Community Chat

[wagirl]

@LadyAlice --thank you--yes I know how things can just happen but wonder why so many have to happen in a short period of time. Makes me appreciate the mundane, boring things of life--like right now--walking on my own 2 feet!! How I miss those days!! We will be fine....

[wagirl]

@BlueFinch ---Wow--don't think I've ever been on someones wish list---but will be happy when 2022 is in the rear view mirror!! thanks for your kind words!!

[arrabella]

@gidgetgh 

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@gidgetgh wrote:

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@arrabella wrote:

@gidgetghThank you so much.  I'm just so lost right now. It was just him and me, no family and most of our friends either passed away or moved out of Cali. I do have one couple who is keeping an eye on me and we meet at church. I thank God for them!

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@arrabella - less than a week after my husband died, I went to a doctor appt I had set up months before.  It was with my gyno and I went because I didn't want to go through the hassle to re-schedule, that seemed a little overwhelming, plus, he is the doctor I've seen the longest so I trust him, AND he had lost his wife a few years before so he would understand. 

He sat and talked to me like he had no other patients wathis journeyiting.  He told me that my body would physically be in shock for months...several months....and to expect that. And he told me to make no major decisions for at least 6 months. So, I am passing those on to you.

And, from me,  your grief journey is yours and yours alone.  I never tell anyone how they should grieve and I wouldn't take it well if someone tried to tell me.  So, please be gentle with yourself as you navigate this.  I don't ever sugarcoat it.  It's horrible. 

As public as these forums are, I am here for you and if I can be of any help to you at all, please just ask.  

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I never thought I would be traveling this road as I was 18 years older than him, and yes this is horrible!  We always went to church togrther and going without him is so hard but I push my self to go. So many loose ends that have to be taken care of, I find myself being overwhelmed at times. I'll not make any major decisions until my mind clears up. Thank you for your kind words

[arrabella]

@chrystaltreeThank you for your kind words.

[cotton4me]

I wasn’t going to answer this because the last few years have been difficult.  I commiserate with others who’ve lost their husbands and other loved ones.  I lost my husband in 2020.  I sold our home and moved twice.  There was a lot of upheaval and change. 

I’m now living in my permanent home, a retirement apartment, where I’m happy.  Not sure how or why but this is the first Thanksgiving that I’ve been able to face since my husband’s death.  Perhaps the fog of grief is beginning to lift.  I still think of him every day but I don’t dread the holiday this year. 

[FiddleDeeDee]

@Sooner  180 degrees. And, no one is happy about it.

[CelticCrafter]

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@Greeneyedlady21 wrote:
Nonsense is such an awful thing to say. Living life caring only about how things affect you, well that's nonsense to say the least. I'm glad that I wasn't raised that way and I could never live my life that way.

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@Greeneyedlady21 consider the source.

[ThinkingOutLoud]

I'm sorry to those who've had difficulties and challenges the past few years.

For me, my life is quite different since TG 2019 and in many positive ways. A lot of good came from the unfortunate circumstances we all faced that wouldn't have come any other way.

[tiny 2]

2019 was a terrible year for me. I lost my mother and on the day of her funeral Hospice started with my husband. I lost him a few days before Thanksgiving. I try to keep busy and accomplish something worthwhile with my leisure time. This seems to help. I am still finding my way and wondering what my purpose is. I am so grateful for the 32 years we had together. I know that I will never be loved that way again.

[San Antonio Gal]

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@CalminHeart wrote:

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@ID2 wrote:

We've never changed any of our plans. Pandemic or no pandemic. We were the only ones still celebrating together during ths nightmare. No one ever got sick. So glad we didn't let this nonsense bother us. 

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You're very lucky. I don't consider it nonsense that 900,000 people died including one of my best friends, 2 uncles, cousins, and other friends.  

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@CalminHeart  - So sorry for your tremendous loss.  I'm not uderstanding how some can have such a non-caring attitude about people loosing their lives.