Community Chat

[VioletEyes]

Sad disturbing and for the children's sake, I would put their needs above my own.

[straykatz]

There are times when you have to step back and let things be....IMO...this is one of those times....plus you're 2500 miles away so send gifts for special occassions but otherwise let them live their lives as they choose. I feel for the children who do not ask to be born into dysfunctional families.

[jeanlake]

ckr - This disappointment is so difficult when it happens within your own family. You never have to approve and they know you don't approve. Being silent is being safe. Be cordial when the occasion calls for it, and hang on tight to your wallet. Just as their way of life isn't your way of life -- your money isn't their money. Try to put emotional distance between yourself and this family.

[NC Bandwagon]

On 1/27/2015 chrystaltree said:

On 1/26/2015 ckr1147 said:

Oh for heaven's sake, chiclets, did you not read the thread??? She has two children she does not take care of - he has one that he can barely support - and now they are having another - is that really something anyone should be happy about? She has a criminal history to boot...

Would any sane person - money or no money - be happy???

.......NO, but as a Human being, you would PRETEND to be happy for them. If for no other reason, for her husband's sake. The child will be his BLOOD grandchild.

Not to sound rude to you, chrystaltree, but a person can only grin and bear it for so long. I don't know her, but I don't believe that ckr1147 is a bad person.

Many posters here seem to have "Cinderella syndrome" (not real, by the way, I just made that up).

They think that all step-mothers by default are these evil witches who lock their poor step-children in the basement, give them moldy bread and stale water, force them to clean the house from top to bottom, are mean to them and force them to cook at the stove all day, never being allowed to go out and see friends and such.

Besides, a man shouldn't disrespect a woman....even if that man is a woman's son or step-son. Sometimes pretending to "be happy" for someone just enables them to keep using you as doormat.

For those here who did have mean step-parents, you can't base your experience on someone else. Remember, there are some birth parents who are mean to their children and step-parents who treat their step-children like they're the greatest thing to ever happen to them.

Just my opinion.

[esmeraldagooch]

On 1/27/2015 ckr1147 said:

On 1/27/2015 Matty6 said:

Sounds like a very sad and disturbing situation.

It is - guess I am mainly venting my frustration here...nothing I do or don't do will help the situation which is why I need to step away and stop wasting energy/time on a situation that can't be ""fixed"or even improved by me or my husband.

Esmeralda gooch - wow - then you know where I am coming from - I see the future and it is not pretty...

Thanks everyone for your comments.

Yes, I've seen your train wreck before. This last child now almost 2 is the latest wrinkle.

He's a product of my MIL and SIL. Never expected to achieve anything so he doesn't. When he kept getting the gov to pay for the professions he though he might like to be, then quit the last day when the end tests were to be taken, (always ill the last day) then start a totally new school path the next year? shows he is not stupid, just knows how to work everyone, not to work.

[Sunnyfield]

Just a quick response to "pretending to be happy"" - when I was cordial and accepting of the gf into my home, even after I found out about her background, I was later accused of being phony, two-faced, and fake...so you really can't win, can you? Was told I had "no right" to Google her!!!