JOKES OF THE DAY PART 4

Lindsays Grandma · ‎03-10-2010

43. Prof. tip: If you stir coconut oil into your kale salad

it makes it easier to scrape it into the trash.

44. Let's go out into the scorching heat wave to avoid frostbite from our office air conditioning.

45. Yeah, so we're going to be short staffed forever. So if you could just work yourself to death, that'll be great.

46. I'm sorry sir, it looks like your luggage is too heavy for the plane. You'll have to remove some items and put them in your carry-on which is going on the same plane.

47. You know you're a grown up when you actually pick up the ice cube instead of kicking it under the fridge.

48. Why does it take you 3 to 5 business days to refund my money, when it only took you 3 to 5 seconds to take my money?

49. The good thing about water is you can drink it at work. The good thing about vodka is that it looks like water.

50. I wonder what people who type 'u' instead of "you" do with all their free time.

51. When you already started eating and someone says, "Let us pray."

52. Black Friday:

Because only in America, people trample others for

sales exactly one day after being thankful for what

they already have.

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam