Re: How would you feel/react if ..

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said: Moonchilde, I can sympathize. He was rude and personally, I would have told him I was unable to get up. No excuses, and then I would simply have ignored him. I guess I have just lived a long time and do what I want and I don't care if some stranger thinks I'm not nice.

Thanks, SR :-) I too am not overly concerned what strangers think, so all the "you are just a silly rude person" responses without anything more constructive doesn't faze me. In these forums it's expected, and you know how people can't bear to disappoint ;-)

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

On 3/8/2015 scotttie said:
I note that there was another patron who had to move as well. Perhaps the guy with the GF should have waited for a table....

I also have a feeling it was not so much that he asked but the WAY he asked. Am I right moonchilde?

Absolutely. The way he asked and at what stage in my dining experience he thought it appropriate to ask.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said:
On 3/8/2015 terrier3 said:
On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said: Moonchilde, I can sympathize. He was rude and personally, I would have told him I was unable to get up. No excuses, and then I would simply have ignored him. I guess I have just lived a long time and do what I want and I don't care if some stranger thinks I'm not nice.

It was a crowded coffee shop and he needed two seats together.

It wasn't a big deal.

It's just kind (and easier) to comply. No reason to feel put out.

But she did feel put out and she is entitled to feel that way. What kind of a person sees someone eating their meal and asks them to move everything? A rude person..and when someone is rude, not everyone has to jump up and obey.

Those were my feelings exactly.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

cody2 · ‎03-19-2010

On 3/8/2015 moonchilde said:
On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said: Moonchilde, I can sympathize. He was rude and personally, I would have told him I was unable to get up. No excuses, and then I would simply have ignored him. I guess I have just lived a long time and do what I want and I don't care if some stranger thinks I'm not nice.

Thanks, SR :-) I too am not overly concerned what strangers think, so all the "you are just a silly rude person" responses without anything more constructive doesn't faze me. In these forums it's expected, and you know how people can't bear to disappoint ;-)

moonchilde, you asked how YOU would feel/react and people replied how THEY would feel/react. I, for one, did not call you silly or rude. I just answered your question. The danger in asking questions is getting answers that might, or might not, agree with you.

VioletEyes · ‎03-12-2010

On 3/8/2015 moonchilde said:
On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said: Moonchilde, I can sympathize. He was rude and personally, I would have told him I was unable to get up. No excuses, and then I would simply have ignored him. I guess I have just lived a long time and do what I want and I don't care if some stranger thinks I'm not nice.

Thanks, SR :-) I too am not overly concerned what strangers think, so all the "you are just a silly rude person" responses without anything more constructive doesn't faze me. In these forums it's expected, and you know how people can't bear to disappoint ;-)

What I find interesting is how anyone who has been trained in appropriateness and good manners could give this guy a free pass. You were in the middle of your meal and he should have had the manners to wait for either a table or for two seats to become available. I feel sorry for the woman he was with.

cody2 · ‎03-19-2010

On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said:
On 3/8/2015 moonchilde said:
On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said: Moonchilde, I can sympathize. He was rude and personally, I would have told him I was unable to get up. No excuses, and then I would simply have ignored him. I guess I have just lived a long time and do what I want and I don't care if some stranger thinks I'm not nice.

Thanks, SR :-) I too am not overly concerned what strangers think, so all the "you are just a silly rude person" responses without anything more constructive doesn't faze me. In these forums it's expected, and you know how people can't bear to disappoint ;-)

What I find interesting is how anyone who has been trained in appropriateness and good manner could give this guy a free pass. You were in the middle of your meal and he should have had the manners to wait for either a table or for two seats to become available. I feel sorry for the woman he was with.

Maybe the man and lady were eating on their lunch break from work. Maybe they didn't have a lot of time to wait. This was at a lunch counter not a 4-star, sit down dinner. What is so interesting about different folks having different opinions? Pretty normal.

It really doesn't warrant a war pitting one poster against another. It is just opinions on lunch.

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said:
On 3/8/2015 moonchilde said:
On 3/8/2015 terrier3 said:
On 3/8/2015 cody2 said:
I would have smiled and moved down one.

Me too.

It would have been a kind gesture.

You moved anyway...and it must have been uncomfortable being so close to them after you acted so huffy.

I "acted huffy?" I gave him an unhappy look because he could clearly see I was actively eating as he was asking. He did not actually say "sorry" to indicate he thought it was the slightest inconvenience. And it would not have been an inconvenience, nor would I have thought twice about it, if I had not been in the middle of a meal. Not the beginning before I was served food, and not the end. The.middle. Nor would I have minded all that much if he'd asked in a different way, as in "I'm so sorry to ask you at this point, but would you mind.." I don't know - I guess it's considered odd to expect the smallest bit of forethought and consideration when being asked to do something that's inconvenient. Not inconvenient like moving a water glass, but moving glass, a bowl and a full plate, silverware while eating.

But then, I knew I'd be in for it the moment I posted the OP, because people don't actually read what posters have said, they often respond as if you've said what you've taken pains to explain did not happen. I'm not surprised - or embarrassed either, sorry.

I guess rudeness is expected these days. All I know is I feel no reason to accommodate these types of people ...maybe thirty years ago I would have been intimidated but no more. And it seems even though you moved the clod got even ruder...

No, as I have gotten older, I am not intimidated by rudeness and the expectation that rudeness should be met with compliance. Easy? Yes, for him. Everybody's happy? No. I'm not, if I feel an attempt was being made to guilt me into doing something, instead of a sincerely at least slightly apologetic request.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

VioletEyes · ‎03-12-2010

On 3/8/2015 cody2 said:
On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said:
On 3/8/2015 moonchilde said:
On 3/8/2015 SoftRaindrops said: Moonchilde, I can sympathize. He was rude and personally, I would have told him I was unable to get up. No excuses, and then I would simply have ignored him. I guess I have just lived a long time and do what I want and I don't care if some stranger thinks I'm not nice.

Thanks, SR :-) I too am not overly concerned what strangers think, so all the "you are just a silly rude person" responses without anything more constructive doesn't faze me. In these forums it's expected, and you know how people can't bear to disappoint ;-)

What I find interesting is how anyone who has been trained in appropriateness and good manner could give this guy a free pass. You were in the middle of your meal and he should have had the manners to wait for either a table or for two seats to become available. I feel sorry for the woman he was with.

Maybe the man and lady were eating on their lunch break from work. Maybe they didn't have a lot of time to wait. This was at a lunch counter not a 4-star, sit down dinner. What is so interesting about different folks having different opinions? Pretty normal.

It really doesn't warrant a war pitting one poster against another. It is just opinions on lunch.