Community Chat

[lynnie61]

@stargazergal  Sadly, you must be from my office.  We walk on eggshells every day.  Never know if she will be having a good day or will make our day even worse.  I pray for her too.  Bottom line, miserable, unhappy soul.  Sad as it is.  I try to ignore, its VERY hard.  Bit my tongue more than a few times.  All I can do is my best each day.  Corporate America is WAY different than even five years ago.  I can’t control her, most days (not every day) totally unreasonable.  It is what it is.  I have a few years left to work, and don’t want to look for something else.  I just smile, don’t react and write it down. Believe me, some days I’m steaming mad.   I have my file someday if I need it.  I don’t have the luxury to just quit.  I tell myself there are worse situations to be in.  I sometimes think she gets even worse because we won’t give her the satisfaction to fight or call her out.  It’s a lose, lose situation.  It kills her that we are happy it’s not the job, it’s the people.   She knows deep inside she is wrong.  She thinks she has a great job, big house, great paycheck, great husband. Inside she knows she is miserable.  That’s the payback.  She has a sad life for sure if you live like that every day and thinks it’s ok.  

[SydneyH]

I'm pretty fortunate, I ****** it as soon as it's occurs.  However I do have co-workers who don't feel comfortable in doing that so they reach out to Corporate with their concerns.

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@Snowhite714 wrote:

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@stargazergal wrote:

What is the best response to someone who show's a total lack of disregard 

to a Co Worker   I have seen people leave this place of employement 

I have seen people stick it out for as long as they can and watch it ware 

them down.   

I myself........ have pondered my future because of the roller coaster ride.

I love my job,  I love the team.    I am as positive going in, but it is  tough

to witness a rude behavior towards employees that dedicate so much 

to this place of employment.    We never know what kind of mood she is 

going to be in.    It's like walking on eggshells.    

Any words of wisdom ?   Any stories to tell ?   

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@stargazergal   Are you able to share anymore info, how is she rude to you and other employees?  We're all adults why not speak to her about the situation?  Don't you have a Human Resources department?  Although my experience with HR is that they are a useless bunch in most situations.

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Having been in management and experienced many dealings with HR I wouldn't advise anyone to take a problem to them.  Employees need to keep in mind they are there to protect the company, not the employee.  Your remark is quite appropriate.

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@alarmclock wrote:

Never, ever trust Human Resources.

They are there to protect the company, not you.

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Yes, yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@RetRN wrote:

In this day and age if you need the job, the best thing to do is grin and bear it. Only other option is find another job. I would never go to HR, they are not your friend and you could end up being the one left out in the street. 

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You are 100% correct, they are there to protect the company.

[mintedrose]

((sigh)) Im sorry you have to go through this but all this happens to always teach us something we are ripe to learn in life. No person no matter how powerful or big has the right to treat another badly. 

I too was in an environment where the boss hated me. She was new and didnt know much and was so jealous that everyone at work loved me. I did all the leg work and never got a raise and she reaped all the benefits. She harassed me, brought her own people to intimidate me but it never worked. God is on my side and he protected me. I was very young and scared at that time and didnt know better and stuck there longer than i should have. I heard everyone's nonsense who said "just bear it w a smile" and "dont let her get to you". Know and understand that Some people are in a bad place always and they will take you down too if you dont move. Do you respect yourself enough to take action? I can go on an on about this but the lesson i learned was, If you are unhappy, leave or make the bully leave. 

If there are more people who feel the same way about this person perhaps its time to be bold and do something. However, be prepared for it to turn agaisnt you. There are many things you can do to run this person out so she leaves on her own or you leave. You have to decide what are you willing to put up with? 

[blackhole99]

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@sidsmom wrote:

Most companies, especially the larger ones, have a “3 times” rule.

It makes it r.e.a.l.l.y hard to fire someone.

If it’s a good associate, this rule protects the employee.

If it’s a poor associate, this rule protects the employee.

See how that works?

The process (if not violating Code of Ethics) is:

1. Verbal Warning

2. Written Warning

3. Termination

So whenever I hear/see someone proclaiming a ‘just fired’ &

getting ‘rid of him’, I read that with raised eyebrow. I’ve been on

the paperwork end of many, many, many managers & associates

to know termination just didn’t fall out of the sky. I stipulated 

violating Code of Ethics...depending on the position, those violations

are immediate termination...no wiggle room...but there’s documentation

during the ‘On-Boarding’ where the associate would take the training

and signed off on it before beginning Day 1...again, negating any

’just firing.’ 

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@sidsmom  you can raise your eyebrows all you want, this does happen more than you think. Even here at the Q a host can be broad sided with a" we no longer need your services".

[stargazergal]

There is no Human Resources office at this place of employement.   I am at peace 

with myself in my job perfomance.   On more than a few occassions in 

the past 2 years, I have honestly pondered my future there.    Especially 

most recently.   

The internet has a treasure trove of dealing with difficult people (Boss) It is 

her business.  which happens to be in my case.

 I do take into consideration her work load,

responsibilities, always.   In the long run, it is still no excuse to be treated

with lack of respect and really am trying to figure out how to respond 

to this behavior when she is at her wits end and barks at me in front of 

co workers. 

Yes I have seen her do this with other staff members, not all

of them.   These are hardworking people that have her back,  including me. 

I have decided most recently that I will not be staying in this abusive 

situation shall it continue.    

I have written a resignation letter for when the day comes that I have 

decided it is time.    It is tactful and sincere.   

I knew there would be stories one could tell on this thread.   The advice

I have given myself is go into work with a positive attitude,  do your very 

best,  and think of an exit plan for your future if there is disrespect in 

your work place, especially if you know it is not going to change.

Thanks to all for your replies everyone 

[stargazergal]

She is the owner of the business and no Human Resources.   Everyone goes

out on a limb for her, she has a great team.    She works very long hours 

and has a sucessful business.    I take into consideration always her long 

hours and all involved with owning a business.   Always.   

Most recently she has burst out at me on a few occassions.   No I cannot 

just talk to her when she calms down.    She is a tough cookie. 

No, I am not the only one that has seen how she can be.

I have decided to have an exit plan B  to protect myself.   I have a Resignation 

letter in place for when the time comes.    It is Sincere and Tactful.  

The advice I have given myself,  do not stay in a situation that messes 

with your inner peace.    Have a plan B in place.

[Brisky]

If somebody is being rude to you or those around you
speak up. Tell the person directly you don't deserve to be treated like that.