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Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,060
Registered: ‎05-01-2020

I'm sorry. 

 

As mentioned, grief is different for everyone so take the time you feel you need with it.

 

As far as getting some joy and celebrating your birthday, find things you can do for others. Sometimes secret service is the funnest kind. One idea for your birthday - not sure how old you're turning but maybe come up with that many ways or people to do something for (ie donate to charities, send notes, paint rocks and leave them for people to find, etc). These are just a couple things that you can do on your own time (schedules can be challenging when not feeling up to doing much). 

 

Sending hugs.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,913
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@Jordan2 

 

I will make this short. In the mid '90's I lost interest in everything in life. That is when I asked my wife to take me to the hospital. I had myself admitted into the Mental Health Ward, where I spent 7+ days.  

 

My diagnosis was Clinical Depression and Anxiety/Panic Disorder. Without that help I would not be here.

 

Won't go into family members that died, but there were several very close to me. I said this would be short, and that is my summation.

 

I wish you well 

 

 

hckynut

hckynut(john)
Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,351
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Thank you all for the kind words and advice. I find people on these boards kinder and nicer than those that are suppose to be close to me. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,254
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@Jordan2you deserve to be treated well Heart  We are here for you

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,086
Registered: ‎10-03-2014

I was talking with Hospice one day when the representative told me some people take up two years to go through the grieving process. 

 

It's best to let them take all the time they need, not to push it.  Don't tell them to get out and do things when they aren't ready.  So, I won't.  After two years, she suggested the person see a professional for help.  

 

I wish I lived near you.  I'd make sure your birthday was a very special day.

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,620
Registered: ‎09-22-2010

@Jordan2 

 

Make plans for your own birthday.  Invite a friend to a restaurant you have always wanted to try to "help celebrate you birthday" or plan something you have always wanted to do and invite someone to go with you.  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,130
Registered: ‎06-14-2010

hckynut

 

Your post touched me and I commend you for sharing such a painful time and most of all for getting the help you needed.  After my mother passed I too had to seek help, just talking to a professional and my friends helped.  There is no shame in admitting we need support to get us through difficult and trying times. It shows strength when we think we don't have any. Thanks for posting.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,096
Registered: ‎12-17-2011

@Jordan2  I wish we knew each other we would have a really nice time on your birthday. Please remember your not the only one dealing with this 😘

Honored Contributor
Posts: 34,486
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@Jordan2 

 

I can't imagine that loved ones who have passed would want us to live in pain.

 

I've always believed that when someone leaves us, we should carry on something that was important to that person.  

 

When my sister died I started feeding the birds in the yard because that was something she did that was important to her.  I donated to organizations that she had supported.  I continue to watch films and listen to music she liked.  There are several things I do to honor her by keeping what was special to her special.

 

I have found comfort in that.

~My philosophy: Dogs are God's most perfect creatures. Angels, here on Earth, who teach us to be better human beings.~
Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,130
Registered: ‎06-14-2010

jordon2

 

Do not despair, just posting your feelings show you want help and support and do not hesitate to get it whether it be professional or support from family or friends.  When I go through down times I talk to a friend or friends and find that just having someone listen helps.

 

I hope you find peace of mind and joy enters your life.  Sometimes when we least expect it, our spirits are lifted by someone or something, may that come to you.