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03-20-2019 09:02 PM
03-20-2019 09:09 PM
@Its Me LuLuBelle2 Thank you for such kind words. I think it is important to be a good friend.
03-20-2019 09:21 PM
It sounds to me like you are both very lucky to have each other as a friend! I think your friendship is very special to her and she appreciates your help.
03-20-2019 09:31 PM
03-20-2019 09:37 PM
@kivah wrote:I was in the hospital from March 2nd thru March 7th - before I drove myself to the hospital, I emailed a friend of mine that I'll be going there. Every day that I was there, she visited me - and even brought me an orchid plant. A few days after I arrived home, she came to my house and I gifted her with several L'Occitane products and a foam hand cleaner and refill. I put all of it in a nice gift bag. She appreciated it - and I appreciated her!!!!
Your friend is very kind - so appreciate her!!!!!
Hope you are feeling better. That is nice that you and your friend are so thoughtful
to each other. It sure is the little things that brighten your day
03-20-2019 11:05 PM
@SXMGirl... I fully understand how you feel. If my dear friend had done that to me I would have felt offended and a bit angry with her. We were close friends for thirty five years when she passed away due to breast cancer. Unfortunately we lived 3,000 miles from one another for a number of years, and though we couldn't see one another a day never went by that we weren't on the phone, sometimes even twice a day.
I know without a doubt I would have driven her anyplace she wanted or needed to go. I also know due to her nature she would have done exactly what your friend did and I would have reacted as you did. No matter how many times I would have told her she should not have done it and would have to take it back, she would have laughed while telling me it's too bad because she couldn't take it back.
Of course you will thank her while letting her know how you feel. No doubt she will say she wanted to do it because she very much appreciates what you did. Don't make an issue of it, she is not going to take it back. If it will make you feel better, a few weeks from now give her a call, tell her you feel like dinner out, pick a restaurant you both like and go. You of course will pick up the tab. In any event sxmgirl, let it all roll off your back and continue enjoying your friendship. I would give anything to have my friend back, you are so lucky to have one another.
03-20-2019 11:10 PM
@SXMGirl You’re offended because someone is saying thank you with a gift? Just graciously accept it & move on.
03-20-2019 11:35 PM
Sxmgirl, Consider the gift card a sign of how very grateful your friend is to you for the ride.
I can't tell you how much I've spent on cabs to get to medical appointments the past few years. Just yesterday in fact I spent $50 in cab fares to get to an eye appointment that was just ten minutes away. (And considering how wrecklessly those cabbies drove it probably would have been safer for me and everyone else on the road to have driven myself with my failing vision. )
Whenever a friend offers to drive me to an appointment it is impossible to express how very grateful I am. It means so very much. Going with a friend is so much more pleasant than it is to be driven by a wreckless rude stranger, and of course I feel so much safer.
Since I don't want to seem ingrateful, or a "taker," and I don't want to put my friend out in time or gas, I have been known to offer them money for gas or slip them restaurant gift cards. It horrifies me to think that maybe this small generosity could be misconstrued or perceived as an insult when it is really a sign of thanks and deep gratitude. Like I said the rides from friends mean so very, very much to me, and I am always incredibly grateful. Consider the gift card in this light, as a sign of your friend's deep gratitude, and her reluctance to appear to be taking advantage of your kindness.
You are very kind to be driving your friend to her appointments!
03-20-2019 11:47 PM
I think you just say thank-you and the next time she needs a favor or a ride just mention she has a "credit" on her account.
03-21-2019 12:04 AM
@SXMGirl wrote:Here's the story:
Last week, I took a friend to a doctor appointment that required her to be sedated. I volunteered to take her, she did not ask me, and I told her that it did not matter to me when she made her appointment. I treated her to lunch after her procedure. Everything is fine.
Today, in the mail, I get a thank you plus a $50 gift card, money that I know she cannot afford. I did not volunteer to take her to her appointment with the idea of getting any compensation. I am not happy about this. I realize that she had no one else to take her, but I don't think this is right.
So, any suggestions on how to handle this? It is an Amazon card, which I can always use, but I am uncomfortable with this, and maybe just a little offended that she thinks I should be paid for doing someithng that friends should do for each other.
What would you do? TIA!
It was wonderful of you to take your friend to the doctor's and to lunch!! You are so thoughtful. My take on this is to let her repay you by being gracious and thanking her! She feels that she needs to do something for you. Let her do it!
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