Community Chat

[Joey Heatherton]

I've been following this thread and trying to keep up, but it's fast-moving so forgive me if I repeat what others have already said.........I just wanted to add a bit from my perspective..........In the last almost-two years, my family and I have lived with the everyday reality of home health aides............many have been godsends.........a few have been h.e.l.l. on earth...........a family's constant vigilance is necessary............however, I know some clients have no family to speak of and are entirely reliant on the goodwill of their aides..........I can't help but feel a compassion for Leroy..........he's been characterized here (by some) harshly and close to demonized.........Yes, we don't know him from Adam and he's been given a pseudonym but I cringe at the conclusions reached about him...........it's very possible Leroy was once an independent, hardworking man, who relied on his own wherewithal to survive in life........now he's homebound and beholden to others............maybe what happened with JustJules was a symptom of early onset dementia....or maybe Leroy misconstrued......or maybe his idle mind turned to wishful thinking........he's in a sad situation..........JustJules, I urge you to get your own cell for safety and peace of mind.............every aide my mother has had carried a cell provided by the agency..........also, you mention that you are holding down both a f/t and a p/t job..........take care of yourself and try to give yourself a break..........both you and your clients will be the better for it........best of luck.......

[raven-blackbird]

On 3/11/2015 Marienkaefer2 said:

On 3/11/2015 raven-blackbird said:

On 3/11/2015 Autumn in NY said:

What seems odd (to me) upon reading the original post again, is that Leroy "ruined" everything when he made a pass at her. It seems obvious to me that the OP was looking for a friend/relationship/family with this client. Not professional in the least to bring the dog, not carry a cellphone, share a birthday cake, etc. Screaming "I'm not a prostitute" was totally out of line and unprofessional. Can't image a "trained" employee handling a situation in that manner.

SNAP.............that ONE sentence I found odd to and VERY telling........"he ruined everything"........how does a client ruin everything IF you have a professional relationship................................raven

I think what she meant by "ruined it all" (in the context of the sentence where this was written) is that she had tried to be a little extra nice (brought him a birthday cake, etc) and his behavior clearly cast a shadow on her good intentions. Let's not forget that however business like we are supposed to be, we are still human beings. For Jules' part, she probably enjoyed his company while she was there because maybe (my thinking) he reminded her of her dad, who recently passed and who she misses. She felt sorry for him, and because she has A GOOD HEART, she tried to show him a little extra kindness. Of course we all make mistakes. NO ONE is perfect (although many people like to think they are.) I'm sure Jules will learn from this experience, as WE ALL should learn when we make mistakes or miscalculations in judgment. Whatever else, she came from a place of kindness when dealing with this man. In a world where we hear so much bad about how our elderly are treated, it's nice to know that someone will think about bringing a birthday cake to a lonely person. I see no reason to pick at her until the flesh is gone from her bones. Now, you can proceed to tar and feather me for saying this. Give it all you've got. Knock yourself out.

Why on earth would anyone do that..........for the most part, at least around here...... you get, what you've given........on that note, let's hope she learns from this.......................................raven

[Joey Heatherton]

On 3/11/2015 raven-blackbird said:

On 3/11/2015 jessa said:

Maybe jobs & training are different depending on the state or whoever regulates and controls?

it's doubtful............basically a home health care assistant does what families used to do for each other and just called it being part of a family................................raven

When our mother had her first debilitating fall close to two years ago, she had surgery, a lengthy hospital stay and six weeks in a rehab............when we finally got her home, she was weak and no longer safe to care for herself in her tiny bathroom...........I left my own family to move in with mom for three months to get her back to some semblance of health..........however, she adamantly refused to let me bathe her...........She was embarrassed and had her pride......I respected her wishes and got an aide for baths and shampoos...........sometimes even the most devoted of loving families still must ask for independent help..........

[Moonchilde]

OP, you didn't need any of this. You made a couple of errors in judgment because you have a kind heart and you're new at this type of work. You had the best intentions. Understandable, but I'm sorry you had to be made wiser in this way.

As for Leroy, no one here knows - did he misconstrue your actions, is he getting senile, is he just a lonely old man, or a lech. But he was a learning experience at any rate.

I hope you have much better luck with your next client - who hopefully will be female.

[emmysmom]

On 3/11/2015 MrsSweetieBear said:

Jules - I like it that your brought dog. Guess she is a dog now and not a puppy anymore. Anyway, dogs are good therapy. I thought everyone knew that!

The rest of it? I personally would not have let it get so far out of hand. The first leg rub after he faked having chest pains I would have been gone. I also would have my own cell phone. But hindsight is 20/20 and it is easier for all of us to say how we would have handled it after the fact.

Ita! She sounds like a caring caregiver. I have been asked if I would bring my dog! Dogs are good therapy..I have seen several in nursing homes. Hindsight is 20/20..! Most of the agencies I've worked with were totally out of touch, they just wanted a caregiver in a slot to get their pay! Seriously..thats why I no longer work with agencies! I feel for Jules!

[Cakers1]

On 3/11/2015 emmysmom said:

On 3/11/2015 MrsSweetieBear said:

Jules - I like it that your brought dog. Guess she is a dog now and not a puppy anymore. Anyway, dogs are good therapy. I thought everyone knew that!

The rest of it? I personally would not have let it get so far out of hand. The first leg rub after he faked having chest pains I would have been gone. I also would have my own cell phone. But hindsight is 20/20 and it is easier for all of us to say how we would have handled it after the fact.

Ita! She sounds like a caring caregiver. I have been asked if I would bring my dog! Dogs are good therapy..I have seen several in nursing homes. Hindsight is 20/20..! Most of the agencies I've worked with were totally out of touch, they just wanted a caregiver in a slot to get their pay! Seriously..thats why I no longer work with agencies! I feel for Jules!

I'm pretty sure most posters know that dogs can be therapy.

The point is that her dog was not part of her job description; she brought the dog on her own.

And I don't recall any poster saying that Jules was not a caring person overall.

[Slate]

On 3/11/2015 HollyDays said:

No reputable home health care agency would allow their employees to bring a dog with them. Just because he asked, doesn't give you authority to make that decision. The agency would be liable if something were to happen with a dog in his home.

Are you sure you didn't answer his ad for help on Craigslist?

I thought you were a top selling realtor?

Correct. I bet if she checks with her supervisor she will tell her it's against the rules, maybe even a cause for dismissal.

[betteb]

On 3/11/2015 mochachino said:

On 3/11/2015 JustJules said:

On 3/11/2015 mochachino said:

On 3/11/2015 JustJules said:

On 3/11/2015 HollyDays said:

So if a client asks you to bring your cat or your kids or your pet hamster, you oblige? The agency needs to train their employees better. You hear all kinds of horror stories about employees stealing, abusing the elderly etc. It's very weird that the supervisor showed little to no interest. You have no experience doing this yet they assign you to clients that need to be bathed?

Who said I had no experience bathing people? Just because I am not a licensed nurse, lots of people in the home health industry bath people...it's not something that requires a license.

sorry, but you are wrong. No person can walk in off the street, be sent to a patient's home, especially a male, with no other family members around, and bathe them. Who in their right mind would let that happen when the caregiver is not even trained on medical emergencies? You didn't know the man's medical history so what if bathing him caused a severe reaction?

Again, my mother has dementia and will not allow anyone family member or nurse to bathe her because she is afraid of water at this point in her disease and would scream and hit the person trying to bathe her.

No, you are wrong, and making assumptions about things. Bathing was not part of Leroy's care. As for patients that do require it, I am qualified and have proper training, I DO know their medical history, and did not just "walk in off the street" with sponge in hand ready to bathe people as you suggest. Ridiculous!!!!

nope, not wrong. Have been working with HHA , nurses, STNAs, aides of all kinds for 4 years. I know who does what, what qualifications they need, how they get paid and so on.

Your agency sounds more like just an employment agency rather than a health certified agency especially if you sad you talked to the supervisor and told her everything and she had no problems with you bringing a pet or screaming at the man about NOT being a prostitute.

ETA: NOT, ty croemer

Not trying to fan the flames here Mocha, but those laws vary greatly from state to state and even sometimes from funding source to funding source. There are definitely instances where a non-licensed person can give baths (do personal care)

[betteb]

On 3/11/2015 jessa said:

Maybe jobs & training are different depending on the state or whoever regulates and controls?

Yes they are different from state to state

[betteb]

On 3/11/2015 raven-blackbird said:

On 3/11/2015 jessa said:

Maybe jobs & training are different depending on the state or whoever regulates and controls?

it's doubtful............basically a home health care assistant does what families used to do for each other and just called it being part of a family................................raven

Hey Raven-Yes it's true that laws on this are different. I believe in your earlier post, it said "Home Health Aides give medication and changed dressings". Home Health Aides in Kansas can't do those things. It requires a minimum of an LPN(Licensed Practical Nurse). If the clients funding source is Medicare, it requires an RN.

An HHA can do medication reminders. They can verbally remind the client to take meds, but the client has to be capable of actually taking them.