say.

[RetRN]

If you have able bodied children, I do not understand why you feel you need to leave them money. You should be enjoying your life using YOUR money. They can fend for themselves. I agree with your oldest daughter, why should she pay towards the policy when she realizes that she needs to be able to care for her own needs?

[LilacTree]

On 9/19/2014 minkbunny said:

Ford, first of all, yes you will be here in 3-5 years so stop that talk.

Isn't there any financial planner, say at your bank, that you trust to actually explain your options in person? You have been given some good advice by terrier and others but if you could be face to face it would seem so much easier. Or an attorney, most do not charge for an initial consultation - yours would be regarding estate planning.

It is so confusing. I wish you well, worry about all of this cannot be good for your health.

I agree, minkbunny. I should be hearing from the State within two weeks and go from there. I talked to my rep on the phone a few days ago, and he seemed genuinely interested in helping me.

[Catitude]

On 9/19/2014 twopeas said:

I probably have a very different view on leaving life insurance to kids, but here goes. I have three children that are grown and I have been very generous to them over the years. They are the beneficiaries in our wills. That being said, I see no reason to pay hard earned money for life insurance policy premiums in order to leave my kids a chunk of change. I received zero from my parents and have done fine. My kids are perfectly capable of making their own way. If one has the means, fine, but if it is a hardship, I don't think it's the best option.

ITA, I would never want my elderly mother fretting, worrying, tapping into money to pay for an insurance policy so that I can have a few bucks when she passes. Seems the OP is guilt ridden about something and wants to make up for it by leaving her daughters' money. Sad

[terrier3]

On 9/19/2014 Ford1224 said:

On 9/19/2014 bluegrassbaby said:

I think you already know the answer to this dilemma, Ford...do what your heart tells you to do.

To tell you the truth, bluegrassbaby, my heart is too broken to know what to do. I'm hoping the State will have an answer for me. There's more to this than I can post, much more than just the money, that's all I can say.

Ford - I think I also posted about the class action suits that were litigated against these kind of policies...I did get some money back - but that was 25 years ago and it took many years before they settled.

Hopefully the state board that oversees financial products can help you. I'm sure there have been more lawsuits over the years as people experienced the problems you are facing.

[LilacTree]

On 9/19/2014 RetRN said:

If you have able bodied children, I do not understand why you feel you need to leave them money. You should be enjoying your life using YOUR money. They can fend for themselves. I agree with your oldest daughter, why should she pay towards the policy when she realizes that she needs to be able to care for her own needs?

I could write a book on that premise. In fact, I practically have in my journals. But it's not for here. I appreciate your opinion.