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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,530
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything


@gidgetgh wrote:

@CJC wrote:

Have only read op, but I don't think this is terrible. It seems a nice idea to provide a private space for someone to stay whom parents do not know. Only thing is the shower. They should have had a shower available to her in the house somewhere. I myself would love this setup. DH and I never stay overnight at someone's house when we travel as we are uncomfortable with such an arrangement. We are private people with our own sleeping and eating schedule, but we do like to visit others during daytime hours. 



@CJC - you're kidding, right?  She sat there, by herself, in a trailer with a hot plate, mini fridge, port a potty toilet (no thanks) for 4 days.  The wonderful boyfriend took her out to lunch "a few times". Other than that, she just sat there.  Give me a break.  No freaking way.  I'd have been gone from there so fast their heads would have spun. 


Maybe it's the generation thing.   When I was dating a guy out of state I never stayed at his parents' house....stayed at hotel (motel in those days haha). When a boyfriend visited me, my parents paid for room at nearby hotel. Never even considered it an issue, but then I'm old. Heck, when I was in college no male visitor was even allowed past the lobby in the women's dorm, and my date had to sign a register and state where he was taking me and when we would return. Not my world any longer. 

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Posts: 3,017
Registered: ‎11-15-2011

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything


@JamandBread wrote:
Maybe they do not want their unmarried son under their roof with his girlfriend. They could have some kind of moral or religious convictions your niece isn't aware of.

@JamandBread  Even so, they never invited her into the house during the day to shower or socialize with them.  I can understand them not wanting them to sleep together but they way they all behaved was werid.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 772
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything

HUGE red flags & she has no one to blame if she ends up marrying him & something happens after the wedding. It's only been a few months since they met? Personally I wouldn't be wedding planning that soon with anyone, even a perfect gentleman! People's true colors don't come out that quick! And it's a "true color" that he thought the whole camper thing was a-okay! Not even letting her in the house too???

I'm not justifying ANY of this but if his family lived in a trailer or a super super tiny apartment or home, I maybe could see this(the trailer, not the refusing to let her even come in the home), but you clearly stated they had more than enough room for her.

If she doesn't run, she's either a doormat or just looking for a husband, sorry to say.
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Posts: 3,635
Registered: ‎05-21-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything


@CJC wrote:

Have only read op, but I don't think this is terrible. It seems a nice idea to provide a private space for someone to stay whom parents do not know. Only thing is the shower. They should have had a shower available to her in the house somewhere. I myself would love this setup. DH and I never stay overnight at someone's house when we travel as we are uncomfortable with such an arrangement. We are private people with our own sleeping and eating schedule, but we do like to visit others during daytime hours. 


@CJC    If you were left alone in a small camper for 4 days with no shower and had to wash off with a dish rag and cook meals on a hot plate would you still think that this was a "nice idea?" The boyfriend took her to lunch one time and the rest of the time she was left alone while he visited with his parents. Please go back and read what the OP said in additional comments.  This treatment goes beyond being strange and inhospitable it borders on abuse and is just plain creepy and frightening to me.

 

 

But the sad part is this young woman who the OP said is a very smart girl and is a mechanical engineer is shopping for wedding dresses and hoping that this guy will ask her to marry him. She  allowed herself to be treated this way for 4 days. This says something about her.  If she were my niece or daughter or friend I would be beyond frightened for her. I hope she comes to her senses and tells this boy and I do mean boy that she wants no part of a continued relationship with him. 

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Posts: 14,177
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything

I am confused about the shower thing. Why didn't she ask or say she was going to get a shower? 

Generally when people do not speak up they fear something. I think she wanted a proposal.

These people  are not keepers. As a beloved relative of mine used to say,"run,sheep,run".

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,469
Registered: ‎10-18-2011

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything

I can't imagine a family sitting around a kitchen or dining room table, "catching up", & not thinking about that poor girl, outside & alone!  Please let us know how it works out.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,355
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything

Bye-bye to that momma's boy before she invests any more of her life in the relationship.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,177
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything

Just read through all the replies. This is a joke,right?

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Posts: 4,532
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything

It's ALL bizarre but who in the world does not offer a guest a place to shower. I think that's the weirdest part by far...it stinks!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,635
Registered: ‎05-21-2010

Re: Just when I thought I had heard everything

@Group 5 minus 1   If this had been posted on 4/1 I would think that the OP was pulling an April Fools joke on us but no it was posted 4/14

 

I'm off to search if this might be related to a Lifetime movie theme but sometimes things that appear to be too crazy to be real turn out to be very real.